Discussion Topic |
|
This thread has been locked |
tradmanclimbs
Ice climber
Pomfert VT
|
|
|
Feb 20, 2012 - 07:39pm PT
|
LEB take to annother thread please.. this one is for us recovering drunks.
|
|
ms55401
Trad climber
minneapolis, mn
|
|
|
Feb 20, 2012 - 07:40pm PT
|
yes, delete the LEB account, it's an unwelcome irritant
|
|
bvb
Social climber
flagstaff arizona
|
|
|
Feb 20, 2012 - 07:44pm PT
|
We'll save a cup of coffee for you, Rox!
|
|
neebee
Social climber
calif/texas
|
|
|
Feb 20, 2012 - 07:53pm PT
|
hey there, say, happiegrrl.... sorry imissed something here...
hope you are feeling betterm through all of this situations...
god bless, you are in my prayers,
:)
|
|
tradmanclimbs
Ice climber
Pomfert VT
|
|
|
Feb 20, 2012 - 07:55pm PT
|
Rox, are you a member of AA? Aspiring alcoholics? I know I certainly used to be;)
|
|
happiegrrrl
Trad climber
www.climbaddictdesigns.com
|
|
|
Feb 20, 2012 - 08:03pm PT
|
OH STOP - EVERYONE!
We'll all be posting drunk together by the end of the day if we don't (AA) practice our principals.
Lois- This thread has evolved as a place where alcoholics come to help others alcoholics. That is why I am here. I need my alcoholic buddies on this. Even the drinking ones. It's like they are the disruptive ones in the back of an AA meeting, reeking of liquor, and when they ask if anyone is counting days, stand up and announce they have like 2 hours *sober*....hahahah
I don't want to be rude to you, Lois, but clinical "therapeutics" are not what I came here for. You are a lay person, and so that might seem strange to you. But I can tell you it is the fact.
And this thread is not about me. It just happens that I am the current one in pain. You can not know this, but there are a LOT of lurkers, people struggling, who read this thread and find solace in it.
Because of your combatitive style, when attacked, some people who may be MUCH more dire straits than me, might be having a negative reaction. I beg you - lurk if you will, but ssssshhhh. Leave the bulk of the posting to the drunks.
I'm going to be okay - so long as I keep connected. This thread is one of those connections, but if it is derailed into sh#t, it will become useless, and not just to me. It would be very painful for me to feel it was my troubles that got this thread turned into sh#t.
As for drinking - My risk is nearly nonexistent right now(I can never be totally safe, of course). Two AA meetings under my belt, and the help from some in this thread, and I feel like the pain, difficult as it is, is tolerable. But I have a ways to go. This is deep-seated stuff, and I am as if walking down a very long tunnel right now.
But I am walking. I am not curled up in a dark corner of the tunnel wailing. That may happened tonight, when I wake up at 3am. That is what happened last night. I had so many dreams that were just HORRIBLE that related to what I am going through. To me, that is a sure sign that I am not "making it up," this trouble.
But the meetings, and people here, helped and will be helpful.
On an aside, or back to topic actually, the Woman's meeting I went to today, in Yucca Valley was REALLY good. What an amazing difference from the one the night before.
Last night the majority of people had just a few months of sobriety, and halfway through the meeting, a woman with "more time" than most the rest came in loudly hauling a guy half her age....who, shared that he had a few hours sober... There were two couples in the meeting, who were hugging each other on and off during the meeting. Sorta odd.
Today there was a good 20 women of all ages, and from 30 days sober to one who was a kid during prohibition! Many really sober women in the group, with strong, healthy emotional sobriety. Phew!
|
|
Ian Gill
Big Wall climber
Redding, CA
|
|
|
Feb 20, 2012 - 08:20pm PT
|
Happie - I don't know you, as I don't post regularly on the taco. But in 8 days, I'll have 15 months sober. As I was ever the rebel, it took me @ 18 years of in and out, with each relapse worse than the last. I was once sober for 6 1/2 years, with no AA and no program. So of course my mind told me I was okay, I mean, I must have been, because look how long I made it! That was the beginning of the end - picking up again. "Normies" have no comprehension, nor should they, of the absolute hell and demoralization us alcoholics go thru, or have been thru. I truly wanted to just off myself.
