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johntp
Trad climber
Little Rock and Loving It
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Sep 28, 2018 - 11:05pm PT
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Really? Hasn't this been beaten to death already?
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John M
climber
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Sep 28, 2018 - 11:08pm PT
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I thought that I would summarize what I understand about your current situation. If you feel like it, please correct anything that I summarize.
So this is what I understand about you. I hope that I am not being too intrusive in listing it all together. ( If you want me to delete, then I will ).
You deal with being Bi-polar.
You had an accident from which you have not fully recovered. (Climbing related? )
You have fairly severe sensitivities to chemicals.
You are not sure if you can work again or how much you will be able to work. ( more details about that would help. Do you genuinely believe that you might not be able to work or is your concern/fear in part driven by the nature of being bipolar. Sincere question and I do not mean to be harsh. )
You have done some type of remote work online which can be lucrative if you are able to work and can get it. Would this mean that you would be eligible for social security at some point, and could you get disability now? I don't know how immigrant status works.
You are a female over 45. Care to share your actual age? That would help in figuring out your retirement angles. How close you might be to something like social security and medicare.
You are worried about future and current healthcare costs as you age.
You prefer cold to heat. You grew up in rural russia in the cold cold. ( I believe ) You do not tolerate heat well.
You have something north of 200 k in savings.
You want a rural property on which you can live simply by growing food and having animals, but also with access to electricity and internet of some sort.
You prefer rural because noise is an issue for you and privacy, plus you want to grow food and have animals like chickens. I believe in part you are seeking that because of cost, but also to help you with your health. Less pesticides, less chemical exposure.
Edit: to add. you don't really want to move back to Russia, but you feel like your financial and health situation are forcing you to.
Is this mostly accurate? I'm not certain that I have any advice for you, it just helps me to think about a problem if I have it listed.
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ECF
Big Wall climber
Ridgway CO
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Sep 29, 2018 - 03:51am PT
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It doesn’t matter where she goes, the negativity will follow.
Every post is “I can’t”, “ not allowed”, too this or that... all negative.
When everything good is defined by what it is not, you are focusing on the negatives.
Take a trip to Russia, I guarantee it is not how you remember it.
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John M
climber
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Sep 29, 2018 - 07:54am PT
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ECF... try putting yourself in her shoes. Can you do that? Do you know what its like to have chronic health issues that can have very poor solutions and sometimes no solution? Do you know what its like to not know if you can ever work again and to be faced with trying to figure out how you will survive? Can you get there? Do you now what it is like in this country to live in poverty? She isn't there yet, but if her health problems are severe she isn't that far from it. Certainly not in this country. Do you have any idea how far 200 k will go if her health problems worsen in any way? Even with great insurance, my health care bills over my life have left me in poverty. Its certainly a better kind of poverty then many first world countries. I have a roof over my head and food to eat and I have a computer through which I get internet off a neighbors service. But without help from my parents I would have been homeless, and I am one major car problem away from not having a vehicle. Even a minor problem can be difficult.
Have you read the advice people have given her on this forum? For as smart as people are on this forum, its as though they are talking about a different planet. Which part of not working right now and not certain if she can work again did people not understand? Do they realize that if you aren't working, you can't immigrate to most countries? She hopes to be able to work, but that doesn't cut it with most countries? If she isn't able to work, how does she afford a property over 50 k, which is what most people here suggested, and still keep herself going? My own suggestion was ignorant because I didn't look into how she would get water to the property. It didn't have a well and doesn't appear to have city water, so how would she grow food? Truck in water? Good grief. That would be expensive. So she negated my advice. Should I then see her has negative? Or was it simply that I didn't look hard enough?
And which part of medical costs in America don't people seem to understand? Its hugely expensive here if you have chronic issues. There are many treatments that I would have tried if I could have afforded them. She is likely facing the same thing, and when you have health problems that are intractable, then you don't know when the costs will end. Who would help her here in America? Would you?
My god man. To focus on the fact that she has researched this through and through and hasn't found a good answer and to say that that is her being negative when the solutions that have been offered seem to not even remotely understand her problem is just plain ignorant and frankly heartless.
Thats what I have found in America. People are just plain clueless about what it costs to deal with chronic health issues and how difficult it is to get help in America. Good grief man, they are talking about doing away with the protections that were recently won to help people with pre existing conditions have health insurance. If they do that she won't be able to afford health insurance in America. Do you have ANY idea what that means? Can you imagine her situation and trying to figure out how to get health care if you don't have health insurance because she gets priced out of it if the protections against pre existing conditions are removed. She could easily blow through her money and then still have health problems. Do you understand that? Do you understand just how scary that is?
Your attitude is one of someone who hasn't been there and doesn't understand and views the world as a pollyanna. America is great so whats her problem seem to be many peoples attitude. Good grief. I love America, but sometimes her people just seem to be clueless and yet they act as though they have it all figured out and anyone who nay says it is just being negative. Try putting yourself in her shoes.
