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labrat
Trad climber
Nevada City, CA
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Jan 18, 2013 - 03:48pm PT
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No! Too addictive. Shove him out of the house to play Kick the Can until dark. Then dinner. Then homework. Then read a book. Then go to bed.
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ontheedgeandscaredtodeath
Social climber
SLO, Ca
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Jan 18, 2013 - 04:19pm PT
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My concern would be exposure to bloviating morons prior to solid development of critical thinking skills. I would not want my children forming opinions based on what he and she read here.
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Reilly
Mountain climber
The Other Monrovia- CA
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Jan 18, 2013 - 05:24pm PT
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"middle-aged"? HaHaHaHaHaHa!!!!!!!!
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'Pass the Pitons' Pete
Big Wall climber
like Ontario, Canada, eh?
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Jan 18, 2013 - 05:41pm PT
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Ever type "ctrl + h" after he's been on your computer? That should tell you everything you need to know.
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telemon01
Trad climber
Montana
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Jan 18, 2013 - 06:32pm PT
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I always thought this place was at least PG-13, with plenty of R and NC-17 thrown in.
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divad
Trad climber
wmass
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Jan 18, 2013 - 07:35pm PT
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he's 11?
not yet. the average poster here sounds like maybe jr. high school age...
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mike m
Trad climber
black hills
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Topic Author's Reply - Jan 19, 2013 - 09:42pm PT
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He hasn't brought it up again but we did get out and rock climb a little today.
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LuckyPink
climber
the last bivy
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Jan 19, 2013 - 10:05pm PT
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11 yrs old? why would he need a supertopo account?
Be his dad , not his pal. there are plenty of pals, but just one father.
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rgold
Trad climber
Poughkeepsie, NY
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Jan 19, 2013 - 11:07pm PT
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I don't know if it is possible to save kids from the internet, but it seems to me to be worthwhile to try. At 11 years old there are plenty of other things he could be doing with his time.
Much of what I've learned from the internet is what kind of person I don't want to be. That's fine for me, but I don't think an 11 year-old has any context for the absence of civility and common decency that characterizes a lot of internet discourse, and I think very little good can come from putting young people in situations that often make bullying, insulting, trolling, and other fairly base forms of human interaction, things usually suppressed in genuine interpersonal interactions, appear not only to be the norm, but often the subject of appreciation for the onlookers.
People will say this is modern life, but I'd say one of the things a parent ought to do is to carve out a little breathing room for kids to have a decent childhood, a place where wonder and naivete won't be met by sarcasm, a place where purposely trying to upset people up with statements you don't believe isn't a sport, a place where the possibility of human communication based on mutual respect is still pervasive. There's far too little such space on the internet, and children aren't in a position to evaluate dysfunction when they are surrounded by it.
I don't mean to tar Supertopo with a broad a brush, there are many thoughtful and interesting things going on here, and some of them are even related to climbing. But it's still the internet, with plenty of the behavioral extremes that anonymity seems to bring on.
He's got his entire adult life to navigate this terrain, and a very brief moment to be a kid. There's no need to rush the transition, and many reasons to think it unhealthy.
So I'm with Tami. Get yourself out of this. Find an alternate reward...
...and then get out of the rewards business. I think that overcoming adversity is, by itself, one of the rewards of climbing, and layering on external inducements that aren't part of the actual experience might mute that point and make the whole activity about something much less valuable, not at all what you were hoping for.
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neebee
Social climber
calif/texas
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Jan 20, 2013 - 12:21am PT
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hey there say, mike m.... and to rgold...
as to this qoute, and tami's withing that:
He's got his entire adult life to navigate this terrain, and a very brief moment to be a kid. There's no need to rush the transition, and many reasons to think it unhealthy.
So I'm with Tami. Get yourself out of this. Find an alternate reward...
...and then get out of the rewards business. I think that overcoming adversity is, by itself, one of the rewards of climbing, and layering on external inducements that aren't part of the actual experience might mute that point and make the whole activity about something much less valuable, not at all what you were hoping for.
that sounds very wise... kids are the internett toooooo much... :(
mike, perhaps this may help:
*example... my granddaughter was here today, last night, and that afternoon of yesterday... she learned more by me mentoring her as a
whose person whose brain was not connected to a computer of images and writing...
she had all her 'being' to work through, and use, and used this to develope
'realtionship' as to learning WHAT to do with herself as a young
adult....
computers are great study tools, but most studying is done better, after childhood lessons have been tackled well, first... less emotional confusion, as the 'whole person' can face it all better....
hope this helps...
:)
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hossjulia
Trad climber
Where the Hoback and the mighty Snake River meet
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Jan 20, 2013 - 09:18am PT
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If he's that sharp a kid, just tell him you made a mistake and Supertopo is still too adult for him. Pick out some great TR's and history for him to read and download it.
At this point, if he is lurking, he won't be able to resist telling you. ;->
A few more years, you'll never get those pre-teens back, don't rush it.
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TWP
Trad climber
Mancos, CO
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Jan 20, 2013 - 10:19am PT
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Mike, the answer is obvious.
