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Gary
Social climber
Where in the hell is Major Kong?
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^^ That's one lame joke.
The Buddha stops at a hot dog cart and tells the guy, "Make me one with everything."
The Buddha pays the cart guy and stands there expectantly. The guys says, "Change comes from within."
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Lurkingtard
climber
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Where does a general put his armies?
In his sleevies.
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Edge
Trad climber
Betwixt and Between Nederland & Boulder, CO
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"I'm sorry" and "my bad" mean the same thing.
Unless you are at a funeral.
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Lurkingtard
climber
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What's the difference between a garbonso bean and a chickpea?
I've never had a garbonso bean on my face.
;-)
~~~
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Gnome Ofthe Diabase
climber
Out Of Bed
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^ ^ ^ ^ ^
If it's pee, she's drunk & you aren't doing it right.
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stunewberry
Trad climber
Spokane, WA
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Jul 19, 2016 - 09:09pm PT
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What kind of dog does a magician have?
A labradacabrador.
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madbolter1
Big Wall climber
Denver, CO
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Jul 20, 2016 - 08:27am PT
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A blond is strolling down a country road. She comes to a river that is flowing across, and there is no bridge. She looks up the river and down the river, but there is no bridge in sight.
Across the river she sees another blond strolling along the river, so the first blond calls across: "Yoo-hoo. Yoo-hoo. How do I get to the other side?"
The second blond looks at the first in obvious puzzlement for a moment and then calls back, "You are on the other side."
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norm larson
climber
wilson, wyoming
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Jul 20, 2016 - 08:40am PT
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3 guys are having lunch. A blond, a redhead, and a guy with black hair.
The guy with the black hair says, my wife is so stupid. She bought a whole side of beef but we are vegetarians and we don't even have a freezer.
Redhead says my wife is really stupid too. She just bought a convertible though she doesn't know how to drive and we don't have a garage.
Blond shakes his head and says you guys have it easy. My wife is so dumb she's going on a business trip to Mexico for a week and she bought a whole case of condoms and she doesn't even have a dick!
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squishy
Mountain climber
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Jul 20, 2016 - 09:19am PT
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"ring ring
"is your refrigerator running?"
"yeah, why?"
"I want to vote for it!"
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overwatch
climber
Arizona
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Jul 20, 2016 - 09:24am PT
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Anthony Jeselnik is one funny guy with his weird tiny hands , him and Tosh
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Barbarian
climber
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Jul 20, 2016 - 10:43am PT
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Two astrophysicists walk to the edge of a black hole....
That sucks!
Sorry. I couldn't resist.
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perswig
climber
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Jul 30, 2016 - 03:32am PT
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Two fronts walk into an isobar...
Dale
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Rock!...oopsie.
Trad climber
the pitch above you
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Jul 30, 2016 - 05:38am PT
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Wow, that terrorist skits video is totally racist and inflammatory but I guess gets points for the no f*#ks given approach to comedy (I laughed and felt shame for doing so). It's groundbreaking in that it is the absolute dumbest idea I've seen people film themselves doing. I blame Ali G for paving the way to that level of stupid.
If they keep at it the BEST case scenario is someone will beat the living sh#t out of them before they end up in jail, shot, or actually hurt/kill someone by "accident".
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Gnome Ofthe Diabase
climber
Out Of Bed
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Jul 30, 2016 - 09:17am PT
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What sound does a grand piano make if you drop it in a hole?
'A' 'Phlat' 'minor' . . .
~So; the wrong crowd~
This mornings gathering,for short ones' -//Hey I Resemble that remark,
a topic I'm intimately aware is fundamental to the text/mexed-up, fare served here
Doesn't belong here, in this thread of Short jokes, it has been a respite from you're, Jody,
Constant banter as if it made a difference. Our kind -the superior white middle-aged males'
Dominance is in decline.
politics? Religion ? Other things ? Short jokes?
Here is a riddle for you, what?
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thebravecowboy
climber
The Good Places
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Jul 30, 2016 - 09:32am PT
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Big J's last words on the cross: "so much for nepotism."
Why doesn't Jesus like Snicker's?
because HE DOESN'T F*#KING EXIST
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overwatch
climber
Arizona
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Jul 30, 2016 - 09:39am PT
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Terrorist bomber skits are the bomb.
Those guys deserve whatever happens to them
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clinker
Trad climber
Santa Cruz, California
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Jul 30, 2016 - 10:23am PT
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The plot to murder Hugh Morris thickens.
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JC Marin
Trad climber
CA
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Jul 30, 2016 - 09:16pm PT
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Q: What did the Deadhead say when the drugs wore off?
A: Dude...this music sucks
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thebravecowboy
climber
The Good Places
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Jul 30, 2016 - 10:00pm PT
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Ted Cruz is the zodiac killer.
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