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John Gregory
Trad climber
washington, dc
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Aug 29, 2007 - 04:40pm PT
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We're trying to put together an event at Seneca Rocks in Pete"s memory. The question is whether to try a weekend in October before the annual party at the Gendarme or wait until November.
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Landerite
Mountain climber
Lander, WY
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Aug 29, 2007 - 06:42pm PT
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When I told my son about Pete's death he got pretty angry and said how bad this was. I pointed out that "WE trundle rocks sometimes" and his quick response was "Yeah, but we make absolutely positively sure that nobody is on or under the cliff, every single time. No exceptions." He's 12.
I think Luke Rodolph ought to make a documentary to post on Youtube that says exactly what he did, that it was reckless behavior, and what the horrible consequences were. Maybe that will temper some kid's judgment some day and save an innocent victim.
I don't care how many tours he did in Iraq. I expect a veteran to be calm, cool and collected and not to do stupid stuff like this.
I'd also like to thank the guy for finally going public and actually apologizing. But don't expect to get invited to dinner or anything.
John Gookin
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Wallace Boever
Social climber
Lincoln
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Aug 29, 2007 - 07:33pm PT
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Dear Molly and Avery, we visited Lander for the first time this August. Our daughter is attending the first class at Wyoming Catholic College. Because the students were taking a 21 day trek through the Wind River Mountains led by NOLS, we stopped at NOLS on August 7th to get a first hand look at things. Though Pete was with some visitors from an outside agency, he came up to us, introduced himself and gave us a guided tour. He listened to our questions and took the time to answer every one. At the end of our visit we asked what role he played at NOLs and we were amazed that someone in his capacity would take the time that he did with us. He then told us about his daughter, Avery. We are deeply saddened by your loss. Please be assured of our prayers for you and Avery and the NOLS community. Wallace and Katy Boever
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mdcheek
climber
wyoming
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Aug 29, 2007 - 07:52pm PT
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Molly and Avery, I keep coming back to this thread over and over and it's taken me this long to write someting, to write anything. Still I can't find the words to write what I really want to say to both of you, and to Pete, so I'll just have to tell a story for now, another story of a trip into the mountains with Pete. Our objective was the South Buttress Right on Mt. Moran in the Tetons. We started by paddling a decrepit inflatable kayak across Leigh Lake that leaked and listed badly to one side. In what must have been a comical scene we arrived at the mouth of Leigh Canyon, two thirty-something men and a bunch of climbing and camping gear sitting in an inflatable boat really meant for one person, up to their waists in water. Pete just chuckled, it didn't seem to matter at all to him that the thing might not get us back across the lake, we were already where the climbing was, we could worry about getting back later.
The next day was classic Pete, early start, brisk pace on the approach, Pete brimming with energy. Of course he offered me the lead when we got to the crux pitch but ultimately it was Pete on the 5.11a tips lieback, oozing water, tenuous smears on polished rock, and only a couple small TCU's for pro. And of course he made it look easy. I was pretty psyched that I only fell once following. Pete's only critique of the route was it wasn't long enough.
We did manage to paddle back across the lake in that stupid inflatable kayak and got stormed out of the mountains the next day but before we got back to Lander we'd climbed a few routes on Blacktail Butte and some other crags, there was just never enough climbing in a weekend for Pete.
Pete, rest easy my friend, we will take good care of Molly and Aves. We miss you.
Molly and Avery, We are here for you now and will be here for you in the days ahead. don't hesitate to lean on us, we need you too.
peace, love and strength to you all, you are in my thoughts constantly. Michael
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neebee
Social climber
calif/texas
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Aug 29, 2007 - 10:52pm PT
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hey there all... just a small note, as to roxjox post-- this is a very kind and humble thing that one could and should choose to do for a family... in the good book, it is mentioned as well...
i must share, but just as bit, as i seek to be polite to all... but i did get a note in my email from a friend of the man involved, politley mentioning that i may have posted to harshly, as to the "restitution" --as if i did not believe the young man had sorrows, too...
i am sorry if he felt that i had judged him--i did not mean it to sound that way, as no one can-or-should judge the inner heart of a man--BUT:
i did judge rightly, that a repentative heart, DOES find a way to bring forth GOOD fruit, as to making a change in the wrong that was done... this is only true and just before god and man...