Look at what you told your son:
"I sorta told him he could have a supertopo account if he climbed Devil's Tower."
Your promise must be kept. My father weaseled on a few of his promises to me and he paid for it dearly in terms of respect and our relationship.
P.S. Why do you weasel with the "sorta told him" characterization of the promise. Is this like the girl who is sorta pregnant? Either you did or you didn't.
PPS. Now that I've tooled you on "loose lips sink ships" there is another option. Honest renegotiation with admission of your parenting error in making a promise that should not be kept and explain of why "not now" for a Supertopo account could easily be another (or even superior) alternative.
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Spider Savage
Mountain climber
The shaggy fringe of Los Angeles
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Jan 20, 2013 - 10:26am PT
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NO.
11 year old boys are too smart for this place. He will embarrass all of us.
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rgold
Trad climber
Poughkeepsie, NY
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Jan 20, 2013 - 12:09pm PT
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I think yall flatter yourselves way too much.
If this kid is anything like mine? This place is inhabited by OLD F*#KS who listen to ANCIENT SH#T and blah blah blah blah about ANCIENT SH#T that happened BACK IN THE DAY while they lecture about how lazy kids are these days.
In other words?
BORING.
You're probably right. But my comments, for whatever they're worth, were about the internet generally and only tangentially about this site.
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mike m
Trad climber
black hills
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Topic Author's Reply - Jan 20, 2013 - 09:21pm PT
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Would it be impossible for me to be his father and give him my OK to have an internet account? Trust me much caution here, but he does not have a facebook account (as far as I know) like many of his friends. No major trouble, straight A's ect. It will be his only chance to meet some of you old farts and strangely he is interested.
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tooth
Trad climber
B.C.
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Jan 20, 2013 - 09:54pm PT
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Let him read this thread?
He'll, 1. understand that you want what is best for him and 2. see that everyone here doesn't want him messed up by all the crap around here.
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Big Mike
Trad climber
BC
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Jan 20, 2013 - 10:02pm PT
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Is it possible people would act better if they knew there was a 11 year old kid around?
Nah..
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mike m
Trad climber
black hills
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Topic Author's Reply - Jan 20, 2013 - 10:13pm PT
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There already is one and probably several others. Don't forget he is soon to be 12.
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neebee
Social climber
calif/texas
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Jan 20, 2013 - 10:22pm PT
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hey there, say, mike m... no meaning to be pushing, but just worried
a bit, as to internet stuff for such a young boy...
share you time, mike, you will never regert it then...
say, hope this helps.. a few thins i have seen..
examples:
computers ISOLATE people that are in the same house...
relationships and interaction as face to face, are really needed at this young age...
look around you, what to folks do or say, when on computers:
i am busy, not now...
don't bother me...
wait... later, wait... am busy now...
(the list goes on)...
hours can fly by, and are lost, as to personal contact with folks
at home, etc... or chores, etc... you need tremendous decipline, if
a child... the do not have this yet, and it comes by 'real life interaction' as to other things they do, as to goals, etc..
now, without the computer (or even stuck on tv) people THE
MUST learn to interact, which is very important for kids,
and for mariages, too, etc..
SUCH AS--they have to learn HOW to deal with what is
right there in their house:
when something is wrong, when someone 'thinks' someone is 'in their face' etc, or bothering them, or, if they feel ignored, or have more need, etc or are jealous over others, well, they have to
relate and learn to deal with it, they need to be coached through it, smooth it out, do chores together, etc ,share their feelings, learn to grow, discuss how the day will go tomorrow, etc...
SADLY:
i know a few young kids around me (i have no say so in the matters) welll:
they are too young to be on facebook, etc, but one family the mom watches
the child... the other child is not watchd, as she has her own phone and the mom and uses its on line, whenever, and at friends, house, too, the mom can't constantly keep tabs on her... she is not quite 12!
there is another child!! too, who has an facebook account, and the mom has no clue what she does--she is 11 going on 12, posting things to her friends in very womanlife manners... the mom has no clue and will not listen to us, that would warn her...
she says that the girl is old enough to know better...
now:
IF the mom had an ongoing face to face realationship, this would not be happening, or
going on in such a way--they would be too busy BEING a family and working the
'needs for attention' that ALL CHILDEN have and need to have 'emotional feedings as to'....
so:
you have a wonderful WONDERFUL chance, mike m, to be a dad, mentor and even a friend, to your son, all rolled up in on... do NOT loose it, just for the sake of
'everyone has internet this young'... don't LOSE your son...
be with him everyday and learn who he is ...
work the yard together...
play ball...
if he climbs, more, then climb...
cook together...
laugh togethers...
dont lose him to 'others that he will think LOVE him more'...
a cousin of these young girls that i just mentioned, well:
THAT cousin just got a ticket to go to florida to meet a boy
friend that she met on the internet... her dad never had time for her
the family aunts etc, tried to give her time, but she by then, did not
want it... she is not even 16 yet, either... perhaps 14? i think...
the dad is now trying to keep in touch with her by phone, since
she called him one... they do not know anything about this guy/man,
at all...
kids NEED their parents... :)
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