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bjj
climber
beyond the sun
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I flat out refuse to take any girl I am dating climbing, unless she has been climbing *outside* for at least a year prior to my having met her.
Under no circumstances will I take someone even toproping because "they always wanted to try it". That's 99% of the time code for "I just want to be around you no matter what the activity". Or possibly "I know there's hot girls out there, and I want to keep an eye on you".
There is just waaaaay too much potential for things going sideways. Besides that, my climbing is my "me time". Why would I want a girl around 24/7? That's how people end up sick of each other.
However, all bets are off if the girl really is into climbing and likes to go of her own volition since before I knew her.
About 15 years ago when I was living in Tahoe, I briefly dated a very strong female climber. One of our first hangs was a trip to lover's leap where she wanted to take a try leading "mainline" an old Bachar, Kauk, Smith route that went at fairly stiff 5.11 and with small fiddly gear. Technical and intimidating.
The girl sketched her way through it, nervous as hell about climbing past teeny cams. She almost pitched, then pulled it together and fired it off! I could hear her whooping for joy at the top. I managed to follow cleanly and when I arrived at the top, we were both so amped up, we were close to just tearing off our harnesses and clothing and going at it right then and there.
That's pretty much the only kind of girl I would want to climb with. No offense to anyone else.
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supafly
Trad climber
vancouver, bc
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the traverse pitch to the bottom of Banana Peel in Squam has caused many a dirty word to be said :)
My friend took his lady up there on her first multipitch and they made it no further than that traverse. Although to get off she had to reverse the whole traverse again!
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ncskains
Ice climber
Alaska
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The boyfriend was leading, maybe 50 feet out and still climbing as they screamed and screamed until finally the girl says "F#ck you this is over!!" as she continued to feed rope. BF still climbing "F#ck me?! F#ckme??!! No! F#ck you!!"
So f#cking funny.
And the next thing you here, is "NO F#Ck You, Off Belay" lol
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LuckyPink
climber
the last bivy
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ho man.. the microcosm of relationship. Once my partner and I were on an easy cruiser in RR and we are simul-ing passing other parties and we come up on a burnt out girlfriend belaying the boyfriend leader who is struggling like crazy breaking out in sweat 3/4 of the rope out. She's angry and done, he's calling directions on how to clean back to her, in between "take". Finally she just takes him off belay and sits back and starts to cry. She thinks he is secured. We can see that he is not. We get him back on belay and give her a hug , partner climbs up and secures boyfriend at top, secures upper belay to gf , I climb up and clean everyone's gear and get them started on the descent,while the fuming is still going on. In the meantime , over our walkie talkies, we can hear ANOTHER couple screaming back and forth at each other over their radios full on fight while climbing AND then a friend of ours comes on the radio to say "hey you guys are going at it what's up" thinking it's us fighting (which later becomes a whole gossip thing that my partner and I were fighting on this route.. lol). But our friend cannot make contact with us on the right band , we can't tell him what's up. We can just hear all these other parties. SO, we are chuckling with each other, having a great time, and on the descent we decide that with all these frustrated noobs we better check below the route in the deep shrubs and SURE ENOUGH ! MEGA big booty, new cams found, a #3 and a #2 , good locking carabiner on a sling and a nut all scattered around apparently dropped from above over the last few weeks. SCORE on Meltdown Sunday
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Tod
Trad climber
Idaho
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Speaking of Tunnel Vision;
Was trying to do Group Therapy in that area with my girlfriend. Her first multipitch.
Short version: Off route from first pitch; kept going through long run outs and really crappy belays to top out. When I stopped for a bite to eat she just looked at me and said; "Get us the f*#k out of here!"
She was a trooper though; didn't cry until the descent. Wasn't likely a first ascent but we called it "Pre-marital Counseling" anyways. Been married ten years and she still won't do more than sport climb with me!
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RealOldTradClimber
Trad climber
Greenfield, NH
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I was once climbing a very pleasant, and well-protected face route with my wife (who was indeed quite happy on it) and about 50 feet to one side of us was another couple climbing a really dirty, unpleasant chimney route which the girlfriend, quite rightfully, was not really appreciating.
Finally she just screamed at her about-to-be-her-ex-boyfriend and yelled, "All I really wanted was a dinner and movie!" I think that was the end of that climb and the relationship!
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Chip
Trad climber
Sittin' Pretty in Fat City
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Shockley's Ceiling in the gunks. Every weekend.
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yellowdog
Sport climber
Living in St. Louis but the Blue Ridge is home
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My buddies and I didn't stick around to find out, but I think this was probably the beginning of a break up climb (or worse) in Foster Falls near Chattanooga, TN:
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michaeld
Sport climber
Sacramento
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Knapsack Crack in the middle of winter.
She couldn't feel her feet or hands.
We hung out between the two boulders by Monk's Rock for a bit to warm up.
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adikted
Boulder climber
Tahooooeeeee
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Took my first ex-girlfriend to table rock in NC for her first climb....she made it about one step up Jim Dandy 5.6?? Before she ripped into me in full crying why are you making me do this mode...needless to say after the bail we stashed the gear and went hiking while out other friends climbed...our relationship fizzled after that....lost a pair of trekking poles that day too.... Damn ex girlfriends!!
Greg
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the Fet
climber
Tu-Tok-A-Nu-La
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A party of two was lowering off of Haley's Comet I believe, to the left of the first pitch of After Six. The boyfriend went down on one line and was starting to lower the girlfriend from the belay ledge at the top of the first pitch of after six.
-Umm, you can't lower from there.
-GF: WHAT??!!
-BF: Huh? Yes we can. -Still lowering.
-No, it's too far.
