would you have sex in church?

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fear

Ice climber

hartford, ct

Jun 20, 2007 - 02:53pm PT

Lol... this is too funny.....

Having sex in a Catholic church that was actually created by a young girl gettin' banged and knocked up by good 'ol Joe. Hey, he did eventually marry her. You've got to give him credit for that. Sure she made up a little "fib" that started 2000 years of fables and myth. Can't blame her for not wanting to get stoned to death...

Oh... sh#t... wait.... that makes sense... I'll stop.

But no... I wouldn't now. You know some of those priests have tiny little webcams all over.....

-Fear

Loomis

climber

Blava nie, ty kokot!

Jun 20, 2007 - 09:50pm PT

While living in Czech and Slovak republic's, I would use the churches regularly on warm summer nights and cold winter days. European churches are so romantic, great architecture and many hidden places to play "Hide the klobasa"

Ouch!

climber

Jun 20, 2007 - 10:19pm PT

"Hey, is that LEB?"

This is Shack's or Fish's concept from back when they dressed her like a nun.

Karl Baba

Trad climber

Yosemite, Ca

Jun 20, 2007 - 11:28pm PT

I have no choice but to have sex in church.

The human heart holds more Spirit than any building. Trying to exclude God from Sex is like trying to hide from yourself.

Peace

Karl

Standing Strong

Trad climber

look around look around, tell me what you've found

Topic Author's Reply - Jun 21, 2007 - 03:25am PT

well, to be honest i feel like sexual pleasure is everyone's birthright. if the mood struck our fancy whilst exploring a cathedral and we ignored it i'd feel guilty for extinguishing a magic that should never be ignored.

Karl Baba

Trad climber

Yosemite, Ca

Jun 21, 2007 - 11:20am PT

If you're not a priest, the church might turn you in SS.

Might make for an interesting story in the paper to add your mystery!

If you get caught having sex in public, is it some kind of Sex offense? Do you have to register as an offender?

Would be kind of nice to know. I got sort of caught having sex in church (well, it was a rock in the middle of the South Fork of the Merced) years back. A group of Yosemite Institute kids and teacher had hiked up the river and saw nature in action.

peace

Karl

coiler

Trad climber

yosemite

Jun 21, 2007 - 11:37am PT

Church?... How Savage! People are still holding on to those barbaric stories of magic, smoke and mirrors. How quaint. I know they are still trying to shove it down my throat! I wish they would stop. Oh, back to your question... Yeah, a church is just as good as anywhere else; sturdy wooden benches, mood candles, secret little "confesionals"... Yeah Baby!!

Jennie

Trad climber

Salt Lake

Jun 21, 2007 - 01:36pm PT

"This thread kicks ass! A topic (most) everyone agrees on."

Raimit,

Your archbishop or whoever needs to throw ice cold Holy Water on your pubescent lap. If you really believe EVERYONE agrees with this nonsense you're more naive than I thought. As I recall, Locker just said "no" which is the smartest answer on the entire thread. Oli gave the same answer and why. But Ament is one of the big dogs and ST ers only address the big dogs when they're flattering or kissing up to them. But it was obvious Pat wasn't in the mood for holding court, so you waited for a straw man or woman you could go off on.

Most everyone you say? You might want to note regular ST posters who elected not to post here.

"Some believe the whole earth is “sacred”. Uh-oh! Where do you go then?"

That's real genius. I'm sure you were the first pilgrim to come up with THAT! The sacredness of church is just one aspect of the equation, the sanctuary of a chapel is also SET APART for a specific purpose. Your parents likely set apart various parts of the household for specific purposes. Did your folks customarily have sex on the dining room table????.....Probably not..... Neither is a chapel set apart for sexual relations.

"Sorry, Jen , but it looks like you’re a little out of sync with the group opinion. Do you really believe your god is offended by “sex acts” on church premises? (Or maybe you’re just getting “perverse excitement “ from going against popular opinion.

But are you really being honest with yourself? …..Are you really suggesting you’d pass up the right right moment with the right person because of some preacher contrived idea about what “space” is too sacred for making love?

Perverse excitement? Popular opinion? The only perverse excitement I'm getting is laughing at you being led on by the other sheep. Sheep are animals that are without exception dominated by a group instinct. They do everything together, when one eats they all eat, when one drinks they all drink, and when one lays down to chew its cud they all do. When one panics, all of them panic, unlike humans where that can only be said to be true of a majority of anyone group. However, just like humans, sheep are easily fooled. When they are fooled all of them are fooled.

They are also easily herded. You can practically herd them into the mouths of coyotes.

They are also one of the dumbest animals on the planet. Count me as especially stupid for thinking I could walk contrary to the direction of the flock.

So go ahead and have your sex in church. You could even start your own church flock dedicated to your "divine" purposes. A cottage industry and religion all rolled into one. I'd recommend Nevada where it's easy to set up a chapel and to employ women. Devout pilgrims would flock in from all over the country to experience the glories of "in church" sex.

Best of luck, be sure to count your sheep and keep them away from coyotes and stray dogs. And have a glee filled and gloating afternoon.

scuffy b

climber

Bates Creek

Jun 21, 2007 - 01:48pm PT

I'd be interested to see how I'd answer if the situation actually
came up, which seems somewhat unlikely.
Would I have a strong opinion then?
I guess it might depend how crowded the church is.

rectorsquid

climber

Lake Tahoe

Jun 21, 2007 - 04:25pm PT

Gods sees me having sex everywhere else. Why not a church?

Anyhow, people build churches for people. God doesn't give a s**t about them.

Dave

coiler

Trad climber

yosemite

Jun 28, 2007 - 08:20pm PT

Christians invade our lives every day. They tell us; no abotions, no booze, no homosexuality (I'm perfectly staight by the way),and the biggie... If I don't believe in their religion, HAW HAW, I'm going to THEIR hell!!! Whatafrikkin JOKE. Now, I'm just using these things as an example to get "Jennie" (and all the other "sheep")straight on how Christians invade everyone elses lives every day. Why Shouldn't we go into thier churches and get it on with my lady? They don't respect anyone elses rights!

dirtbag

climber

Jun 28, 2007 - 08:29pm PT

Yup, I would.

Besides...is there a better place to scream "Oh God!" than in a church?

bluering

Trad climber

Santa Clara, Ca.

Jun 28, 2007 - 09:07pm PT

For God's sake....get a room! Do you really need to mock religion that badly? Go fuc$ somewhere in private, if you really need an audience, go to a park and get arrested for it. Oh, the decay of our society......ANIMALS!!!!

Mimi

climber

Jun 28, 2007 - 09:25pm PT

I don't give a rat's ass what you believe in for the most part as long as you're not a criminal, but for all of you sincerely irreverant posters that are PC in any other category, your anti-Christian/churchgoer comments reek of hypocrisy. But I guess payback is a beotch for all those centuries of inquisition. I am of the opinion that most of you are being outrageous and just kidding around.

I have to ask (without starting a new thread) all you churchplukers, would you also jump to do it on a marble slab in a graveyard? I have to assume that would be a resounding yes. Apparently, graveyards are much more popular for this activity.

dirtbag

climber

Jun 28, 2007 - 09:31pm PT

What's the big deal--as long as you don't spill any luv gravy on the pews?

Mimi

climber

Jun 28, 2007 - 09:37pm PT

If you're addressing me dirtbag...I don't think I know you from the old days, so I don't have a good sense of your character past a point. Would you answer a fundamental question for me? Do you have respect for certain symbols at this time in your life?