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bvb
Social climber
flagstaff arizona
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Topic Author's Reply - Feb 2, 2013 - 04:31am PT
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As has been mentioned, vehicular hiccups at Wayne County backcountry crags can, depending on circumstances, rapidly escalate into, well, you know, Epics. Middle-class gold-plated epics to be sure, but they sure can be a spendy distraction at times. For example, consider Exhibit A here: much to my amazement, this field repair (rather bold and ingenious if you ask me) -- reattaching a busted axle mount with strapping tape -- held up for a few miles.
Alas, the effort, despite the Apollo 13 level of creativity, ingenuity and grace under pressure applied to the problem -- was ultimately doomed to failure. So off to Hanksville we go. This totally renegade stand-up hippie biker 'Nam Vet rescue driver and I drank beer all the way from Hanksville to the Coyote Benches, swapping Wayne County war stories and discussing boobs. He was a really cool guy, as are most people from Hanksville. Hanksville is the "town" -- if you can call it that -- where all the truly colorful "downcounty" jack-mormans seem to wind up. This guy saved me $1500 bucks by falsifying his report to Triple AAA, claiming he picked us up on the paved road to Bullfrog marina.
After managing that minor glitch in our weekend with all the skill and panache of t*r on a boob rampage, we got back down to business. I was a bit stressed by all the auto drama -- I don't cope to well with that kind of stuff -- but a quick circuit of easy skankin' on my favorite moderates, along with a few stiff drams of the good stuff and a fistful of xanax, put my whole world right back in perspective. Angels enveloped me within the soft embrace of their celestial feathers as I rode back to camp on a Unicorn that exhaled perfume and trailed a sparkling cloud of glitter in a thousand rainbow hues.
And then the other car took a big old sh#t on us. More scotch, more xanax, no stress, no problem. Just a little duct tape and bailing wire and we're back in business! "Honey, do you think that this Extra-Virgin Olive Oil will work as differential oil?"
Hanna, meanwhile, is starting to question the wisdom of allowing us to parent her. To this day, I assure her that these will someday be cherished memories and hysterically funny storytelling material. When I try to serve up this obviously deranged spin, she rolls her eyes, looks the other way, and cranks the Justin Bieber tune on her iPod up to 11. Nice try, Dad.
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bvb
Social climber
flagstaff arizona
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Topic Author's Reply - Feb 2, 2013 - 05:42am PT
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weezy
climber
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Porphyritic diorite bump. quick cooling makes buttery pockets.
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bvb
Social climber
flagstaff arizona
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Topic Author's Reply - Feb 2, 2013 - 03:17pm PT
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Big Rocks Bump for Krimbing Kontent! The Gym Boulder, in a little area called The Cove. South-facing, sunny, and windless on even the most bitter January days. Perfect spot to kill a couple of spare hours. The Good Stuff. Oh, to be young again...
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Tarbuster
climber
right here, right now
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So you just climb up the sides of them boulders over and over again?
What's that all about.
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weezy
climber
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hell Tarbuster get a load of this...
they always try to climb up the hardest side.. it's the damndest thing
they could just climb up the backside all easy-like but they keep trying to get up the steepest sides
they're strong in the fingers but not so much in the head..
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drljefe
climber
El Presidio San Augustin del Tucson
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...and I guess those little mats are for makin' more babies?
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weezy
climber
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...and I guess those little mats are for makin' more babies?
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bvb
Social climber
flagstaff arizona
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Topic Author's Reply - Feb 2, 2013 - 04:56pm PT
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Thank God somebody else posted to this thread. I was about to give up on it. Figured nobody was reading it.
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socalbolter
Sport climber
Silverado, CA
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No BVB, please keep posting.
I only made one trip (after seeing pictures of Perfect Child), but really enjoyed the variety of options there. We also didn't know what to make of the rock at first - it really is like nothing I've seen anywhere else.
We didn't have any vehicle problems, but I could see how it would be very easy to epic out there.
Wish it was closer...if it was I would have certainly gone back.
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Fritz
Trad climber
Choss Creek, ID
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BVB! I fess up!
Your thread is "12 Thumbs up" & "the cat's g-string!!"
Dooooode!
I am paying special attention, since most all my Utah desert trips have been into SE Utah-------and our SLC buddies just bought a house in Torrey.
Thank you for taking all the time to post those photos and story!
Dooooooode!
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Mees
climber
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I could do w/o the bravado, it's slightly humorous to someone I suppose. the pics and the passion for a cool place, can't get enough, thanks for the stoke, besides it's a climbing thread.
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mechrist
Gym climber
South of Heaven
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they could just climb up the backside all easy-like but they keep trying to get up the steepest sides
Wow, good point! With that beta I suppose there is no need for anyone to haul a bag of toys and their own feces up the side of El Crap.
This thread makes me feel Horny.
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guyman
Social climber
Moorpark, CA.
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BVB... Im' reading it and I am waiting for the "big mad poster to appear" and curse you for spilling the beans.
Looks like a great place to retire.... just hobble up to some boulders and feel stone.
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weezy
climber
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BRAVADO BUMP!!!!!11
WAYNE COUNTY, KIDS .. GET SOME
behold...an autumn's bounty of choss...the temples of the sun and moon.. unclimbed (?)... but closed to climbing
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bvb
Social climber
flagstaff arizona
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Topic Author's Reply - Feb 3, 2013 - 03:35pm PT
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BVB... Im' reading it and I am waiting for the "big mad poster to appear" and curse you for spilling the beans.
Meh, I think those days are over. All of these areas have been massively exposed on the 'web in the last ten years. It's not 1997 anymore. I pulled every single photo posted here off the internet. Do a google search using "images" and you'll see what I mean. There is a new Wayne County climbing guide out. Sponsored climbers have blogged the living daylights out of the Hankries, and getting directions to the place is as simple as conducting a 30 second google search. Hell, I found 'em on my first try following a random comment from a non-climbing co-worker by getting a bunch of 7.5 minute quads, looking at the contour lines, and just driving up there on a day trip with my wife and infant son in tow. Oldest trick in the book. If you have even the slightest degree of exploratory itch, south-central utah has a lifetime's worth of new undiscovered rock.
Since the fire, I've been up there a few times, but it just sort of makes me sad. I get that "it was a time and a place" feeling that you really can't go home again. And since the fire, even the old "regulars", such as they were, have throttled way back. All of these areas can and do and will go months between visitors, and it will always be that way. There's no really comprehesive guide to Wayne county -- the new one is deliberately spartan -- and these places are just too damn hard to get to unless you can see 'em from your kitchen window like I could. And that insanely nice camping scene has turned into something like a night in Beirut.
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bvb
Social climber
flagstaff arizona
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Topic Author's Reply - Feb 3, 2013 - 04:17pm PT
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I could do w/o the bravado
Bravado? ME?!? That is SO unfair, out-of-line, below the belt, and totally unsupported my my posting history here on the Taco. Low-key, self-depriciating humor and humility are my middle names. Actually, my middle name is Donald, but you get the point.
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Off White
climber
Tenino, WA
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I love the fact that the photo above was presented in a court of law in an attempt to deride your character and as evidence of your possible infidelity with the lass in the "background". <snicker>
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bvb
Social climber
flagstaff arizona
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Topic Author's Reply - Feb 3, 2013 - 09:37pm PT
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Really, I should frame it with the Exhibit tag on it and all. It took five years, but at least the ass and I can communicate in a civil fashion these days. Especially when she calls me looking for money. She wants to get back on my Fereral BC/BS healthcare plan.
meanwhile, up in the high country, life goes on...
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