Discussion Topic |
|
This thread has been locked |
Denise Ackert
climber
CO
|
|
Sep 13, 2007 - 02:44am PT
|
Dear Molly:
Ahh, I think of you every day from down here in Salida. And the tears continue to come as I occassionally get to this site and read your thoughts as you deal with life without Pete. I struggle with words, yet want you to simply know that you and Avery are in my heart every day. I have that picture of you, Pete and Avery (taken right after Avery) was born on my altar and each night I send out wishes to Pete for a safe passage to the other side - whatever that may be.
I look forward to coming to Lander and having the chance for our children to play together! I send you both lots of love.
Big Hugs,
Denise Ackert
|
|
Molly Absolon
climber
Lander, Wyoming
|
|
Sep 13, 2007 - 01:20pm PT
|
Today is Avery's 7th birthday. She was so excited when she went to school today. She felt so grown up. She wanted to talk about her birth so I tried to tell her how it had gone. I remember so clearly at one point Pete was trying to help me and he started counting, "One, one, one..." I turned to him and said, "why the hell are you counting one, one, one?" It turned out somewhere along the line, probably after Denise had told us we should discuss coping strategies for dealing with the pain, Pete had asked me what I did when I swam. I told him I counted the laps, down one direction—one, one, one and back, two, two, two... somewhere along the line he missed the fact that I did actually switch numbers when I changed directions.
It's hard not to have him here to celebrate and remember. Avery has asked why he can't come back. I wish I had an answer.
molly
|
|
katie&dylan
climber
|
|
Sep 13, 2007 - 04:30pm PT
|
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO AVERY!!!!!
Avery,
Dylan wanted to send you a birthday message and started to sing the birthday song from Madagascar for you...Isaac keeps asking, "who is Avery?" and Dylan says, "she is my new friend I found in Finland!" Happy Birthday sweet girl...we are thinking of you.
Molly,
I have been keeping both of you in my thoughts and heart since we returned, sending you all the strength and support you might need as you move through your days. Don't forget that you have a home in Portland if you ever find yourselves over here...
Much love,
Katie and Dylan
|
|
Janeen
climber
Lander, WY
|
|
Sep 13, 2007 - 05:00pm PT
|
Happy Birthday Avery!
I hope you are having a wonderful birthday, I can't believe you're seven!
Were thinking of you here in sunny Tucson!
~Janeen and Ryan
|
|
Cornelia Brefka
climber
Greenwich, CT
|
|
Sep 13, 2007 - 06:43pm PT
|
Happy Birthday Avery!!!
Love-
Cornelia, Paul and Henry
|
|
brian b
climber
Sarotoga Ca
|
|
Sep 14, 2007 - 02:26pm PT
|
Molly & Avery (btw Happy Birthday)
no new Pete stories - but wanted you guys to know we still think about you (and Pete) alot.
Mel (11) and I have taken to going on hikes almost every weekend. She has been learning how to use a map & compass. Told her about our high school days when Pete & Broz and I would sit in the lunch room - over a topo map and pick out - plan our next trips.
be well
-brian
|
|
Janeen
climber
Lander, WY
|
|
Sep 14, 2007 - 06:20pm PT
|
Hope you had a great Birthday Aves!
"Why can't he come back?" - that is a very good question I wish I could answer. What keeps coming to mind is that he is actually ALWAYS here with all of us especially with you and Avery.
I had a dream on Sunday night that I was at your house, sitting with you and Avery on the couch. Pete walked in and I looked shocked. You turned to me and said "I know it's weird but Pete is here and with us" and Pete said, as he sat down on the couch next to me, "Yeah, don't tell too many people cause we don't want to freak them out!". The dream continued as we sat and shared a great evening together, Avery playing on the floor and the three of us chatting.