i did reply as kind as possible--i still feel that it is proper, though, when one does face their actions with sincere sorrows, to REACH OUT to help "pave the way" for others in the future by doing something to "seed" some kind of "good to come" from the wrong... (this does not mean they have to contact the sad family, etc, as this may not be proper, etc....but i mean it as to helping others NOT make these mistakes..)
if it appeared that i "threw a rock" on an innocent party below me, i do appologize and i will not speak more on this issue--BUT:
i do still STAND by my words, as i have seen healed lives come out of helping the future of others to take better courses.... and wisdom, does bring forth fruits to TEACH others of good ways to walk in... that is why we teach our children to take care in their dicisions, etc... how else will folks learn...
and lastly, i too, do forgive the young man, AS he wondered if if was able... forgiveness is very special to god...as the good lord has forgiven me, when i gave my heart to him...
bringing forth good fruit, by repententive-sorrows, is never wrong... i truly will pray that someday, that there will some kind of proper, good, teaching-memorial to keep this in the eyes of others--this is too dangerous and wrong to be ignored...
other good issues in life, regarded teaching preventative safty, concerning all kinds of sports, situations, etc, all becuase someone cared to reach out....
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Mary Absolon
climber
Edina, Minnesota
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Aug 30, 2007 - 12:22am PT
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A loving husband is gone....
A wife mourns & suffers pain.....
A father is lost......
A daughter wants her daddy.....
A family is altered forever.....
A community looses a friend and contributor...
An organization looses a leader & worker.....
An individual remorses for a grave error.....
How will society respond?
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Mark Johnson
climber
Seattle, WA
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Aug 30, 2007 - 10:26am PT
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Like so many I have returned to this forum repeatedly but keep not finding the words to express myself.
So hard to accept the facts of this accident.
I remember one winter as a newer instructor working a winter course with Pete and Molly. It was a delight to observe their married teamwork and a fun trip. Another time on a personal trip with Pete in the Tetons in winter we had just climbed Teewinot and were hiking across a plateau heading towards Mt. Owen. The wind was just cranking. Pete the veteran, I and another climber psyched to be included. From time to time I was asking Pete questions about my upcoming trip to Denali's West Rib. We came to a committing, critical rappel. I kept waiting for more experienced Pete to say something as we went about rigging it. Eventually I wondered aloud about the high winds, we discussed it, and we all agreed to bail. It ended up blowing 100 miles an hour that night. What I most remember about this was even though Pete had more experience and was in an unspoken sense the "leader" of the excursion, he waited for one of us to open the weather discussion. At the end of the trip, I asked Pete if he had any Denali advice. "Just keep climbing and making decisions like this weekend and you'll do fine on the West Rib" was his confidence inspiring answer.
Over subsequent outings both personal and professional I valued Pete as a leader, skilled outdoorsman, and example of how to conduct oneself with integrity and good humor.
What a terrible loss of a fine man.
I am thankful for my experiences with Pete.
Molly I wish you strength.
Mark Johnson
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Andrew Morley
Boulder climber
Boulder, Colorado
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Aug 30, 2007 - 10:32am PT
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Molly,
I wanted to let you know that I sent an email to you yesterday via Sally’s email address. I am thinking about you, Avery and Pete all of the time. I am filled with such sadness for all of you and your families, but particularly for you, my very dear friend. I wish that I were there in Finland to give you a big, long hug, but I’m not, so please know that I am sending you all of my love, prayers and hugs. I too keep coming back to this forum, and am glad it is able to provide some small comfort during such a sad time. We said a prayer for you, Avery and Pete in our church in Boulder on Sunday – I cried for all of you.
I wanted to say to any reporters reading these posts that this forum has provided and continues to provide a place where friends and family can grieve, remember and comfort one another for the loss of a wonderful human being. And while this is an open forum, I think it is important to be respectful of the purpose of this forum and to not publish any of the comments in this forum unless you obtain the consent of Molly, her family or Pete’s family. Enough said.
Molly, all my love and prayers are with you, Avery, Pete and your families.
Andrew
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Crag
Trad climber
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Aug 30, 2007 - 11:48am PT
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Seneca crew - a bunch of us are heading to Seneca on October 11th and will stay through the weekend. This is the only time I/we have to make the trip. If anyone else is going to be there that weekend and wants to toast a few to our mentor Pete you’ll find us on the Front Porch.
