Discussion Topic |
|
This thread has been locked |
High Fructose Corn Spirit
Gym climber
Full Silos of Iowa
|
|
From the Grand Bible:
We've identified a species called Hydrocarbon Man who lives on the strength of an oil supply beneath him. His days are numbered. When cheap oil ends, panic will ensue, societies will collapse and the earth's carrying capacity of 6.5 billion will drop to 1.5 billion. So prepare. (Ends of Eras 8:3-4)
|
|
jstan
climber
|
|
Don¹t Let the Dog L!ck Your Privates
Things You Never Thought You'd Say
Tuesday, January 12, 2010
by STARSHINE ROSHELL
I'm what they call a word person, preferring "viridian" to dreary ³green,² and never uttering
"confused" when "flummoxed" is within reach.
An English major whose motif-musing and allusion-hunting skills have proven all but useless in
the real world, I take admittedly odd delight in the careful craft of sentence-smithing. One of my
prized possessions is a tome titled The Highly Selective Thesaurus for the Extraordinarily
Literate, and I fling myself from bed each morning to savor my Word of the Day email from
dictionary.com‹a wellspring of toothsome terms like numinous, doff, and foofaraw. I challenge
myself to use each new word in conversation before the week is over, and just never you mind
whether I'm successful or not. The point is I want to.
Which is why I find parenting to be a bit of a bore. As a mother, 87 percent of the sentences that
spring from my mouth are vapid. Artless. In fact, they border on asinine. And most of them
should go without saying: "Stop hitting yourself." "Get your jacket out of the peanut butter." "No
spitting in Mommy's bed." There's the perennial, "You must use a tissue for that," and the all-
too-frequent, "Well, would you like it if I called you an oogie bananahead?" I recently heard
myself say, "We never, ever lick the bottoms of our shoes." And I wondered what the devil had
become of my dexterity for discourse‹let alone my children's common sense.
I realize that human beings aren't born with an aptitude for basic hygiene and social etiquette,
and mine are no exception. Friends tell me they've been shocked to have to articulate these
instructions to their offspring: "Stop picking your sister's nose." "Please don't hump your pillow in
front of other people." "Do not throw the cat in there again."
Others never thought they'd have to say this: "Yes, underwear is a requirement at the dinner
table. Particularly when you're not wearing pants." Or this: "If you went pee-pee in the bathwater,
you probably should not be drinking it." One mom recently found herself offering this string of
seemingly self-evident edicts: "Get your hands out of your pants" Š "Get your hands out of her
pants" Š "Go wash your hands."
I have faith our kids will memorize all of these rules eventually, and that there will be no need to
whisper "stop pulling up your shirt" as they walk down the aisle. (If there is, at least we'll be able
to employ more graceful language by then, such as, "Darling, do refrain from exposing your
thorax. It's entirely inappropriate to both the venue and occasion.")
Meanwhile, though, I confess I'm disappointed with my role as Declarer of the Dull Directive.
Deficient in other motherly assets, I always assumed that my love of language would compensate
for my lack of patience and my distaste for holiday handicraft. Indeed, my favorite parenting
moments‹the few that leave me feeling especially well-equipped for this job‹are when my kids
ask me to explain an abstract concept like death or sarcasm or sponge cake and I can discharge
a chain of images and metaphors that leave them sitting silent, their eyes shifting and unfocused
as they process the description, and then lead them to a clear-as-a-windowpane, "Oh!"
So forgive me if flinging phrases like, "Don't let the dog l!ck your privates" feels like wasting the
paltry parental proficiency I possess. And not just wasting it, either. Squandering! Nay, fribbling
it away like so much worthless foofaraw!
I'm sorry. But it had to be said.
|
|
Gobee
Trad climber
Upward Bound Col. 1:19-20 Grace By Faith
|
|
Acts 2:17-21, “‘And in the last days it shall be, God declares,
that I will pour out my Spirit on all flesh,
and your sons and your daughters shall prophesy,
and your young men shall see visions,
and your old men shall dream dreams;
18 even on my male servants and female servants
in those days I will pour out my Spirit, and they shall prophesy.
19 And I will show wonders in the heavens above
and signs on the earth below,
blood, and fire, and vapor of smoke;
20 the sun shall be turned to darkness
and the moon to blood,
before the day of the Lord comes, the great and magnificent day.
