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WBraun
climber
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What a stupid thread of flowery insults ......
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Mighty Hiker
climber
Vancouver, B.C.
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Topic Author's Reply - Aug 9, 2012 - 09:04pm PT
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Oh, come on, Werner - you can do better than that.
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LilaBiene
Trad climber
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MH, you're timing, as always, is perfecto!
Marlow: Zur "Schade"...'s aber echt lustig!
I've always been fond of "You're mother was a hampster, and your father smelled of elderberry..."
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ms55401
Trad climber
minneapolis, mn
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"mewling quim" is pretty good. kind of like "poofter's froth" but more anglo and thus classier
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Sierra Ledge Rat
Mountain climber
Old and Broken Down in Appalachia
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I've always been fond of "You're mother was a hampster, and your father smelled of elderberry..."
1+
Yes, but do you know what it really means?...
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Sierra Ledge Rat
Mountain climber
Old and Broken Down in Appalachia
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IMHO...
Hamster = breeds loosely & frequently
Elderberry = wine
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hamie
Social climber
Thekoots
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"Fook off. Strong letter to follow."
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Spider Savage
Mountain climber
The shaggy fringe of Los Angeles
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From Val Kilmer film Tombstone
"Oh... I apologize, I forgot you you were there."
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Mighty Hiker
climber
Vancouver, B.C.
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Topic Author's Reply - Aug 9, 2012 - 10:27pm PT
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What is a hampster, anyway? Some sort of beast that lives in hampers?
I've heard of hamsters, and Bellinghamsters, but not these other critters.
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Fritz
Trad climber
Choss Creek, ID
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I confess to finding some good material here.
Credit to all, but I do most enjoy one excert from Twisted Crank's long, but uncredited report.
I will never get over the embarrassment of belonging to the same species as you.
My ex-mother in law actually said this to her youngest son, when he blurted out insider knowledge of a real-estate deal to the seller.
I swear they switched babies on me in the hospital!
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LilaBiene
Trad climber
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You're nothing but a sc#m-sucking, pasty-faced hack...
Can't remember where or when I heard it, but it struck me as pretty darn funny.
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o-man
Social climber
Paia,Maui,HI
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I get it!
You're helping?
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RyanD
climber
Squamish
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Aug 10, 2012 - 12:18am PT
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That's what they all say.
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JOEY.F
Gym climber
It's not rocket surgery
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Aug 10, 2012 - 01:10am PT
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Henry II..,All I want is peace
Eleanor...How about eternal peace?
Twisted, gonna print that post. Handy!
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Wayno
Big Wall climber
Seattle, WA
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Aug 10, 2012 - 02:57am PT
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What color is the sky in your world?
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mouse from merced
Trad climber
The finger of fate, my friends, is fickle.
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Aug 16, 2016 - 06:25pm PT
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In April of 1961, the inimitable Groucho Marx received a glossy annual report from the Franklin Corporation, a company in which he had recently become an investor. After flicking through the report, Groucho had some concerns, and so wrote the following letter to the company's President, Herman Goodman, to inform him.
(Source: The Groucho Letters; Image: Groucho Marx at 85, via.)
April 24, 1961
Dear Mr Goodman:
I received the first annual report of the Franklin Corporation and though I am not an expert at reading balance sheets, my financial advisor (who, I assure you, knows nothing) nodded his head in satisfaction.
You wrote that you hope I am not one of those borscht circuit stockholders who get a few points' profit and hastily scram for the hills. For your information, I bought Alleghany Preferred eleven years ago and am just now disposing of it.
As a brand new member of your family, strategically you made a ghastly mistake in sending me individual pictures of the Board of Directors. Mr Roth, Chairman of the Board, merely looks sinister. You, the President, look like a hard worker with not too much on the ball. No one named Prosswimmer can possibly be a success. As for Samuel A. Goldblith, PhD., head of Food Technology at MIT, he looks as though he had eaten too much of the wrong kind of fodder.
At this point I would like to stop and ask you a question about Marion Harper Jr. To begin with, I immediately distrust any man who has the same name as his mother. But the thing that most disturbs me about Junior is that I don't know what the hell he's laughing at. Is it because he sucked me into this Corporation? This is not the kind of face that inspires confidence in a nervous and jittery stockholder.
George S. Sperti, I dismiss instantly. Any man who is the President of an outfit called Institutum Divi Thomae will certainly bear watching. Is he trying to impress stockholders with his knowledge of Latin? If so, why doesn't he read, "Winnie ille Pu"? James J. Sullivan, I am convinced, is Paul E. Prosswimmer photographed from a different angle.
Offhand, I would say that I have summed up your group fairly accurately. I hope, for my sake, that I am mistaken.
In closing, I warn you, go easy with my money. I am in an extremely precarious profession whose livelihood depends upon a fickle public.
Sincerely yours,
Groucho Marx
(temporarialy at liberty)
PS:
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apogee
climber
Technically expert, safe belayer, can lead if easy
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Aug 16, 2016 - 06:39pm PT
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In the context of the subject, I think it's quite classy.
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Peater
Trad climber
Salt Lake City Ut.
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Aug 16, 2016 - 11:40pm PT
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Marx introducing game show players:
And Mr Johnson tell us about yourself:
Well I live in Detroit with my wife and 11 children:
Marx: Hummm, you know I like a good cigar but I take it out of my mouth once in while.
Robert Krumb comics
Zippy is sitting on a rock in the classic thinker pose:
I was just Thinking: ...................... hummm, hummm, hummm,
There it happened again.
Calvin and Hobbs:
Girls are kind of like slugs; they must serve some purpose but it's just hard to imagine what.
(women please don't take offense, or do if you want, just quoting)
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Skeptimistic
Mountain climber
La Mancha
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Aug 17, 2016 - 06:04am PT
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When you were born, the doctor said, "Slap it, and if it doesn't cry, it's a tumor."
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