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Evel
Trad climber
Nederland
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Aug 30, 2007 - 04:55pm PT
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Wow. Molly, we've never met but please know that I feel awful about Pete. Pete gave me a chance when I was just a kid, the punk who hung around at the Gendarme pestering all of the 'hardmen' to please go climbing. He was the guy who said "let's go!". We were never the best of friends, but I had, and still have a deep respect and admiration for him. What an unfathomable loss. I am so so sad. When I got the news, it felt like a punch to the gut. My Deepest Sympathy goes out to you and Avery. Sincerly, Eric Mix
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Bigdirtball
Trad climber
crozet
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Aug 30, 2007 - 07:11pm PT
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Hi Molly and Avery,
I’m sure we passed like ships in the night. Here are some snapshots from “back in the day” for you….most are Seneca-centric.
I see Pete, one bright summer morning, drinking from a puddle near the Southern Pillar. Incredulous, I am informed that this spring is O.K…. Thereafter I referred to it as Pete’s spring. Gene would give me sh#t about this as we filled our nalgenes at the spring… accusing me of hero worship……in retrospect, may be so.
Mike Cote coasts into the Gendarme one hot afternoon and drops his pack with a resounding thump. “New route”, he says. “Where?”….”to the right of Terminal Velocity”….”Pete led it”….”how was it?” “a death route…small wires…not a chance if you blow it”
A cold morning, we descend into the Reflector Oven at the Rag. There is a skiff of snow on the ledges. Wide awake after the hideous hike and the morning bake, I am astonished to see someone on Krakon. It is Pete…..he’s in the alcove below the technical crux. He boulders up to the crack, down climbs, boulders up, down climbs….he is berating himself. He boulders up again and, reaching high, sticks a cam in the crack. Instantly, he flashes through to a friction stance 15’ higher…..I mean flash….. I mean in seconds…..just a blur of arms and legs. Later in the day, we pass……”2 ˝ friend man, place it and your in there”. I remember being flattered from beta I would probably never use.
What is so rare as day in June…. On the east face of the South Peak, it is 3:00, the sun has crossed the fin….the rock is shaded but still warm. The sky is so blue, the valley is so green. We are working on some idea that there might be a line above Castor. I am slumped on a rock in a small cloud of weed, chalk, and garlic. Uncle Ed appears to be standing on nothing, well above the gear, as usual, “watch me” my gaze pans across Broadway as I look up….and, here comes Pete. He is slinging trees, marching forward, leading his clients to wherever. He pauses at my position, looks up at Ed, looks back at me, we smile, his that curious half-smile… and we say nothing. Nothing needs to be said.
I never knew Pete as a father, husband, Nols persona etc.. We all knew him as a climber whose physical and psychological skills were in a class that contained a very few people.
It should be some consolation to you, Molly, that chance killed Pete. IT would be truly unbelievable if poor judgment was the culprit.
The collective memories of the Seneca dogs, if focused, would almost generate a holographic image.
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Mary Absolon
climber
Edina, Minnesota
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Aug 30, 2007 - 11:52pm PT
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For those who are following the writings on this blog, you know that Pete's nephew, Chris Herber, attended the NOLS Semester in Alaska course this past summer. It was a highlight in his life. Pete chose the course and Pete was instrumental in chosing the instructors - it was fantastic! Chris wants more.....
Our sadness is not being able to talk with Pete about this life experience on our way to the University of Denver from Minneapolis as we were thinking that a Lander stop would be in order for some Uncle-Nephew sharing.
You will not be suprised to learn that Chris will be leaving for Mount Rainier next week for a mountaineering trek. He tells me he is trying to figure out a name for the expedition....stay tuned....& I have a feeling Pete theme will be a guiding light.
Pete....be a rock for my son as he mountaineers Rainier...
Love, Mary
Pete's sister
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sally
climber
Finland
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Aug 31, 2007 - 06:06am PT
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I keep seeing rainbows. It began two weeks before Pete's death, when the three of us took a backpacking trip into Leg Lake Cirque. I remember being so proud of watching Avery jumping from boulder to boulder and rock hopping across streams. She seemed so comfortable in her environment and it made me happy to think of how she'd learned to love the natural world from us. I remember Pete kept having to fish every puddle and pond we passed, which kind of drove me crazy because I wanted to get to camp and drop my pack. And I remember the rainbows—two full double rainbows arcing over the cliffs around Leg Lake. I hadn't seen a rainbow in ages.
