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zip
Trad climber
pacific beach, ca
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Topic Author's Original Post - Oct 25, 2007 - 12:23am PT
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I have a lot of women that i am involved with that i have very intimate relationships with. When i say intimate, i mean in an intellectual, and spiritual sense, but there is no romance, or sexual contact involved.
These women are good friends of mine and we have great conversations. We don't always agree on everything, but we all agree on one thing, when you cross the line from friend to lover, things sure do change.
Sometimes it is for the better, and some times it really messes things up, and i can't really think of a rational reason why.
When i was young, i was rather promiscuous, and didn't really feel that sex was that big of a deal. There was no emotion, or passion, it was just a physical thing.
I felt that women needed a reason, and men just needed a place.
Yes, i was shallow, and superficial, but i was just a uninformed kid.
And then, i fell in love. OH MY!, does that change your world.
To make love, to the women you love, now that is a beautiful thing.
I have only been in love the one time, but hope that there is a chance that lightning might strike again.
I do feel there is hope, because i spend more time fantasizing about being in love, than making love.
From my conversations with my female friends, and my own research, here are the big four that women have to have in any relationship:
Honesty - no explanation necessary
Sensitivity, with strength - you can be sensitive without being a sissy
Sincerity - don't say it, unless you really mean it
Respect - no explanation necessary
These are the deal breakers.
Everything else is open to compromise, but without these, you got nothing.
Oh yeah, one more thing, why do people have bad sex? I really don't get this part. If you are in love with someone, shouldn't you make good love to them?
Any idiot can buy his lady some flowers, take her out to dinner, or buy her some jewelry. This is nice, but so what. All it takes is a little money and time to do that stuff.
If you really want to show her that you love her, then make good love to her. If you don't know what makes her feel good, then ask her. If she doesn't know, then find out, talk to her, and just have fun. TAKE YOUR TIME! talk and touch them softly
Somewhere i read that a foot massage and brushing a woman's hair slowly might be the key to a woman's heart, but that is uncharted territory for me.
Ok, well that is enough from me.
Maybe one of you ladies out here can tell me what woman really want.
I am going to go bed right now and fantasize about:
being in love
making love
breakfast
winning the lotto
climbing with Crimpie
Zip
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yo
climber
The Eye of the Snail
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Oct 25, 2007 - 12:25am PT
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zip = Cal Ripken
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L
climber
The cinders of California...
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Oct 25, 2007 - 12:36am PT
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Zip,
You are too funny! The fact that you even ask is 10 points in your favor right off the bat.
Foot massages--20 points
Running your fingers through the hair (not a brush, silly!)--10 points
Great sense of humor--50 points
Loves the outdoors--75 points
Loves animals--50 points
Hopelessly romantic--30 points
Cares about others (as in not self-absorbed)--priceless
That's a start. Good luck figuring us out...heh-heh-heh!
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Standing Strong
Trad climber
go gadget go
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Oct 25, 2007 - 12:49am PT
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arn't BOTH people responsible for good sex? doesn't it take two to (horizontal) tango?
communication = key
this is the number one most impt. thing for me, in or out of bed. no bullsh*t. i don't want someone who reverses everything i say in order to avoid discussing things that should be discussed. no bullsh*t like refusing to put a label on things but saying you don't want to date anyone else and that you don't want me to, but then advertising yourself online as single and then getting mad at me for asking you what's up so i can decide how i feel and make my own plans, even tho i'm totally mellow stylee like, "i know you have a lot going on and that's cool. i respect where you're coming from. but when you say this, and then i see this, i feel confused, so could you clarify for me so i can understand how you feel about this right now?"
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WBraun
climber
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Oct 25, 2007 - 01:04am PT
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They want to know what's on sale .......
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Shack
Big Wall climber
Reno NV
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Oct 25, 2007 - 01:15am PT
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"Honesty - no explanation necessary
Sensitivity, with strength - you can be sensitive without being a sissy
Sincerity - don't say it, unless you really mean it
Respect - no explanation necessary"
I agree with Riley, women always say they want these things,
and then end up going out with the tattooed guy on the Harley!
Go figure.
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Jaybro
Social climber
The West
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Oct 25, 2007 - 01:18am PT
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I'd get married again, I think, a few details to work out first.
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Robb
Social climber
Pick Up Truck Heaven
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Oct 25, 2007 - 01:20am PT
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It's all about sacrificing your life for your loved one's & it must be mutual. Far & away the ones who are successful are those who have commited to this life long challenge......die to self to serve another. I've seen many, but few who lasted based on anything else.
IMHO: 26th anniversary last Sept.
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Raydog
Trad climber
Boulder Colorado
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Oct 25, 2007 - 01:23am PT
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I'm lookin for a gal with a big bag of weed...
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Shack
Big Wall climber
Reno NV
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Oct 25, 2007 - 01:25am PT
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Bwahahahahaha!
Funny Ray!
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Jaybro
Social climber
The West
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Oct 25, 2007 - 01:37am PT
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dynamic equilbrium
60/40 on some things
45/55 on others
some field might be 50/50
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Jello
Social climber
No Ut
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Oct 25, 2007 - 01:39am PT
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Not to be objectified, but treated with respect for who they are.
-JelloDoesn'tReallyKnowMuchInThisRegard
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marky
climber
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Oct 25, 2007 - 01:46am PT
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This thread is beyond stupid. I lost several IQ points just skimming through it.
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Standing Strong
Trad climber
go gadget go
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Oct 25, 2007 - 01:54am PT
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dating is stoooopit. i just wanna be buddies like when we were kids and climbed trees and played tag and in the sandbox and stuff. why can't it just be as easy as when we were kids????
u know, like... "let's go ride bikes!"
"in third grade we used to laugh a lot, we made pictures with glitter and gluuuuue"
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Standing Strong
Trad climber
go gadget go
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Oct 25, 2007 - 01:58am PT
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marky, are u one of those people who hates everything everyone else likes cuz it makes u feel superior?
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Jaybro
Social climber
The West
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Oct 25, 2007 - 02:01am PT
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But Lois, that implies that there is one field overriding the rest; what is that most important field? I honestly don't know what your answer means. I see it as complimenary combinations of strengths and weaknesses making a whole.
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Standing Strong
Trad climber
go gadget go
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Oct 25, 2007 - 02:03am PT
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lois, did you just say that i should sleep w/someone if he buys me dinner?
i am not interested in dating someone who isn't also a student, and who isn't from the same socioeconomic background. been there, done that, too weird. it's better if both partners are equal.
you know, it's funny, i sometimes want to get mad about some situations but later i realize that some things wern't just me or him. looking at charts of who ends up together showed me that we had so many things so totally against us.
we were over before we started. good try tho.
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Shack
Big Wall climber
Reno NV
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Oct 25, 2007 - 02:03am PT
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I'm no expert on what women want but I'll bet that somewhere
on their secret "real" list would be multiple orgasms.
Just a hunch.
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Jaybro
Social climber
The West
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Oct 25, 2007 - 02:05am PT
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shack -chuckle
Lois, I don't think that would have worked (flat out would not fly) in any relationsip I've been in; if one person always gives-in significantly more than the other, that will inevitably lead to resentment, there has to be another part of the relationship where it's getting made up to the 'giver.' otherwise; that person is an enabler.
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