-GF: Wait! Stop!
-You'll run out of rope and she'll be stuck or be dropped
-GF: You need to stop!
-BF: No, it's fine.
-GF: STOP!
GF batmans back up 15 feet to the ledge. PISSED. I hope she dumped the guy. When someone is telling you don't do something because you might kill your girlfriend you DON'T get defensive and ignore them.
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TheTye
Trad climber
Sacramento CA
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My GF and I started climbing at the same time so I think we are doing really well at handling each other when she starts getting burnt out and cranky...
We have summer plans to do a handful of long moderates and I have been trying to workout in my head how I am going to delicately motivate her when we are 7 pitches up with several to go and she hits the wall...
It's funny how that is an important part of my training...
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squishy
Mountain climber
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Jun 17, 2013 - 01:56pm PT
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That's funny you guys mention cathedral peak, it appeared there was a tearful breakup going on there at the base on saturday...
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hooblie
climber
from out where the anecdotes roam
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Jun 17, 2013 - 02:36pm PT
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the break-up track of two self realized climbers
is the subtle silence of other plans being made
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brat
climber
formerly El Portal
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Jun 17, 2013 - 02:47pm PT
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OMG I can't believe it hasn't been mentioned yet...
I have always referred to Overhang Bypass on Intersection Rock as The Breakup Climb.
Girlfriend is following second pitch traverse, boyfriend didn't place much gear, girlfriend falls and is hanging in space, she doesn't know how to prussik, boyfriend is up top and can't hear her, so she hangs and cries and yells and is eventually coached through the mess by other climbers on the ground. I've witnessed this scene half a dozen times, and I've been the belayer for a similar scene (except I'm a girl, I wasn't dating my male partner, and he eventually (30+ minutes later) figured out to prussik... and I don't think he cried, but I'm not really sure)
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jfailing
Trad climber
PDX, North Slope, The Open Road
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Jun 17, 2013 - 02:57pm PT
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brat - that's hilarious! I've definitely witnessed something close to that on overhang bypass... Luckily you have that fun little cave to hang out and watch the drama unfold.
I love the guys who say "babe" after everything when they climb with their GF's.
"Yeah babe, you got it babe"
"Babe, you gotta get your foot higher babe"
"Nah babe, you gotta heel hook it"
"Babe, you're not doing it right babe"
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Gal
Trad climber
a semi lucid consciousness
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Jun 17, 2013 - 04:02pm PT
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If your girlfriend says she doesn't like to boulder, but then tries to go for your sake, just tread lightly & be cool, ie: NICE. The common beta spray down and yelling of "come on!!!" "Just do the move". One tries to explain, look if you yell out "encouragement" all amped up style, I want to give up and fall. And also explained from gf is it would be preferred not to feel pressured, it needs to not matter whether top out occurs or not. Then there's the being almost at the top of some 15ft thing where the hardest move is, one doesn't want to make the move because it feels very hard, the yelling come on come on, then the obvious not going to do it and downclimb, then the all disappointed irritated sigh, ohhh god... you could have done that, the implied you should try harder. Then the gf mentions the fact that she doesn't have health insurance, and bouldering is not worth a broken ankle and season off climbing, and then a Jesus Christ in response, your friends arrive, and not a word spoken to me the rest of the most miserable 3 hours. So then we don't make it to climb at Granite Mountain, Magnolia Thunderpussy the next day, and I still feel jipped about that... oh well. that was the middle of the end.
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ladyscarlett
Trad climber
SF Bay Area, California
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Jun 17, 2013 - 04:35pm PT
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HAHA
This is hilarious. I haven't seen that many couples break up, but I have seen climbing partner break ups...
To me, it shows just how much repression can go on within relationships! Climbing and otherwise..
I feel lucky that I have generally able to spot the dick climber boys who are likely to be dick climbing BFs.
'Hey! You Climb? I can totally take you up this bitchin' hard infamous route that must be your greatest dream to do. See this super hard problem I can do? I'll give you a spot on it! I'll show you all about climbing...!!'
Sorry dude, sounds like you're so insecure about who you are, that you have to build an image to impress me with... barking up the wrong tree, dude...too immature to go long, strong, and all the way to the top, and back again. I need more stamina and patience, both mind and body, than anything you can bring to the crag...
I don't know if it's where I climb, but I am far more likely to see climbing partner break ups than BF-GF break ups.
Now THOSE are just as hilarious...even my own few climbing partner break ups!
Cheers
LS
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zeta
Trad climber
Portland, OR
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Jun 17, 2013 - 05:35pm PT
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I got another one for Cathedral!
Years ago, I taught my ex-bf how to climb--gym climbing, toproping--and somehow thought it'd be great to take him up Cathedral. I'd taken him up NW books the day before and he seemed fine, though in retrospect, I realize that he was actually pretty scared but didn't want to show it.
I led the first pitch, he starts climbing, gets to a spot 6 ft below the anchor and just....freezes. Refuses to move. When I ask him how he's doing ('are you ok' or the encouraging 'you're doing fine!') he gets more pissed. People standing on the ground yelling up encouraging words (or climbing and soloing past him and trying to talk to him), this does not help at all. After a really long time, he asks to be lowered, I rap off, we bail (so sad! I love Cathedral!). He's pissed at me for the rest of the weekend.
While we didn't break up on that climb, it was the beginning of the end. And definitely the last time I'll ever teach a bf how to climb.
I bet climbing break ups happen all the time on Cathedral!
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Inner City
Trad climber
East Bay
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Jun 17, 2013 - 06:28pm PT
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I think our last climb was Sunshine on Drug Dome...the clouds came in soon therafter...
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