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Mighty Hiker
Social climber
Vancouver, B.C.
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Topic Author's Original Post - May 16, 2007 - 03:23pm PT
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The SuperTopo Etiquette Committee met recently, at a secret location somewhere near XXXXXFest. Many of the usual suspects were present, at least physically. After tea and crumpets, the inmates got down to business. Not business as usual - all sharp or heavy objects had been removed, there was no internet access, and as a special honour they were wearing Etiquette Committee (straight)jackets. A spell checker and thesaurus were present in case of an emergency that Radical couldn’t handle, and Largo provided security, backed by Crimpergirl’s attack parrots.
A. Crowley began by whining incessantly, mostly about themselves. They were asked to go away in a corner, discuss it, and get back to us. They’re still at it, but there was consensus that the quiet time should do them some good.
Mighty Hiker, in an unCanadian moment, snarked that he’d rather listen to mosquitoes than to A. Crowley.
STANDING*STRONG texted: PLAY NICE.STOP.YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO BE GROWNUPS.STOP.WISH I WAS THERE AND YOU WEREN’T.STOP.PICTURE WITH STUNNA SHADES TO FOLLOW.STOP.
locker was having trouble with his return bar, and couldn’t quite get to the point. He was clearly enjoying himself, though.
EKat was her usual ebullient self, and said “Whatever floats your boats.” Blinny provided musical accompaniment.
‘Pass the Pitons’ Pete stated that he didn’t do meetings, or walls, that took less than two weeks.
Karl Baba, as always, remarked “Peace!” This was referred to the Morals & Ethics Committee.
DaftRat had difficulty with the peace thing, and muttered about the life of humans being nasty, brutish and short. “There’s a reason the place is called Megiddo”, he snapped.
Matt cheerily remarked “STFU!” A United Nations human rights body will be consulted as to effective regulation of such rudeness.
I’m Rick James, B was ruled disordered, or out of order, or something like that.
Jody showed a series of stunning mountain photos, some historic, but lost his audience when he started to rant about the argument from design.
nature, Brutus, Nurse R, and Piton Ron provided sushi, and were voted “committee members most likely to do something useful, instead of standing around yapping”. Mother Nature was added to this sub-committee.
A technical committee was formed, made up of Russ W, jstan, Ed H and Werner B, to scientifically test all hypotheses with the latest in high-tech funkness devices.
JB poked his head through a window, as he traversed the outside of the asylum. He said “Funkness is my department, you idiots!”
Hardman Knott, Raydog, and Trad is Good were preoccupied with a discussion of what to do with Bill. The most likely option was defenestration.
tarbuster provided fine hats. Sadly, there weren’t enough to go around - Moosie accidentally sat on one, and #46 wore another and pretended to be Smokey.
LEB chided “Children, children. I go away for a few minutes, and look what happens. Can’t you ever behave? Now, about my black skwirrrls…”
Chicken Skinner was busy with the Yosemite Climbing Museum and the Facelift, but said “You’re welcome to have another meeting in the Valley sometime soon. September 26th – 30th, say. Even a politician could talk and use a litter stick at the same time.”
healyje said “We’re walking a fine line. Watch me walk this one right here, with more skill and less fuss than those poseurs in Camp 4.”
Jello’s experience herding cats was thought likely to be of particular help. When he stepped out for a moment, he was elected chair.
In the meantime, blackbird, Crimpergirl, Largo, reddirt, Susan P, Jennie, Long Ago, mal d, Janet, and Anastasia sat quietly, occasionally exchanging meaningful looks, and notes. They interrupted dirtineye’s presentation on herding cats, namely Kittimus, to say: “The meeting is adjourned. The minutes show that the members unanimously agree that in future, the citizens of SuperTopia will:
 Think before posting.
Not jump to conclusions.
Say and do unto others as you would have them say and do unto you.
Ensure that the title of a thread fairly reflects its subject.
Refrain from wicked highjacking and other antisocial shenanigans.
Honour the wish of our host and benefactor, that SuperTopia be (mostly) climbing-related.
Have fun!”
Fluoride, camera in hand, simply said “Film at 11:00. YouTube at 11:01.” Ouch! Was furiously working on a sketch of the sordid scene, and hoped to scoop her.
(Apologies to those included, or not included.)
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bluering
Trad climber
Santa Clara, Ca.
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May 16, 2007 - 03:28pm PT
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Ha, funny and appropriate.
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climbrunride
Trad climber
Durango, CO
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May 16, 2007 - 03:32pm PT
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Excellent TR! Thank you.
But I thought you said it was spell-checked. What's with that extra "u" in "honor"? (Never mind - I think my Google language translator was off.)
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Mighty Hiker
Social climber
Vancouver, B.C.
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Topic Author's Reply - May 16, 2007 - 04:54pm PT
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Wee spel mannee tings difrently in da Grate Wite Nort, eh?
Actually, most English-speaking Canadians use English spellings for words (labour, honour, etc), rather American spelling. It's all the fault of people like Colonel McCormick of the Chicago Tribune, who wanted to reform spelling.
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Karl Baba
Trad climber
Yosemite, Ca
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May 16, 2007 - 04:57pm PT
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Hey wait a minute. I wasn't there! Did somebody sign in under my name and flame (or sooth) people claiming to be me?
Did I borrow any money or eat raw fish on credit?
Hope not!'
;-0
karl
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climbrunride
Trad climber
Durango, CO
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May 16, 2007 - 04:59pm PT
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I actually appreciate that. I am one of those unpopular, anal ones who still prefers the use of proper spelling, grammer, etc. (Even if you folks do still like the imperial form of the language.)
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Anastasia
Trad climber
California
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May 19, 2007 - 02:06am PT
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Wow Anders,
This is so well written that I almost remember the meeting!
You definitely know us for you have well represented our characters.
Sending Big Smiles,
AF
P.S.
Karl,
Don't feel bad for not being at the meeting.
You were still in India seeking that perfect shot. I know that when you do get around to posting it, that picture will enlighten all of us.
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Mighty Hiker
Social climber
Vancouver, B.C.
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Topic Author's Reply - May 19, 2007 - 04:22pm PT
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For the unschooled, such as myself, Judith Martin = Miss Manners. I wonder if she eats, shoots, and leaves?
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Jaybro
Social climber
The West
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May 19, 2007 - 04:57pm PT
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Nice, ewe rok even if yew use that funnie speling.
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johnx01
Trad climber
UK
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May 19, 2007 - 05:46pm PT
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MH
Nice post, as an occasional visitor, I've always loved this place, after all look at 'Daryl's Daughter', the Stonemaster's, the general level of integrity and humanity, that is in fact pretty rare. I've enjoyed teasing LEB, mind games with DMT, Tarbuster's literary poise and elegance is astounding, Matt funny as f*#k. Jaybro's solidness, dirt's dirtiness - fantastic.
BUT -- there's a weird funk about this place now, you guy's aren't as playful as you were, and that's sad. I hope what's been round, comes round again. As Joe Strummer say's "Without people, you're nothing" Get the CD and listen to Track 24 again and again......
'peace
-karl'
Naa - John actually, f*#k you, I didn't break this world, it was this way when I found it!'
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reddirt
climber
a view looking westward
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May 19, 2007 - 09:31pm PT
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Anders that was *great*!
a visual of this scene outta occupy Ouch! for a long long long time.
proofreading can sometimes be the
for keyboard dysentery; efficacy varies...
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Raydog
Trad climber
Boulder Colorado
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May 19, 2007 - 11:01pm PT
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zeeeerrh dahlink - now dats vut I'm talkink abOOUUt!
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