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Topper Wilson
Trad climber
Pueblo, CO
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Molly,
Something to relay to Avery: Remember when "lycra" came out? You had gotten Pete some multi-colored lycra and insisted that it be worn without underwear because that was the way everyone wore it. Pete was incredulous: "without underwear, NO Way..." I remember the three of us were climbing at Seneca and this conversation/debate continued between the two of you throughout the day, from ledge to ledge... One of Pete's comments was, "what if the locals see me?" Surely Pete would be subject to ridicule for days to come had a local West Virginian seen him! But, he was mainly stuck on the idea of not wearing underwear; he had a hard time getting over it. Pete had started that day in other clothing but eventually migrated to Lycra (without underwear). I think he changed back to non-colorful, rather mundane Patagonia shorts and t-shirt before he got back to the climbing shop...
To the NOLS folks reading this, Pete's memorial was just beautiful. You did a spectacular job organizing and executing it. It was really special, bar none. I've been to other services before, but never have I seen some many flowers or heard so many good, healthy conversations.
To Molly and Avery, from reading this thread daily, it seems like there's about a billion people out there that care about you; take comfort in that during your darker moments. Though it will be no easy task, you will do well. Just use your friends, let them help; they all want to...
Love,
Topper
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Cornelia Brefka
climber
Greenwich, CT
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Good times with Pete, we will always remember.
LOVE,
Paul and Henry (Pete's nephews)
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Mary Absolon
climber
Edina, Minnesota
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News Flash!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Posted 4 pm central time.
"Team Absolon" Expedition, named after Pete Absolon of Lander, Wyoming a nationally recognized rock climber and person exceptionale, has embarked for a trek up Mt.Rainier in Washington State. Team Absolon is composed of Chris Herber, Pete Absolon's nephew, Tim Sheehan and Brian Faeth, close friends of Pete Absolon's brother-in-law, Bill Herber all of Edina, Minnesota. Chris Herber attained his mountaineering skills this past summer while on the NOLS Alaska course under the skilled mentoring of Mike Spayd, a dear friend of Pete's, Louisa Hunker and Gary McLaughlin.
Chris Herber found a passion in mountaineering while on the NOLS course which was recommended for him to attend by his Uncle Pete.
Molly and Avery Absolon were notified in person at the Denver International Airport that this special expedition was named for her husband Pete. Molly and Avery were able to give Chris Herber hugs before they were returned to their friends and lives Lander, Wyoming.
Peter has been asked by Mary Absolon, Chris's mother, to please watch over Team Absolon Expedition for their safety and to guide Molly and Avery as they return to Lander.
Thank you Pete......continue to be a rock as we live our lives..
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John Gregory
Trad climber
washington, dc
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Folks are going to assemble at Seneca Rocks November 10 to remember Pete, Howard Doyle and Greg Smith. If you can't make it you can send stories and photos to gregoryj@mindspring.com
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Christine Rogers
Trad climber
Laramie, WY
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Molly,
Your post about rainbows leaves me breathless...
We'd planned to send you a hardcopy of this picture, and we actually wanted to tell you about it at Pete's service, but we weren't sure about the timing. Neither of us is religious in the traditional sense, so we are still sorting out the meaning ourselves. However, now seems like a perfect time to to share this...
The day before Pete's service, exactly one week after his death, we were driving out of the Snowy Range after a hike. We'd spent the day talking and thinking about Pete, and you, and Avery. We'd paused at a high lake to wonder about the fragility (and magnitude) of our lives, and of Pete's life.
As we passed through Centennial on the way to our new home in Laramie, we almost drove off the road. There, in front of us, was the most spectacular rainbow either of us had ever seen. EVER. It was a full, double rainbow--so bright it almost hurt to look at it. There were colors I didn't even know existed. It's been a long time since I've seen a rainbow--any rainbow. It sucked the breath right out of me. For a moment, I was so awed I was paralyzed. Luckily, we pulled over to the shoulder without incident and snapped a picture. The photo doesn't do it justice, of course...
