I was wronged by a man 3-4 years ago. He was the first guy I had sex with, I fell in love with him, and I was hurt really badly and unfairly. I was involved with him for a while. The pain from it was nothing I had ever experienced before. I did not feel any need to go off on him and make accusations for what he did wrong publicly, and he is known in the climbing community. It could have damaged his reputation big time.

Smearing someones name out in the public just because you have personal issues and a personal grudge against them is just distasteful, this stuff should be discussed privately.

The first time I met matt was this past July, and this was only for a 2.5 month stretch. Oftentimes, I would have to take a break from him for reasons I will not share because I will not bash someone in public. Luckily, things started shaping up a bit better towards the end of his stay, we spent 2 consecutive weeks in Arizona having a blast. I never led him on sexually. Before I met him, I never sent him a single sexual pic, I never talked "dirty" with him online. I simply stated "I will have to meet with you first to see if there is any interest." I knew in my head that there was a clear incompatibility with the education discrepancy between us, and I did point that out to him on more than one ocassion and how this could be a serious problem.

After meeting him, I have repeatedly stated to him very clearly that I am not interested in him sexually, but I can keep climbing with him. Even the first week of having met, I never made any sexual gestures to him, I never flirted with him, I never made any physical contact, I established clear boundaries in the FIRST week he was here. I gave him the option of taking off and spending his vacation with other friends. He repeatedly insisted that he only wants to climb with me, telling me "I'd rather climb with you." The only thing I have criticized about him is his level of education and questionable language competency in written/verbal expression.

I was never "involved" with Matt (aka the kiwi dude), like I was with my ex who wronged me so badly. I was enraged, my ex was my first and my world shattered to pieces from the pain, he hurt me so bad. Still, I did not feel the need to start public campaign against him to "take him down", to "get revenge". We talked considerably in private to the best of our abilities to try to "resolve our issues".

Passion, whether it is of the positive or negative kind, is passion and it has a burning desire to be expressed. I can't blame Matt for having passions, but going so far as making false accusations about me is just taking things too far.

I can get further into such things as mental distortions-ex.// denial, delusion. But the place for this is a private 50 min session in a private practice setting with a licensed therapist, for however long is deemed appropriate, NOT the internet forums.

stalker dude is creepy..

Wait, they make bourbon in cans?

Lesson learned: Don't invite random dudes from across the planet to live with you for extended periods. You think?

I never came on here to start talking trash about anyone or to complain about anything.