So it was only with total surrender to the program that I found total strength again. I feel your pain in your words - and in my experience, a number of long time sobriety (like yourself)AA friends I know have gone through the same thing you're feeling - after many years of sobriety. That's when you get back to the basics, they say, and it passes.
Every day you don't drink you're a winner!!
And remember that today is the most important day in your life, because it's the only day you've got.
Largo had great advice earlier - SERVICE. Service helped me save my ass. And more importantly, it got me out of my own head. I don't know about you, but my alcoholic mind is my worst enemy - if I let it be!
S**t happens in sobriety, as you're all too aware of. But at least I don't feel any desire to drink about it any more. Just keep it up, girl, suit up and show up - you're stronger than you know!
|
|
happiegrrrl
Trad climber
www.climbaddictdesigns.com
|
|
|
Feb 20, 2012 - 08:37pm PT
|
THANKS Ian!
|
|
Dr.Sprock
Boulder climber
I'm James Brown, Bi-atch!
|
|
|
Feb 20, 2012 - 08:48pm PT
|
they just found out that alcohol contains iridium and cobalt isotopes,
just another reason to avoid the poison,
make that cop in the rear view mirror a loser instead of you,
save money, be happy,
|
|
Ian Gill
Big Wall climber
Redding, CA
|
|
|
Feb 20, 2012 - 09:12pm PT
|
You can not know this, but there are a LOT of lurkers, people struggling, who read this thread and find solace in it.
RIGHT ON! This is so true. I actually posted to this thread probably around 400 posts ago. But as someone who has recently beaten cancer, AND alcohol (so far, you know how that goes - I guess I SHOULD say "has no desire to take a drink today"), at age 53, I've decided I've been given this 2nd (and 3rd, and 4th..) chance at life again, and I'm going to celebrate by soloing a route on El Cap this spring. I haven't been on El Cap in 26 years and have never soloed - but one of the posters on this thread is teaching me ALL the tips and tricks for old farts like myself.
But I digress.....
The point I was gonna make is that I was REALLY comforted to see this post on the taco, and to know there were so many other climbers just like me. You know how you can walk into a new meeting where you don't know ANYONE, but still feel comfortable and at ease? It was the same when I found this post! Cuz dammit, I need it! LOL!
|
|
Norwegian
Trad climber
Placerville, California
|
|
|
Feb 20, 2012 - 09:19pm PT
|
the tears and the smiles,
the wealth and the freedoms,
the health and the disease,
they all roll recklessless down
the mountains that are mine life.
i've not one regret for any of my decisions.
many of them have been horrible.
i would not change one thing or else
that one thing changed would rob me of me.
im complete.
toxins. vegetables. sex.
mastrabation. love. emotional disasters.
im everything i've ever been.
and that is fine with me.
i've headaches. and vomitting.
i've debts. and enemies.
i've scars. and memories.
these all are exactly of me.
many more await.
i'll stumble and fall.
i'll rise and stride once more.
for ever as ever understands itself.
when i accept a reality and attempt to
preserve it; when i achieve grace and
wellness;
when i determine who i am,
and stop letting i fall thru me,
it is then that i'm dead.
though i may be walking,
and climbing and astonishing,
and flowing, and beautiful
upon all of the doctors charts,
im still just a void where
i once was.
gawdamn disease malcontents me and mine,
but im better than jesus in that i arise,
again and again and again
from dead.
i'll see tomorrow tomorrow,
though i know not what it'll be,
i'll meet it with myself
and all's my offenses and defenses.
im a father and
a husband
and a provider
to all of these love's im accountable.
i'll also balance my own soul's excesses.
and we'll all smile and frown
and have a real life party.
damn,
the moment just overflowed and
now i've made a potent mess,
|
|
xtrmecat
Big Wall climber
Kalispell, Montanagonia
|
|
|
Feb 20, 2012 - 10:13pm PT
|
Haapi,
Don't know you, but know you well. If you know what I mean. When the squirrel cage gets running, help someone else. As stated above, service. It is what saves my butt almost daily. That and staying connected via the 11th.