What that dream told me is, yes, it is true that Pete is always with us especially you and Avery. Like Avery said at the memorial when she kept misplacing things. She looked to the sky and said "Oh Daddy, quit playing tricks on me!". I guess I just hope Avery is able to cultivate ways to recognize that he is always with her, like an angel on her shoulder.
With love from Tucson,
Janeen
|
|
Elkie
Mountain climber
Ellsworth, WI
|
|
Sep 14, 2007 - 06:23pm PT
|
Happy B-lated Birthday Avery!
In an earlier note I mentioned that I would think of Pete when in the mountains hunting and a cool breeze would be a reminder that he was with us, protecting us.
While in Colorado last week (8-31 thru 9-9) archery elk hunting I had this happen numerous times, and each time I thought about Pete, his accident, family and friends. Our trip was highly successful, with all three in my party having a shot at our prized goal.
While we were there a couple from Fort Collins, CO got lost while on a over night hike from Rocky Mountain National Park to HWY 14 off the South Zimmerman Trail, just west of Rustic, CO. Roughly 30 miles I was told. They were supposed to go in Saturday AM and come out Sunday night of Labor Day weekend, but no show.
CO Search & Rescue searched for them the Monday night thru Thursday after Labor Day. We visited with the police, rescue teams and many others searching for the couple while going into or coming out of the forest when hunting. While sitting near the top of the Mummy's Range, east of the National Park in the Roosevelt National Forest, that cool breeze blew and I asked Pete to find the couple safe and sound.
Thursday afternoon, the CO Search & Rescue units located the man and his wife, safe and sound about 1/2 mile east of Peterson Lake, just a few miles from us, safe and sound.
Pete is with us.
Pete is there for you when you need him.
Remember this, and him, as he can be our spiritual guide when we or others around us are in need of assistance.
Just ask for his assistance, and you will be guided safely!
God Bless You All, and a big THANKS, Pete!
~Elkie
|
|
Mary Absolon
climber
Edina, Minnesota
|
|
Sep 16, 2007 - 10:53pm PT
|
Dearest Peter, Friends and Family....
May the road rise to meet you.
May the wind be always at your back.
May the sun shine warm upon your face.
May the rains fall gently upon your fields.
And until we meet again, may God hold you in the palm of His hand.
|
|
Basso
Social climber
Laramie, Wyoming
|
|
Sep 17, 2007 - 12:46am PT
|
Molly and Avery,
Avery, happy birthday. (Sorry my wish is 3 days late, but I just learned about it from reading another post). Your birthday is the same as my mom's. I lost my daddy suddenly too. That was a long time ago now, but I still think of him all the time. My son is named after him.
My family thinks of yours every day. Joe (my 6-year-old son) and I sing a song together called "Goodnight Moon" by Will Kimbrough. I always think of your family when I sing that song anymore.
Molly, judging by the number of people still writing, it seems that you and Avery have many thoughts continuing to make their way to both of you, as Fall deepens. I'm glad. Things will get better, but trust in your friends until they do. You and Avery are loved.
Shaun, Chavawn and Joseph Hatcher Kelley
|
|
LT
climber
lander
|
|
Sep 17, 2007 - 11:58am PT
|
Dearest Molly,
I think of you so often and I am fortunate to see you a few times a week. Did you see the sky on Friday nite? There was a dramatically stormy sky, right before the football game, lightning, rain, thunder rolled in, and then a blue sky opened up toward the west and illuminated the sky to the east, creating the complete arc of a brilliant double rainbow, bright colors glowing through the purple bruise of the storm.
Beauty and wonder co-existing with darkness... happiness dancing while sadness bears down... those paradoxes make me shake my head... how can the world be the same for others when our world has been cracked open at the core and irreversibly changed? How can others smile and say "How are you?" so cheerfully, when we hate that question?
I heard myself automatically asking you that question last week, when I saw you at the gym, "How are you?" as a mere greeting, not a genuine inquiry. I bit my tongue as you looked so pained at me. I'm so sorry. Please forgive me. I know better.