I apologize if you have been there, but you don't say that you have, so its hard to know. Have you faced chronic health issues that have lasted longer then 20 years?
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clifff
Mountain climber
golden, rollin hills of California
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Sep 29, 2018 - 09:26am PT
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$30,000 1200 sq ft house swimming pool!
https://www.zillow.com/homes/for_sale/CA/pmf,pf_pt/234674777_zpid/9_rid/owner-financing-_att/globalrelevanceex_sort/43.121033,-119.610901,40.094882,-124.532776_rect/7_zm/
$20,000 10 acres
https://www.zillow.com/homes/for_sale/CA/pmf,pf_pt/2089265219_zpid/9_rid/owner-financing-_att/globalrelevanceex_sort/43.121033,-119.610901,40.094882,-124.532776_rect/7_zm/
Here's a real nice one: 40 acres that you can subdivide in 10 acre lots to recover maybe all or more of the initial cost. $70,000. Beautiful forest.
https://www.zillow.com/homes/for_sale/CA/pmf,pf_pt/2090586048_zpid/9_rid/owner-financing-_att/globalrelevanceex_sort/43.121033,-119.610901,40.094882,-124.532776_rect/7_zm/
Montana - $100,000 3 acres 1500 sq ft house hi speed internet
https://www.zillow.com/homes/for_sale/pmf,pf_pt/2098430257_zpid/owner-financing-_att/globalrelevanceex_sort/48.945955,-103.879853,47.598755,-106.34079_rect/8_zm/
"Work from home with the reliable fiber optic internet," 20 acres 1344 sq ft house $145,000 (maybe subdivide some of it and get alot $ back.)
https://www.zillow.com/homes/for_sale/pmf,pf_pt/2088761038_zpid/owner-financing-_att/globalrelevanceex_sort/49.841525,-101.771851,44.335636,-111.615601_rect/6_zm/
Golden Glacier Parklands Lot 37
Babb, MT 59411
1.49 acres
Lot/Land
$59,500
https://www.zillow.com/homes/for_sale/pmf,pf_pt/2109716815_zpid/owner-financing-_att/globalrelevanceex_sort/50.774682,-108.264771,45.371443,-118.108521_rect/6_zm/
https://www.zillow.com/homes/for_sale/pmf,pf_pt/2106683926_zpid/owner-financing-_att/globalrelevanceex_sort/49.260635,-115.135346,47.921864,-117.596283_rect/8_zm/
https://www.zillow.com/homes/for_sale/pmf,pf_pt/2094694546_zpid/owner-financing-_att/globalrelevanceex_sort/49.260635,-115.135346,47.921864,-117.596283_rect/8_zm/
https://www.zillow.com/homes/for_sale/pmf,pf_pt/2108775856_zpid/owner-financing-_att/globalrelevanceex_sort/49.162849,-116.755829,47.821454,-119.216766_rect/8_zm/
https://www.zillow.com/homes/for_sale/pmf,pf_pt/2117989379_zpid/owner-financing-_att/globalrelevanceex_sort/49.162849,-116.755829,47.821454,-119.216766_rect/8_zm/
https://www.zillow.com/homes/for_sale/pmf,pf_pt/2088289856_zpid/owner-financing-_att/globalrelevanceex_sort/49.163746,-116.755829,47.822376,-119.216767_rect/8_zm/
7 acres $14,000 cool Washington - Canada border
https://www.zillow.com/homes/for_sale/pmf,pf_pt/2087773157_zpid/owner-financing-_att/globalrelevanceex_sort/49.079263,-117.17537,48.411884,-118.405839_rect/9_zm/
cool little cabin in beautiful mountains $48,000
https://www.zillow.com/homes/for_sale/pmf,pf_pt/84763994_zpid/owner-financing-_att/globalrelevanceex_sort/49.419014,-120.051727,48.084501,-122.512665_rect/8_zm/
https://www.zillow.com/homes/for_sale/pmf,pf_pt/59_rid/0_singlestory/64.867608,-58.40332,20.756114,-137.15332_rect/3_zm/1_p/
here's a map of land and homes for less than $75k on lots bigger than 1 acre around North Dakota:
https://www.zillow.com/homes/for_sale/pmf,pf_pt/0-75000_price/0-305_mp/43560-_lot/globalrelevanceex_sort/50.155785,-95.377808,44.684277,-105.221558_rect/6_zm/
Find someone to team up with to share costs. Get some room mates after you get the place. (esp workable in college area)
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Trump
climber
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Sep 29, 2018 - 09:31am PT
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No I’ve never been black, but I still try to imagine what it’s like to be black and to formulate perspectives that include what I think it must be like to be black.
Sorry if we fall short of being able to completely imagine what her life is like, and the challenges she faces. I probably fall short of the same thing with my black kids.
But folks have honestly tried to help her.
She’s the expert on her. If she can’t find a solution, and the people who are spending their time thinking about her situation and posting to this thread in order to try to help her, can’t help her, then she’s not gonna improve unless she finds a solution that she can get behind. That’s a bummer for all of us, but probably mostly for her.