Anyway, we just wanted to let you know that you are not alone. From the people who surround and support you here on earth, to the mysteries beyond that we cannot explain but can only notice and wonder about, it is so clear that you are not alone. May you truly SEE many more rainbows. Be sure you look up when you are galloping…
Chrissy Rogers and Brad Stanton
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Kari Grady Grossman
climber
Lander, Wyoming
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Dear Molly,
Like many, I keep coming back here to read about Pete and continue to be filled with disbelief that this has happened. It is so difficult to know how to be a good friend to you from so far away. We moved to Ft. Collins the day before Pete's accident, and it has made being away from our Lander community so hard. Our new town feels so empty. It is good to hear your voice on this thread. You are a gifted writer.
I have a memory of Pete to share, since so many have been talking about his dancing. It was a couple summers ago, Grady and Avery must have been about 3 and we were all at the Lander Beer Fest. Avery was either off with her friends or you had the good sense not to bring your 3 year old to a beer fest. Anyway, at the time Grady was obsessed with a book called "Climbing the Daddy Mountain" and his Daddy George was darn sick of being climbed. Well, Pete let Grady climb is daddy mountain, all the way up to his shoulders, all night long. George and I danced a song or two and when we saw that Grady was continuing to climb Pete we came over to tell him to knock it off. Pete said "Now I know how the mountain feels." He said he didn't mind. Now, for all I know, you might have been completely annoyed the whole night, but Pete continued to allow Grady to play on him, and we got to dance. Thank you Pete for letting us dance. Thank you Pete for being the mountain.
In honor of the grace and balance in life that Pete exemplified, George and I have started the Pete Absolon Memorial Fitness Challenge. As in get off your butt, get on the bike, and get it done, no excuses. I have at times felt his presence nudging me to push harder when I'm feeling lazy and wanting to quit. Thanks Pete.
VIDEO:
I was hoping to start our video project of memories of Pete the weekend of Sept 28th-Sept 30th, but I hear you are going to be down here for a horse clinic. We will find another weekend, at your convenience. If anyone sends you video of Pete, we will be happy to edit it into the piece.
I hope I get to see you soon. I really need to hug you. I'm available to help with child care in Colorado if you need it.
Love,
Kari
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Mei Ratz
climber
Lander, WY
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Molly and My Little sister of cercumstance - Avery.
I have tried to prepair myself better before reading the brilliant stories on this site, but alas....i am in the dreaded student athlete study tables wiping away my tears. I send every ounce of my love, and every bit of my hugs that can be sent. you have made it another day! yipee.
i am in the process of writing a letter to send snail mail to you both, but until then...
Never give up, never surrender! - My daddy
"The rainbows come after the storms in life"
and
Fly well and fly true Pete.
All my love.
Mei
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Mary Absolon
climber
Edina, Minnesota
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Hi Everyone....just missing Pete....and Fritz....
The Absolon Family has gone through a lot over the last few weeks.
Approximately, 29 years ago we lost our brother/son Fritz in an accident. He was 22 years old and was a geology major just like Pete.
Now some 29 years later, we loose another brother/son/father/lover, Peter.
This is a tragedy for us all. We loved both of these people so much and it is painful to relive and have these deep feelings of pain rekindled again...
So many friends who went through our first brother/son's death have been supportive and are walking this second tragedy with us again. We appreciate the visits, photos, calls of support and everything you are doing for us.
Thank you so much from the bottom of our hearts. Thank you Broz, Sally, Kate, Maggie, Tony, Eva, Jack, Henry, Zhi, Brenda, Fran, The Alpars, Leslie, Neva, Rick, Uncle John, Deanna, Kate, Leanne, John G., Jim ....
Some of us in the family would desire to have been the one sending rainbows at this time to people on earth, rather than Pete. However, we do not have control so we are piecing together our lives and receiving rainbows...
We have new memories ahead. There is a disco floor waiting the Absolon grandchildren at the Delehanty house for some future gathering; there is a special vacation spot where we can veg abit; and there are the corners where we will always miss our dear Pete and Fritz all the days of our lives.
I dropped off films of the Absolon Family to have made into DVDs that we can all view when we are together. To Dad, thanks for making these 8 mm films- you have always been the historian in our family and it was your filming that will give us this priceless treasure.