Two weeks later, Michelle, Jagoe, our daughters and I went back to our land to leave the beautiful flowers that so many of you sent to us after news of Pete's death. We spread the flowers about, including piling up a bunch on what I'll always think of now as Pete's rock. That little mound of sandstone from which he'd make his speeches. Speeches that kind of embarrassed me at the time, but now make me so proud and sad at the same time. Anyway, as we were sitting on the slickrock and we saw another rainbow. Now I've seen two here in Finland. I'm not sure what to make of them. I'm not sure if they are comforting or ominous. But they seem to be following me.
I was told to write down memories of Pete, but it is hard to do that when the person you are remembering is basically part of you. Pete was my best friend, my climbing partner (more like my guide), my traveling buddy, the father of my beautiful daughter, my confidante, and my lover. So I think instead of what I'm thankful for... I am thankful we got to climb Pingora car-to-car this summer and had the peak to ourselves, cold beer waiting for us back at the truck after 13 hours. I am thankful we rode the Needles Highway in the Black Hills together on our road bikes. I'm thankful Pete donned a tuxedo with a candy pink cumberbund and tie to dance to 'My Girl' and "Ain't no mountain high enough" in Avery's dance recital. I'm thankful that we ate dinner together almost every night and sometimes remembered to pause and give thanks for our health and happiness. I am thankful that Pete never lost patience with my loss of patience. I thankful that he had the strength and desire to take me places I would never have gone without him: Polar Circus, East Temple Spire, Mt. Chardonnett, etc.
I love hearing stories of him. It helps me smile a little bit between the tears. Thank you all.
Molly
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Tedro
Mountain climber
Newport, Rhode Island
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Aug 31, 2007 - 08:07am PT
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Molly,
I only met Pete once many years ago. You brought him to a party at my parents house in West Virginia. I remember very clearly being struck by what a positive, optimistic person he was. I liked Pete immediately. I read these postings and I can see that my first impressions were right on. Obviously, Pete was a big positive force in the world through which he moved. I am sorry I didn't get to know Pete better.
But I do know you, Molly. I know what a strong, optimistic, capable person you are. I know this must be what drew Pete to you. Be strong now Molly. Carry yourself through this terrible tragedy.
As we all are, I will be thinking of you and sending strength your way.
Ted Platz
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MWhite
Social climber
Lander
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Aug 31, 2007 - 10:24am PT
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Hello dear Molly and Avery so far away
It's been such a sad week for me. I miss you two being here in Lander and look forward to your return. Yet, I am glad that you decided to get away for a while and found the strength to do that.
I continue to struggle with finding words to express myself. I feel such anguish that you've lost your great love, and still wake up in disbelief that this tragedy is true.
I think of you often, and will do better to let you know how often you are in my heart. You are an incredibly strong woman, Molly. I know that someday you'll emerge from the depths of your despair. It will be a hard expedition, a journey of challenges and uncertainty, and I and many, many others are going to be beside you as you navigate this new terrain.
But for now, just breath and move to the next moment. That's enough. And know that we're ready in Lander to welcome you home with open arms, hearts and homes.
Love,
Missy
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meggers.
Mountain climber
Newport Beach
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Aug 31, 2007 - 01:00pm PT
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Molly,
I've been thinking of you every day. I have no idea how you are getting through this, but I KNOW you are getting through this. I keep thinking about your broad smille, your fierce intelligence and the deep love and enthusiasm you exude as a way of being. You were one of those couples that just exuded deep love of each other and a deep love of the world. Maybe better said your love for each other seemed to fuel this deep love of the world. And I suppose the reverse is equally true: your love of the world fueled your deep love for each other and Avery. With each person I talk about Pete's death with I say, "You know those couples where it's so clear they love each other, and put each other and their family above everything --above any accomplishment (of which there are many)--but a dedication to love, and the parts of life that matter? They were one of those couples. He was one of those men. And he (and you) one of those people who just FEEL so deeply good it is striking. Your life seems to celebrate the importance of the special small moments between people. You guys knew that. You didn't need death to remind you what the value of life was. You already knew. Which is what makes this all so particularly cruel.
There are certain memories that I keep cycling through and want to write them all down. I don't want to rush them, as I want to try to recall the detail of them and not be in such a flurry that I skip over something.
First of all the two of you were beautiful together. And I don't just mean physcially, but no doubt, that is OBVIOUS. Ok: Molly BEAUTIFUL. Pete: BEAUTIFUL. Avery: BEAUTIFUL. Molly: Gorgeous/HOT. Pete:Handsome/HOT. So much life exuding from both of you, all three of you. Your Christmas card: not some stiff portrait of a family in matching sweaters, but images that document this varied, stimulating, soulful life.
