Discussion Topic |
|
This thread has been locked |
canyoncat
Social climber
SoCal
|
|
|
Feb 13, 2019 - 11:16pm PT
|
FWIW I am a woman. I recognize that all people have different levels of strength and ability to deal effectively with stress but I still encourage all women to minimize whining when possible. Words are simply words.
I am not justifying harassment, I'm simply saying we have choice and agency in how much we allow it to affect our lives. When it comes to internet keyboard warriors the best choice is to ignore.
|
|
Bob Thomas
Social climber
Canyon Country
|
|
|
Feb 14, 2019 - 12:32am PT
|
Bold TextOne never should be cavaliar about personal safety on and off the rock. Been touched by both.
Bob Thomas
|
|
mouse from merced
Trad climber
The finger of fate, my friends, is fickle.
|
|
|
Feb 14, 2019 - 01:04am PT
|
Happie, sorry you are being hassled. Trolls suck!
Ditto.
Ignore the ignoramus.
|
|
Mike Honcho
Trad climber
Glenwood Springs, CO
|
|
|
Feb 14, 2019 - 01:17am PT
|
I find having a job tends to keep me out of internet drama like this.
Dang you got that right sister, weird how this all just slips away.
So sorry HG, you seem genuine, I'm the oldest of 5, most all girls. I just want to beat them up for you. That never goes away.. funny.
Caylor!
|
|
ECF
Big Wall climber
Ridgway CO
|
|
|
Feb 14, 2019 - 04:46am PT
|
There is a pretty big difference between calling somebody stupid and threatening them with bodily harm.
If you were threatened with physical assault, that is a crime. Report it.
It’s acusitory to say we know who is doing this.
I have no idea who is petty enough to bother correcting your spelling via email.
I also don’t see how this is a women’s issue.
Long ago, somebody really pissed me off. I badgered him for years about it. I suppose by today’s standards, you could call it harassment. He was always very cordial and syrupy nice in his replies. That just made me more angry and frustrated to the point I eventually stopped and forgave him. It was a learning and growth experience for me.
Sometimes you help people more by not fighting their battles for them, but by giving them the support to fight it themselves.
The poster above wants to bash somebody for you.
I want to show you how to bash someone.
It’s a “giving a fish, or teach how to fish” scenario.
|
|
madbolter1
Big Wall climber
Denver, CO
|
|
|
Feb 14, 2019 - 08:47am PT
|
Wow, this little drama is still going on?
Okay, here's my little contribution of offense, given the "teach to fish" from the above post. ECF, I think you'll like this variant.
Build a man a fire, and you've kept him warm for an hour. SET a man on fire, and you've kept him warm for the rest of his life.
Carry on.
|
|
Happiegrrrl2
Trad climber
|
|
|
Topic Author's Reply - Feb 14, 2019 - 10:39am PT
|
Thank you all for your input.
I did review the logs on the website the contact came through, and have verified that the person is the same one who sent me the more vicious email on October 30th last year.
They also opened the Contact Form on February 4th, but if they followed through, it did not arrive in my inbox.
The IP is in Hacketstown, New Jersey. IP 73.198.68.66
So, yes...
Several years ago, on RC.com, I went through a period of harrassment by a group of people, and one made a post in a forum thread they "played" on that if they saw my dog he would throw it off the cliff. People in that group also followed me around Joshua Tree on one of my visits and took photos of me, posted them on their little thread to have their fun. Some of these people are members of this forum. Current members who post.
But, back to the RC days, when the one posted about killing my dog, that caused me a pretty big amount of distress. I do have PTSD and that event triggered a reaction in my body that caused me to pretty much be out of commission for several days. I can feel "it" now, just thinking about that time.
I have to think this is the same person. At the time, that person had a NJ location on their profile, although I don't remember the town.
I'm a very visible person, where I live and when I travel. I should not have to "hide" to insulate myself from harassment. It is the harasser - SOLELY - who bears responsibility.
|
|
fear
Ice climber
hartford, ct
|
|
|
Feb 14, 2019 - 12:41pm PT
|
Mean people suck, but they're everywhere....
Most email clients have pretty comprehensive spam filters these days which you could likely tune to collect emails like that in a folder for review later. Between ED medication offers (How do they know!!??), Enlargement medications, Nigerian financial offers, IRS arrest warrants, etc I'm filtering over 40 of 'em a day.
I use a paid service provider under fastmail.fm which I've found to be great. You can also set up multiple aliases and domains to better separate filth from real stuff. I'll routinely change/drop aliases I use for forums like this or other websites to stem the tide of spam. I keep the business/personal addresses separate and seldom used except for people I really know and trust.
|
|
Trump
climber
|
|
|
Feb 14, 2019 - 12:41pm PT
|
Shoot I’m sorry to hear that. Some Trumps just muck it all up for the rest of us. On behalf of Trumps everywhere, I offer my sincere condolences. I try not to offer personal feedback, because it has a way of influencing our beliefs about the ideas being expressed, but keep up the good work - I enjoy hearing your perspectives.
|
|
couchmaster
climber
|
|
|
Feb 14, 2019 - 01:18pm PT
|
Happiegrrrl2 said, quote: "And Anita, obviously having a job doesn't seem to be enough to keep you away from making catty remarks pertaining to me. What is it with you and my work not being job enough to count in your eyes? I have no doubt that when I was in my earlier profession I made double the salary you probably do. So please, stop with it already.
"
Since she didn't say anything untoward to you at all on this thread, your response to Anita seems out of line. Maybe you should be rethinking how you talk to (some) people as well.
|
|
couchmaster
climber
|
|
|
Feb 14, 2019 - 01:22pm PT
|
Please note my last response which was supportive that also noted you doing the same thing to another person: http://www.supertopo.com/climbing/thread.php?topic_id=3138846&msg=3139912#msg3139912
Couchmaster said to Happygrl2 last October:"WOW!