21 And it shall come to pass that everyone who calls upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.’
|
|
High Fructose Corn Spirit
Gym climber
Full Silos of Iowa
|
|
From the Grand Bible:
"All that's required for bronze age ignorance to prevail is for informed believers to do nothing." (Cascott 3:16)
Hadrian: Brick by brick.
Ghandi: Be the change you seek in the world.
|
|
Gobee
Trad climber
Upward Bound Col. 1:19-20 Grace By Faith
|
|
HFCS, Full Silos of Iowa...
Luke 12:13-21, Someone in the crowd said to him, “Teacher, tell my brother to divide the inheritance with me.” 14 But he said to him, “Man, who made me a judge or arbitrator over you?” 15 And he said to them, “Take care, and be on your guard against all covetousness, for one's life does not consist in the abundance of his possessions.” 16 And he told them a parable, saying, “The land of a rich man produced plentifully, 17 and he thought to himself, ‘What shall I do, for I have nowhere to store my crops?’ 18 And he said, ‘I will do this: I will tear down my barns (SILOS) and build larger ones, and there I will store all my grain and my goods. 19 And I will say to my soul, Soul, you have ample goods laid up for many years; relax, eat, drink, be merry.’ 20 But God said to him, Fool! This night your soul is required of you, and the things you have prepared, whose will they be?’ 21 So is the one who lays up treasure for himself and is not rich toward God.”
|
|
Gobee
Trad climber
Upward Bound Col. 1:19-20 Grace By Faith
|
|
Proverbs 5:21-23, For a man's ways are before the eyes of the Lord,
and he ponders all his paths.
22 The iniquities of the wicked ensnare him,
and he is held fast in the cords of his sin.
23 He dies for lack of discipline,
and because of his great folly he is led astray.
|
|
Gobee
Trad climber
Upward Bound Col. 1:19-20 Grace By Faith
|
|
Revelation 22:18-19, I warn everyone who hears the words of the prophecy of this book: if anyone adds to them, God will add to him the plagues described in this book, 19 and if anyone takes away from the words of the book of this prophecy, God will take away his share in the tree of life and in the holy city, which are described in this book.
|
|
cintune
climber
the Moon and Antarctica
|
|
It's only talk.
|
|
elcap-pics
climber
Crestline CA
|
|
Proverbs 23:13 "Withhold not correction from the child: for if thou beatest him with the rod, he shall not die."
Proverbs 20:30 "The blueness of a wound cleanseth away evil."
Nice to have justification for beating your child black and blue!! Good Christian teaching!
|
|
'Pass the Pitons' Pete
Big Wall climber
like Ontario, Canada, eh?
|
|
Tom,
Those two verses are not related in any way, and come from two different places. It's scarcely a justification.
As for "the rod", if you study the ancient Hebrew, that phrase is generally believed to be a figure of speech for discipline of any kind, and not necessarily corporal punishment.
|
|
High Fructose Corn Spirit
Gym climber
Full Silos of Iowa
|
|
As for "the rod"...
Lame.
Yeah, and a "day" really doesn't mean a day. And "fear" really doesn't mean fear. And "divinity" really doesn't mean divinity. And...
|
|
elcap-pics
climber
Crestline CA
|
|
Sure doesn't read that way Pete! What do you not understand about "beatest him with the rod"? Does "beatest" not mean hit with something? And the word rod does not mean a stick or staff? As in thy rod and thy staff they comfort me?
A better argument for you Pete would be.... well back in those days people did things differently than we do now and what was once acceptable behavior is no longer.
Like today Exodus 31:15 "Whosoever doeth any work in the sabbath day, he shall surely be put to death", is unacceptable and I hope most Christians would reject such an idea, even though it is part of god's perfect book!
|
|
Gobee
Trad climber
Upward Bound Col. 1:19-20 Grace By Faith
|
|
John 15:1-17, “I am the true vine, and my Father is the vinedresser. 2 Every branch in me that does not bear fruit he takes away, and every branch that does bear fruit he prunes, that it may bear more fruit. 3 Already you are clean because of the word that I have spoken to you. 4 Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit by itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in me. 5 I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing. 6 If anyone does not abide in me he is thrown away like a branch and withers; and the branches are gathered, thrown into the fire, and burned. 7 If you abide in me, and my words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you. 8 By this my Father is glorified, that you bear much fruit and so prove to be my disciples. 9 As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Abide in my love. 10 If you keep my commandments, you will abide in my love, just as I have kept my Father's commandments and abide in his love. 11 These things I have spoken to you, that my joy may be in you, and that your joy may be full.