My memory that bubbles up: Avery's first Birthday party. And you and Pete standing at the center of it. First off: the card. Welcoming Avery and celebrating her first cycle around the earth. That said it all. Placing your and her very personal first 365 days in the context of the larger world. It was just a few days after September 11th. We gathered on your land, on that beautiful rock. And I remember Pete welcoming us all, placing the event in context of Avery, of the community of friends, of what was happening in the country. It was one of those moments that just blew me away. And it blew every other birthday party out of the water. It wasn't about some cake, or a creepy clown, or party favors. It was about your new family's understanding, that life is precious, fleeting, and that all the small moments matter. LIke REALLY matter.
You asked us each to bring a poem, or a song, or a story, or anything of significance of her to you. I remember Pete standing there, you standing next to him. And he just oozed love. And right in front of him was Avery in her darling white dress. Looking so girly and sweet and small. Like honoring tradition simultaneouldy combined with creating a party that matched the love of what mattered to you. Standing on that beautiful rock. And Avery was so engaged in it all. Like she was loving it. Like she was being held in this basket of love on this rock, and that her PARENTS were making that happen, creating that bowl of love that she will be held in her whole life. And I remember being struck by Pete. About his presence. This force: this kind, handsome, loving, unassuming yet powerful presence. And I remember thinking, I would never meet a more loving family who was embracing more clearly the richness of life.
And the sun set, and the food came out and the ceremony turned to easy conversation and easy laughter. And I felt so LUCKY to be there. So lucky to know you both.
And then I can't help of thinking about you now, in Finland, wondering how in the world that must be, at this time. I keep thinking about clouds, and weather it's cloudy place, a beautiful place, a beautiful place? Or a beautiful cloudy place?. I remember driving with John one time in Patagonia and he asked, which do you think is better, to feel terrible in a beautiful place or terrible in an ugly place? And I thought then, and do now, I think I would pick the beautiful place.
You know how when you are in Seattle and it's so cloudy, and it seems the world is full of clouds and gray? I think about how, every time I fly out of there, that there is this moment on the plane, that as you fly up, you break through the clouds, and it is nothing but bright sunlight streaming through the windows. But it's so easy to forget when I'm down in the streets of Seattle, where I have this idea that it will always be grey. And I think about that. That I imagine that you might feel the darkness, the clouds, not billowing happy ones, but sad heavy ones full of grief, and profound sadness. But in that same moment, right above us somewhere is bright light. We can't/don't have to be anywhere but where we are, other than right now, but there is sun somewhere above that all. And sometimes just the thought of that comforts me.
More later. My deepest love to you and Avery.
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meggers.
Mountain climber
Newport Beach
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Aug 31, 2007 - 01:02pm PT
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Wati I stupidly forgot to identify myself...
Meggers=Megan Griswold. I forgot to identify myself properly and didn't realize that dumb nickname I picked would be my name on this thing.
I'm an idiot.
xoxo
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KB lander
Trad climber
Lander
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Aug 31, 2007 - 09:25pm PT
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Dear Molly & Avery,
We are so excited and happy to see you both soon. The entire community has felt a bigger hole with you both gone. Of course, we continue to grieve and feel like a knee-to-the-stomach punch daily when we think about the loss of Pete. We miss him more than words can express, but, I'm assuming you hurt much more.
We can only imagine your sense of loss.
So, to move forward, we have an entire fall of activities, chores and adventures planned. In case you were not planning on staining the home, we are planning on it, in addition to coffee time, bike rides, long dinners and short cry sessions.
Please come home soon. We are waiting with hearts and arms open wide.
Peace, love & heart (that's the Canadian word for love) - KB
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3rd sister
Social climber
Montpelier, Vermont
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Molly,
I've never known rainbows to be ominous... to me they are about hope and magic and beauty, a bridge between this world and beyond, wherever beyond may be.
love,
Ann
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Cornelia Brefka
climber
Greenwich, CT
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Dear Molly,
I hope that being at Sally's wedding gave you joy rather than making you more sad, and that Avery had fun being a flower girl.
It's a beautiful weekend here and while I still feel so sad, I keep seeing Pete's smiling face in my head, and that makes me cry AND smile.
Love you-
Cornelia
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