You didn't say "I'm fine" as you might have a month ago. But you also didn't tell me what you really felt: "How the hell do you think I am? I am NOT fine and I'll never be fine again. So that's what you get for asking."
Next time I'll remember and say "How is today going for you? I've been thinking of you. Here's a hug." I love you. Keep hanging in there. It's again, a beautiful day. How does that happen?
Lantien (Chu Ratz)
|
|
Mo Ryan
Mountain climber
Davis, CA
|
|
Sep 17, 2007 - 11:13pm PT
|
Dear Molly,
I learned just last night, with great sadness, of Pete's death. I am so, so sorry. Pete was the best mentor I've ever had, in anything. He briefed and debriefed almost every course I worked at NOLS, but more importantly he was the kind of person who I, and I think many of us, tried to emulate: kind, confident, soft-spoken, insightful, caring, incredibly competent, always friendly. I can't imagine my experience of those years without him in it and am so grateful for that.
My stories of Pete are mostly subtle and not really the kind that bring big laughs or surprise (although I remember him telling many of that sort). But in fact, I'm sure my stories wouldn't be surprising at all to anyone who knew him. I remember mostly his careful wisdom, his genuine interest in people, and his ability to bring the intangible best out of them, us. Those things are hard to describe with stories since they accumulate gently over a lifetime. There are a few that really stand out for me, though. I remember a particular debriefing in which he gave me some insights and advice that I've continued to think about and try to live since then (eight years ago now). The substance of it would not be that interesting to most people so I won't repeat it here but it meant a lot to me because it was good advice and because it was specific to me and because I know that so many of us have been the fortunate recipients of that personal and careful wisdom. I also remember one time that Pete brought an enormous fresh salmon and what seemed like a garden full of vegetables out to Split Rock to a rock camp Scott Robertson, Alison and I were working, and that he was briefing, and made us a spectacular feast under a tarp, in the rain, on the slimy lichen. It was mid-May and I'd been working courses almost straight since January (i.e., eating fried pasta almost straight since January), and it was the nicest thing he could have done. He brought his easy friendliness and big smile and good stories and they were as good as the meal. Otherwise I remember too many great smiles and welcomes and goodbyes than I can recount. It's comforting to me to know that so many of us are out there with our constellations of good will in the memories of the time we passed with Pete, however long or short. I hope they are a comfort to you as well.
I deeply wish that you and Avery had been spared his loss. And I hope that as you walk through the places he spent his time and love and wisdom, that you can feel him there and that it helps you through. I hope our paths will cross again as well, and that I can meet your beautiful 7 YEAR OLD daughter again and see her father in her, and you in her, and her unique self in her. May the land, and friends and family hold both of you close and treat you well.
With love, Mo
|
|
PatH
climber
CO
|
|
Sep 20, 2007 - 12:29am PT
|
Dear Molly,
What horrible news! I heard from friends that someone from NOLS died. When I saw the picture on the web my sadness grew. I know that face. I looked thru old photos from a NOLS course (1992 WMT 7-27) and my hunch was correct. I am so sorry... I hope that the pictures bring you back to a place of happiness. You all were amazing on my course and the Winds were stunning.
...Patrick
|
|
Molly Absolon
climber
Lander, Wyoming
|
|
Sep 20, 2007 - 10:23am PT
|
Alas, I see the supertopo site is winding down. It makes me so sad because to be honest Avery and I are just beginning our journey without Pete and his absence is very, very hard. I have been coming back here periodically because the postings help me feel like he's still close and in people's minds, but I know that it's changing.