Love, Mary
Pete's sister
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TheKid
Trad climber
Fort Collins, CO
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Dear Molly -
I'm so very sorry to hear about Pete. Going way back to winter-to-spring of '91, Semester in the Rockies, I remember your stories about climbing with Pete. If I'm not mistaken you told us the story about "just letting go" and then running out of batteries on the descent. There were a few other harrowing tales around the circle back then that have stuck with me in a fragmentary kind of way. There was often a mix of raw emotion, humor and love of life in your climbing stories. I also recall seeing Pete in action during our climbing section in Sinks Canyon, I think he was there with his group. Bright colors and a funny warm hat? There was something about him, and something about the two of you. Clearly, not everyone has it - whatever it is - or gets to share it with another, but you two did.
It was pure chance that I found out about Pete (was on KTAK/KVOW's site for another story) and stumbling upon the report I shared your sense of "there's something odd here" that you wrote about in an earlier post. There was no name, and no charges? I mean, if someone threw a rock off a roof and killed somebody in town what would the law do then? I don't get it. I'm sorry if this topic is a drag, and I don't want to emphasize what must already be painful and frustrating for you - but I do want to validate your feelings and thinking that this doesn't seem right.
You were an excellent instructor/den-mother (I've long forgotten the NOLS term for your position) during a formative crux in my life and, I think, the others' in our group, too. Aside from the technical "how to do stuff" and common sense/KISS lessons, you conveyed lessons on life through words and actions. Things like positive attitude, how to get along with folks in a group setting, and how to make good judgment calls. Somehow I'm pretty sure that these are enduring characteristics that you have to this day, even when you aren't feeling so strong.
So much has already been said, so please accept my condolences - and very best wishes for you, Avery, and all the family on both sides.
Keep the glass half full,
Luca
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Tavis Eddy
climber
Lander
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We are shocked and deeply saddened by the loss of Pete. Words are awkward tools to convey what I feel. What a void we now confront, and I truly struggle to use the past tense. Pete was the smiling one up in the cave at Sinks, working hard on some route, and always cheerful and positive. He would treat your climbing experience as important as his and he wanted those around him to be having the same great day. He would be out skate skiing, having learned it faster than the rest of us. Skiing the entire Loop Road, in either direction, just seemed to be the best way to learn. The way he and Molly and Avery would share a day together, was a great thing to see and be a part of. As we bring a little girl into the world I look to them for the fullness and joy that they shared together outside. What he provided for Avery is a model for me, as I begin fatherhood, and what they shared together is a model for our family.
His life was always so full, so present, so energized, so giving. He loved and made the most of this landscape. We are blessed to celebrate his life in our own, and embrace this great community as we move forward together. We think of you Pete, every step of the way.
Pete was an inspired person. He loved to share in other people’s accomplishments and had a way of making you feel good about yourself. He loved to tell and listen to hunting stories. I shot my first elk last fall and Pete approached me at a party, congratulated me, and wanted to hear my story. He wanted all the details – the setting, conditions, how I tracked the animal, where I placed the shot, etc. etc. etc. As I told my story, he had a gleam in his eyes and he was truly excited for me. I will always appreciate his words and his enthusiasm for my hunt.
He loved to make Avery happy. On several occasions we witnessed him send her flying in harness from Killer Cave after he’d finished some absurdly difficult route. Grinning from ear to ear as Avery laughed with glee. He knew how great it would feel to fly like that, like a bird, weightless, wind in her hair, butterflies in her belly, and relished seeing the excitement in her face.…the joy between them was palpable. It was infectious to watch as we’d all end up smiling from ear to ear. He was an incredible guy.
With much love and sadness,
Tavis, Jules and Ameya.
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Molly Absolon
climber
Lander, Wyoming
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I wish I could write individually to each and everyone of you who have reached out to Avery and me—eventually I hope to, but for now this site will have to suffice. I feel as if we have been enveloped in a circle of love that has reached far beyond the boundaries I had thought defined our life and friends. I cannot begin to tell you how much that circle helps me and helps Avery. It doesn't bring back Pete or take away the pain nor does it stop the tears, but it brings me some kind of solace.