I am on the road, and only get a meeting a month on average. Sorry you are on tough times, I was shaky for the last month, until I was able to go home and recenter. Just stay plugged in and do the next indicated thing. If you do not know what that is, keep posting, and the others will surely point it out for you.
No room for our egos in sobriety, gotta let go, and let . You know.
What ever pains you today, can and probably will make you stronger out the back end.
And congrats to all the milestones posted since I last posted, you guys deserve all the happiness available to you.
Burly Bob
|
|
Anxious Melancholy
Mountain climber
Between the Depths of Despair & Heights of Folly
|
|
|
Feb 21, 2012 - 12:37pm PT
|
Just haven't been able to stick with the program. Sober up for a few days, weeks, months, then slip right back to sucking suds. Go to lots of meetings, then a few meeting, work some steps, then falter. Think i just might need to check myself in and take a break from my day to day routine, seems like I've tried many other alternatives, except this one. Any suggestions for a rehab house in the San Diego area that still allows you to work your day job?
|
|
happiegrrrl
Trad climber
www.climbaddictdesigns.com
|
|
|
Feb 21, 2012 - 01:02pm PT
|
Anxious Meloncholy - The local AA Intergroup can probably advise you on the options in your area. Here's the info:
San Diego Central Office
7075 Mission Gorge Road, Suite B
San Diego, CA 92120
(619) 265-8762
(24 hours a day)
Office Hours: Mo-Sat
9am-5pm
http://aasandiego.org/
Just wondering - and it's none of my business, so feel free to ignore - but is there s reason you would want to still be at the work during this time for yourself, and not get into a full-time rehab? This may be something to discuss with the people at you intergroup(I can see why you may not want to publicly on the internet here).
If, for example, it is a concern over losing income, find out if the law requires the company continue your pay - as sick leave, disability or some other measure. If it is that you run your own company and a month away would totally kill it - there may still be a way to keep things going, if you have assistants who can be trusted. Sometimes, when we are in it, we can't see our options clearly.
Plenty of people DO find a way through, using the halfway places. It may be just the ticket for you! But man, oh man, how I WISH I had taken that month in a rehab - just for the break from the pressure! At times in early sobriety, I have waxed philosophic that I wished I would relapse now that I knew how much a rehab in-house was like, from hearing others tell about their time there - hahaha.
|
|
Jaybro
Social climber
Wolf City, Wyoming
|
|
|
Feb 21, 2012 - 02:07pm PT
|
Rox you gotta learn to stop after the first couple sentences
|
|
bergbryce
Mountain climber
South Lake Tahoe, CA
|
|
|
Feb 21, 2012 - 02:22pm PT
|
If you've got nothing to offer to people struggling with drinking, you need to get out of this thread.
|
|
Elcapinyoazz
Social climber
Joshua Tree
|
|
|
Feb 21, 2012 - 02:26pm PT
|
If you've got nothing to offer to people struggling with drinking, you need to get out of this thread.
+1.
|
|
Hardman Knott
Gym climber
Muir Woods National Monument, Mill Valley, Ca
|
|
|
Feb 21, 2012 - 02:32pm PT
|
If you've got nothing to offer to people struggling with drinking, you need to get out of this thread.
+2.
|
|
Dr.Sprock
Boulder climber
I'm James Brown, Bi-atch!
|
|
|
Feb 21, 2012 - 02:34pm PT
|
if you see somebody in a dangerous position because of booze,
ie: your best friend looks like death warmed over but you give them tough love and they die, this is not a good outcome for either of you,
move in with somebody if you have to, whatever it takes to save their life, because you will miss them for the rest of your life,
sunday sermon over now have some coffee and read the funnies.
|
|
Mark Hudon
Trad climber
Hood River, OR
|
|
|
Feb 21, 2012 - 02:35pm PT
|
Gotta agree with the two posts above. +3
|
|
|
SuperTopo on the Web
|
Let us know!