I thank everyone again for sharing their memories with me. It does help, sometimes it makes me cry, sometimes laugh, always appreciate what a great man he was and how fortunate I was to share 20 years of my life with him. I miss him more than I can say...
|
|
Lynne Wolfe
Trad climber
Driggs, ID
|
|
Sep 20, 2007 - 11:04am PT
|
Oh Molly your note just above makes me so sad. There is really nothing I or anyone can say to make it better. You know how supportive your community is, but this journey is yours alone. I miss him too; but seeing you say 20 years pretty much blows me away- with only 7 years with Dan it just grows stronger for us. I heard from Sue that there is going to be a sweat this weekend and she wants to take you for dinner or something. I am glad- wish I could come but am still guiding (although it is supposed to snow down to 9000' this weekend).
and we just had to go back to Mass since Dan's Dad died- he was 76 and had triple bypass surgery before our wedding. He had a long full life but still died suddenly. It was still very sad- he had impacted so many people positively. Brings me back to the essential question- how do we live our lives joyously knowing that there is/ will be grief or loss. Reminds me of that Wendell Berry poem about the Peace of Wild Things..
Are you back at work? What are you doing? Been reading? I just finished Water for Elephants by Sara Gruen- new favorite.
love you
Lynne
|
|
sunshinedaydream
Big Wall climber
yosemite area
|
|
Sep 20, 2007 - 11:58am PT
|
Molly & Avery,
A bunch of us just did a climb for Pete and for a few others that we have lost in the past year this past weekend in Yosemite!! He is very much alive in the hearts of many of us here! You have an amazing community all over the world... you both are welcome to come here if you need a hug from us on the west coast!
Jess (from WMI)
|
|
Andrew Morley
Boulder climber
Boulder, Colorado
|
|
Sep 21, 2007 - 03:18pm PT
|
Molly and Avery,
We are thinking about and praying for the two of you and Pete every day. As time passes and you continue on this difficult journey without Pete, please know that we are here to help you in anyway that we can. We will be in touch with emails and phone calls, but don't hesitate to reach out any time, day or night, if we can help in any way.
I know that Pete's spirit is there with the two of you and you will continue to find connections to Pete in your dreams, with your memories, in those many activities and places that you loved and shared, through your families and friends, in the inspiration and encouragement that Pete always provided, and in the love among the three of you that you felt so deeply and expressed so easily and completely.
All our love and prayers are with you.
Andrew and Becky
|
|
Crag
Trad climber
|
|
Sep 21, 2007 - 04:26pm PT
|
Horatio Spafford, a hymnist, wrote after suffering great lose "It is Well with My Soul."
Here's just a short snippet from the text:
When peace like a river, attendeth my way,
When sorrows like sea billows roll;
Whatever my lot, Thou hast taught me to say,
It is well, it is well, with my soul.
Thinking of you both.
|
|
Trina
climber
Nederland, Colorado
|
|
Sep 21, 2007 - 07:23pm PT
|
Hi Molly,
Just know that even those of us who aren't in your closest circles think of you and Avery and Pete often. I have been so touched by the stories and comments I have read on this site for the past weeks and the conversations about Pete that I have had with mutual friends. Pete was clearly a man with an enormous capacity for love, life, leadership and friendship and he was so lucky to have had you as a partner. He set a high standard as a person and together you provided such a positive example of a marriage. I have seen a number of beautiful rainbows in the past month and view them through a Pete and Molly lens now. All my best, Trina Peterson
|
|
mingus
Trad climber
Grand Junction, Colorado
|
|
Sep 21, 2007 - 08:13pm PT
|
Dear Molly and Avery,
I had a vivid dream the other night that astronomers had discovered a new constellation. It was just below Orion and they were amazed it had come from nowhere. The dream was like a documentary and the narrator had that Peter Coyote voice. When the telescope homed in on the star cluster, there was one very bright star that they named the "Pete Star". In my dream all the nearby stars in the constellation were those that loved him most. There was his beautiful suspension in the dark Wyoming night. It reminded me of Lakota and Assiboine stories that when people leave this human form they take a place in the sky to watch over us. Rainbow's -- yes! Stars -- yes! I am expecting to see him in the clouds soon. Thank you Pete, Thank you Pete...Eric M.
|
|
|
SuperTopo on the Web
|