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donini
Trad climber
Ouray, Colorado
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Topic Author's Original Post - Sep 18, 2009 - 12:10pm PT
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A few years out of serving in the US Army Special Forces with the Vietnam War still raging, I was in my first or second season in the Valley. One morning I was in Camp 4 sitting at a picnic table eating breakfast and there happened to be a small hatchet that someone had left lying on the bench next to me. Bev Johnson, the dream woman of many a climber, wandered over, sat down, flashed her gorgeous smile and said, "someone told me you were a Green Beret." For some inexplicable reason, I grabbed the hatchet and threw it over my shoulder- thunk! As blind luck would have it, the hatchet had buried itself perfectly in the tree behind me it's handle still quivering from the impact. I was young but smart enough just to shrug my shoulders and keep my mouth shut.
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rich sims
Trad climber
co
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Sep 18, 2009 - 12:14pm PT
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I heard SF guys are lucky and smart
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jstan
climber
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Sep 18, 2009 - 12:19pm PT
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Of course Bev thought, "Alright! I have this dude right where I want him."
Every time I do this I get told to do it again.
Wonder why that is.
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Reilly
Mountain climber
Monrovia, CA
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Sep 18, 2009 - 12:19pm PT
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No, the really smart one would have licked his eyebrows, and then smiled.
Ps
It works for chamaeleons, doesn't it?
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Reilly
Mountain climber
Monrovia, CA
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Sep 18, 2009 - 12:39pm PT
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Tami,
I meant that demonstration to be the sequel to the hatchet, of course.
ps
It works for chamaeleons, doesn't it?
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Peter Haan
Trad climber
San Francisco, CA
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Sep 18, 2009 - 12:45pm PT
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Donini has always been coy, Pilgrims. And this is the boy who was afraid to make subsequent posts to his own threads six months ago! Obviously more is coming. And I can assure you, since I was there when this one arrived bitd, there IS more to tell. At first it was difficult for Jim though. It took quite awhile for us to get clothes on him and drop the greasepaint and shrunken heads.
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WBraun
climber
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Sep 18, 2009 - 12:46pm PT
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Donini had no clue Peter Hann was walking by in the background drinking his coffee as that sucker whizzed by the back of his head.
Thunk! Hann had an ear infection so heard nothing nor saw nothing.
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Lynne Leichtfuss
Social climber
valley center, ca
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Sep 18, 2009 - 12:49pm PT
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My only question ? How did you know someone was not behind you ? Beginners luck .....:D
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Peter Haan
Trad climber
San Francisco, CA
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Sep 18, 2009 - 02:13pm PT
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cough up Donini. The group wants to hear more of this tale of shame. Either that or Tarbaby and I will run out a full Spring/Summer 2010 line of Donini Signature handbags on ya. Here, this ought to get you to spill the beans.
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scuffy b
climber
Sinatra to Singapore
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Sep 18, 2009 - 02:41pm PT
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Two hours is not much of a wait.
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Toker Villain
Big Wall climber
Toquerville, Utah
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Sep 18, 2009 - 02:44pm PT
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Donini often gives out free samples from his line.
The bad news is that it is usually a model known as the sandbag,..
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survival
Big Wall climber
A Token of My Extreme
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Sep 18, 2009 - 02:49pm PT
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"You're....not going up that river are you....?"
I don't know sir, it's pretty hot out there...that's Charlie's beach..."
"Charlie don't SURF!!!"
"I love the smell of hatchets in the morning. It smells like.....
Victory!"
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Mungeclimber
Trad climber
sorry, just posting out loud.
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Sep 18, 2009 - 02:58pm PT
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ah, but the real test is whether the same trick would work in 2009?
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Brian in SLC
Social climber
Salt Lake City, UT
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Sep 18, 2009 - 03:00pm PT
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Probably not. Leather pants and a slackline work, rumor has...
-Brian in SLC
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Jaybro
Social climber
Wolf City, Wyoming
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Sep 18, 2009 - 03:07pm PT
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Did he get cited for defacing a tree? Them dam greenies!
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donini
Trad climber
Ouray, Colorado
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Topic Author's Reply - Sep 18, 2009 - 03:33pm PT
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Ah! the rest of the story...hmmmm. I guess you all know alpinist are renowned for their short memories.
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Roger Breedlove
climber
Cleveland Heights, Ohio
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Sep 18, 2009 - 03:33pm PT
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"I was young but smart enough..." apparently only occurred after Jim had established his skill in winging hatchets over his shoulder.
Bev had large and very pretty eyes, besides letting in a lot of light and waylaying boys, she could also roll them every so slightly. She was unflappable, but I cannot guess what her response to Jim would have been.
Now, if I had flung a hatchet over my shoulder in camp (no way it would have stuck in a tree), I think she would have had me crawling in the dirt for forgiveness.
Good tale, Jim. We all get to make up our own middle and end.
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Captain...or Skully
Social climber
Idaho, also. Sorta, kinda mostly, Yeah.
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Sep 18, 2009 - 03:34pm PT
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Concur.
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Alan Rubin
climber
Amherst,MA.
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Sep 18, 2009 - 04:50pm PT
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"alpinists are renowned for their short memories"---didn't Maestri try that one, Jim?
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jstan
climber
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Sep 18, 2009 - 05:21pm PT
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Alright I will part with my only Bev story. She was walking behind me when I came to a boulder step up near my waist. As I put my foot up on the boulder and stood up on it she muttered,
"Shit!"
I never had many victories, but that was one.
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