Happie: group hug. Sorry to see such trash sent to anyone, it's wrong and we all F**ing condemn it and the jerk who sent it. We all (almost all, excepting one person) wish you the best. I did think you over reacted a tad to Another nickname, he was simply..." blah blah etc etc
Sorry Terry/Happy, my earlier comments hold true. Especially the part where no one should have to deal with that kind of crap. Sorry, and I hope they stop soon and send you an apology. What the rest of us do is simply block the sender, call it junk mail. You won't see any more of it until they get a new email account. Good luck
Regards:
|
|
John M
climber
|
|
|
Feb 14, 2019 - 01:35pm PT
|
Couchmaster, Anita has a history of making snarky comments about Terri not having a decent paying regular job.
|
|
Clint Cummins
Trad climber
SF Bay area, CA
|
|
|
Feb 14, 2019 - 01:37pm PT
|
Many of the responses here are very good, like those by ECF.
The msg you quoted in the first post does not sound like hate;
more like a spelling critique (which is trivial to most people) and attempted insult.
But it sounds like the previous msg was a lot worse.
Sorry that happened, but some people are anonymous jerks.
Try to ignore/forgive them and return your attention to positive things.
Certainly fine to quote them and make other people aware, though.
Also I would not supply them with info on what triggers you.
I would advise editing your most recent post to remove that.
 Clint
|
|
couchmaster
climber
|
|
|
Feb 14, 2019 - 01:37pm PT
|
John M noted: "Couchmaster, Anita has a history of making snarky comments about Terri not having a decent paying regular job." Thanks JohnM, that's just Anita. Most of us have been raked by her scathing wit. She snarks on everyone but she's trying to funny (and usually is too).
|
|
SC seagoat
Trad climber
Santa Cruz, Moab, Bozeman, the ocean, or ?
|
|
|
Feb 14, 2019 - 02:00pm PT
|
What a d#@&%ebag.
It’s always easy to say “suck it up”. That’s been the typical fall back. So if Happpie wants to get it out there so be it. Sometimes it’s just about listening.
On Another note....a beautiful piece of art I got from Happpie today....her work is exquisite.... whenever I wear one of her pieces I have strangers come up to me and inquire....”where...”.
So the anonymous spineless, yellow belly, mud sucking, low life, weakling wimp, try creating something this BEAUTIFUL....
Happie....so many people on here can’t even begin to hold a candle to your authenticity and genuine spirit. You are a true spirit of the universe with a soul and heart to match.
Susan
|
|
Trump
climber
|
|
|
Feb 14, 2019 - 02:35pm PT
|
We live in a world of as#@&%es.
Our president is an as#@&%e.
He was elected according to the rules of our democracy by as#@&%es who voted for him to be our president.
We have as#@&%es who post sh#t, and we have as#@&%es who ban as#@&%es for posting sh#t. I guess maybe they disagree on the definition of sh#t. Sometimes they’re probably triggered by stupid little sh#t, on either side.
We have one quite an as#@&%e who sent you some shitty emails. That sucks. My condolences.
And I’ll bet those as#@&%es have other stuff going on too, other than being as#@&%es. They climb some routes, they drink a beer, maybe they read their kids a bedtime story. Heck even Trump voters read, don’t they? I hope some of them make jewelry. I’m pretty sure at this point of the post that a bunch of them think I’m an as#@&%e. And that’s ok - they’re my peeps too - I’m probably less of an as#@&%e to them than I am to the polar bears.
I’m sorry we have to deal with as#@&%es, I’m sorry I have to deal with as#@&%es, I’m sorry you have to deal with as#@&%es, I’m sorry they have to deal with as#@&%es, I’m sorry the polar bears have to deal with as#@&%es.
I’m not saying suck it up, I’m just trying to offer you a way of thinking about it that might help you. You deserve that - you deserve a way of living among as#@&%es that doesn’t leave you feeling shitty.
You living your life among as#@&%es is not really about them. Please don’t make me mansplain it any further. I can be kind of an as#@&%e that way.
But really what I’m hoping for you is that you can find a way to be content in spite of it, rather than you needing other people to behave the way you prefer them to. Because there’s just not a ton you can do about how other people respond. Even if the way we respond is to tell other people that the way they should respond is to just listen, or whatever, when that’s not how we ourselves actually do respond to reports of an anonymous spineless, yellow belly, mud sucking, low life, weakling wimp. Or even if we do tend more towards noticing the ways that other people are as#@&%es than we do towards noticing the ways that we’re as#@&%es.
But definitely do what you can to change their behavior to suit you better too, and good luck in that regard.
Wishing y’all well!
|
|
Off White
climber
Tenino, WA
|
|
|
Feb 14, 2019 - 02:52pm PT
|
It doesn't matter who you are or who your target is, stalker behavior sucks and is completely unacceptable.
|
|
johntp
Trad climber
Punter
|
|
|
Feb 14, 2019 - 03:14pm PT
|
Susan- Right on!
|
|
anita514
Gym climber
Great White North
|
|
|
Feb 14, 2019 - 04:51pm PT
|
She's missin' the mark!
Her moronic, shitass comments are the direct antithesis of funny!
K
hey Ekat- thanks for popping in. Got outside for a walk lately? Maybe get into a tent, or climb or something? Are you still sore because I don't care that you knew some climbers once upon a time or had never even heard of you when I joined this site?
Sorry you are still holding on to the hate. Maybe if you got out and got the blood flowing it might help?
|
|
|
SuperTopo on the Web
|
Let us know!