12 “This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you. 13 Greater love has no one than this that someone lay down his life for his friends. 14 You are my friends if you do what I command you. 15 No longer do I call you servants, for the servant does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends, for all that I have heard from my Father I have made known to you. 16 You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you that you should go and bear fruit and that your fruit should abide, so that whatever you ask the Father in my name, he may give it to you. 17 These things I command you, so that you will love one another.
|
|
guido
Trad climber
Santa Cruz/New Zealand/South Pacific
|
|
Anybody seen my bible, I left it here on ST couple of days ago?
|
|
Gobee
Trad climber
Upward Bound Col. 1:19-20 Grace By Faith
|
|
Colossians 2:8-10, See to it that no one takes you captive by philosophy and empty deceit, according to human tradition, according to the elemental spirits of the world, and not according to Christ. 9 For in him the whole fullness of deity dwells bodily, 10 and you have been filled in him, who is the head of all rule and authority.
Matthew 5:17-20, “Do not think that I have come to abolish the Law or the Prophets; I have not come to abolish them but to fulfill them. 18 For truly, I say to you, until heaven and earth pass away, not an iota, not a dot, will pass from the Law until all is accomplished. 19 Therefore whoever relaxes one of the least of these commandments and teaches others to do the same will be called least in the kingdom of heaven, but whoever does them and teaches them will be called great in the kingdom of heaven. 20 For I tell you, unless your righteousness exceeds that of the scribes and Pharisees, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven.
|
|
'Pass the Pitons' Pete
Big Wall climber
like Ontario, Canada, eh?
|
|
"As in thy rod and thy staff they comfort me?"
Tom, there are a couple things to perhaps consider - first what you are reading in any bible is a translation. Just because some tranlator chose to translate a certain Hebrew word into a certain word in English doesn't mean that the English word is the final say. If you want to understand what the writer was trying to say, then you need to look at the root word. In your example from Proverbs above, the root word from which "rod" is translated more likely refers metaphorically to corrective discipline in a loving way, as a loving father disciplines his children, and not necessarily striking someone.
Secondly, just because you choose two verses that sort of sound the same, from two different places, doesn't mean they have anthing to do with each other.
Furthermore, I think you might be missing the bit about the rod and staff from the 23rd psalm. The whole psalm is a profession of joyful trust in the Lord as the good shepherd-king. Back in the day, the term "shepherd" was widely used as a metaphor for kings in the Near East, and also in Israel. So here the Psalmist, probably David, acknowledges that the Lord is his shepherd-king. I like the bit where he says that "he makes me lie down in green pastures", because sheep only lie down when they feel contented and secure.
Now in this case, the "rod" isn't just an instrument of the shepherd-king's authority, it is also something used by shepherds for counting, guiding, rescuing and protecting their sheep. Hence the comfort.
Now your quote from Exodus about not working on the Sabbath is something I am sure many non-Christians [and lots of Christians] can find perplexing. Basically, the idea is that when you are a Christian, you are saved by faith and get to live in grace, rather than under the law. But understanding which laws no longer apply [you get to eat bacon] and which laws still do [that shalt not kill] can be mystifying part.
Yeah, HFCS, "fear" doesn't really mean fear. Fear is the word the translators used, but it is more accurately translated as a loving respect and reverence and trust kinda thing.
Cheers,
PTL & PTP Pete
|
|
WandaFuca
Social climber
From the gettin place
|
|
Trying to explain that this part of the bible is literal, but this part is metaphor, and this part is no longer relevant because of Jesus (nevermind what it says about the nature of your god that it once was relevant), and topping it all off by insisting that said bible is a divinely inspired book and therefore an infallible source, can leave you looking like this picture of Pete . . .
. . . of course the clusters Pete creates on El Cap would make him look this way even if he weren't a christian . . .
Edit: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Biblical_inerrancy
|
|
'Pass the Pitons' Pete
Big Wall climber
like Ontario, Canada, eh?
|
|
Hey! That looks just like one of my belays!
Who ever said the bible is infalliable?
|
|
Gobee
Trad climber
Upward Bound Col. 1:19-20 Grace By Faith
|
|
Mark 6:12, So they went out and proclaimed that people should repent.
Acts 4:12, And there is salvation in no one else, for there is no other name (Jesus) under heaven given among men by which we must be saved.”
|
|
|
SuperTopo on the Web
|
Let us know!