It is good to be back in Lander. And I need to tell you all that at a barbecue on the night of our return, there was another rainbow.
love
Molly
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sister
Social climber
nj
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molly -- glad you are back. This is a reference back to your request for video of Pete. Well, as you know -- Kevin generally has two regular cameras, a video camera and a tripod hanging from his waist at every family event. I remember all the times I was so sick of him taking ONE DARN MORE PICTURE ... well, I am eating crow. Now I see the value ... We will dig around and surely find a gold mine ,,, will keep you posted ... All my love and welcome back -- Sam and Alex say hi to Bravery Avery ... Martha D.
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Mary Absolon
climber
Edina, Minnesota
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Team Absolon Expedition composed of Chris Herber, Pete's nephew and friend Brian Faeth, successfully summited Mt. Rainier at approximately 9 am on Friday, September 7, 2007.
It was a rocky mountain high to say the least! Pete was smiling and saying, "All right, yep, that's my nephew!"
The death of Pete has created greater clarity for us the connection with life and how these adventures create true meaning in our lives. Thank you Pete for being a rock and a beacon for Chris.
Anyone wanting to contact Pete's nephew can email him at chris.herber@du.edu.
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Lander
climber
Boulder
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Hi Molly,
We saw a beautiful rainbow in Boulder tonight and thought of Pete.
Peace and love,
Steph G
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COT
climber
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Sep 10, 2007 - 03:14am PT
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Pete and Avery hiding out from the climbing fashion police in Sinks Canyon
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Zsnowdog
Social climber
Lewisburg, WV
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Sep 11, 2007 - 02:34pm PT
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Hi Molly,
I haven’t seen you for years, yet I was saddened to hear of Peter’s death. Wow. While reading the blog I was reminded of my years in Colorado and working with the Alpine Rescue team, but that’s my story….
I remember being told of your engagement so long ago and then of your marriage. Peter sounded like a great guy. From what I gather he lived deliberately and passionately with the people he loved doing what he loved. I’m sorry I never met him.
One thing that struck me was that I was only a year older than Avery when my father died. I want to share some thoughts with you that may be helpful as you navigate this unexpected path. However, it seems to me that a letter would be a more appropriate format. So, I shall write to you soon.
However, one more thought for this blog….
Kathleen Norris in her book Dakota wrote “ the party’s not over until you’ve told the stories.” I hope, Molly, that you and your friends keep telling the stories. Stories that reveal Peter’s character, his humor, his love.
I hope some will commit those stories to paper and send them to you to keep to give someday to Avery when she is an adult. Right now for Avery he’s just her daddy, but someday she will want to know about the man. 38 years have passed since my father died and I cherish those moments when someone will tell me that they knew my dad and can share their experience of him. Amazing how those glimpses mean so much to me, even after all these years.
Prayerfully,
Amy Kirsten Berg LaFollette
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Molly Absolon
climber
Lander, Wyoming
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Sep 12, 2007 - 04:55pm PT
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It's nice to see people are still posting occasionally. I'm technically challenged at home, although my cousin Peggy is rapidly changing that, but what it means is that I don't get onto email or the internet often. Thanks for everyone who keeps sending pictures and stories...
I dreamed of Pete last night. It was comforting in a strange way although I hated waking up. He told me in the dream he was 98 percent okay but he missed us.
molly
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Cornelia Brefka
climber
Greenwich, CT
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Sep 12, 2007 - 06:57pm PT
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Dear Molly,
I'm so sorry. But he is still with you and Avery.
Love,
Henry (Pete's nephew)
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Michelle L. Escudero
climber
Lander, WY
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Sep 12, 2007 - 11:34pm PT
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Molly,
Today I was in the bathroom as Magda took a bath, swimming from end to end. She sang a song. The words were mainly nonsense. Then she sang, "Pete is dead,....Pete died." I was shocked. I asked her if it was a nice song that would make Avery and Molly happy when we all miss Pete and are so sad. She said yes and continued to sing.
After the bath the conversation continued:
When we could visit Pete?
For sake of trying to avoid the unending questions that were going to follow, he is in heaven.
Where is heaven?
In the stars.
When can we go?
Well, that's the magic part. When you die you learn to fly. And you fly to heaven up in the stars.
Birds go to heaven?
Well, they go to heaven when they die.
When Molly and Avery can go?
Well, they can go in their dreams.
What kind of dreams?
The kind that you wish would never end.
I'm thirsty. Can I have some water, please?
Dream on my friend!!!
Michelle Escudero
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