I’ve wished her well several times, and many people have offered suggestions, and she’s offered back problems with all of them. Ok, there are probably problems with everything.
And if she can’t avoid herself slipping into poverty, that’s a bummer. I hope my kids and their birth relatives are able to avoid that, and I hope she can too.
Median net worth of white American families is $171,000. Median net worth of black American families is $17,600.
https://www.federalreserve.gov/econres/notes/feds-notes/recent-trends-in-wealth-holding-by-race-and-ethnicity-evidence-from-the-survey-of-consumer-finances-20170927.htm
What’s her individual net worth - $200,000?
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John M
climber
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Sep 29, 2018 - 10:20am PT
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That’s a bummer for all of us, but probably mostly for her.
really? its a bummer for you? you spent 10 minutes of your life and it didn't seem to help and now you are bummed?
um.. uh.. well, at least you recognize that it might be worse for her.
Sorry you are bummed. life sure is hard. aint it.
you climb 5.2 yet?
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John M
climber
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Sep 29, 2018 - 10:52am PT
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and most people have no idea what its like to deal with chronic health issues. they don't even seem to know the basics about bipolar, which is that it is a cycle, part of which is DEPRESSON. which would account for how she responds. I think that she is doing a damn good job of being decent even though people have called her a troll and now say that she is too negative.
You have read about her for all of a few minutes and you are certain that she is just too negative.
She has likely dealt with being bipolar for most of her life. She managed to immigrate from a country like Russia and while dealing with being bipolar she managed to save 200 k, something which most Americans who are healthy can't even do. Bipolar isn't something that just happens overnight.
She is facing a very uncertain future, but in your opinion she is too negative because she didn't glowingly respond to suggestions that she has looked at and which don't appear to work.
all right. I would say that is pretty ignorant, but you have a right to your opinion.
By the way.. many well respected and well liked climbers have killed themselves because they couldn't deal with being bipolar. But yea. she has survived and even saved money but in your opinion she is too negative Got it.
Maybe.. just maybe she is being realistic and that is the only way that she can survive knowing herself and her limitations.
For years I had people tell me about depression. People who had been depressed because their dog died. They were certain that they knew what it was like. uh huh. Much like a 5.2 climber telling someone about to climb K2 what to do.
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John M
climber
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Sep 29, 2018 - 11:17am PT
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Look.
some of the people on this thread have been very kind and decent. I fully acknowledge that and appreciate it. But some people have said things that are utterly ridiculous and indicate either a level of malice, or willful ignorance that is difficult for me to ignore because I have had to put up with it with my own situation.
Former climber, I apologize if I have derailed your thread or made things more difficult for you. I hope the best for you.
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hailman
Trad climber
Ventura, CA
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Sep 29, 2018 - 06:25pm PT
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I haven't been following this super closely....but gathered a couple details:
you're looking for rural living?
less regulation?
long cold winter?
have you looked at Western Wisconsin?
I have very fond memories of running around my grandparents' farm in Warrens, Wisconsin as a kid. They had a lot of land and practiced a fair bit of subsistence farming. They were very old school having lived through the Depression as kids themselves.
People in towns like Warrens are very friendly and everyone knows each other. I miss the old farm.
Hope ya find what you're looking for!
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formerclimber
Boulder climber
CA
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Jan 22, 2019 - 01:22pm PT
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hailman, John M and Mei - thanks a lot for your thoughts, I appreciate the messages.
John M -- no I don't really pay attention to negative things said here, I'm quite used to hatred and bias (this reflects on them, not on me). These people, who tell me to go home, etc, might actually soon end up being sorry for themselves, not for me...with the economy forecast and their kids themselves being told to "go back to Europe", without repercussions.
Most people fail to see what'd happened to the US and where this is all heading, sadly. Back in the day I predicted collapse of Soviet Union (which I later helped to overthrow), and was laughed at: shortsightedness doesn't surprise me.
Both the US and Russia are not nice places to be right now, oppressive and war-hungry, not much concerned with their own citizens well-being and on totalitarian track, with few oligarchs having extreme power and greed being the main philosophy.
(don't worry about me, I'll find my corner of the world permanently away form humans, somewhere in the Balkans or in the North Maine woods, I'm looking... polako, mañana)
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aspendougy
Trad climber
Los Angeles, CA
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Jan 22, 2019 - 02:39pm PT
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Dear Friend:
When deciding to relocate to another country, it is helpful to see where other American ex-pats are flocking to, why they go there, and what they say about their experiences. As an example, Ecuador is popular right now. Low cost of living, good as far as crime and personal safety, good food, enough amenities to feel comfortable, nice climate, etc. One thing to consider, as one gets older, most people dislike the cold, and want to be where it's warmer. There are some temperate locations in the South, but when I think Russia, two words that come to mind are "North" and "Cold."
Personally, I don't find the oppressive and warmongering aspect of the U.S. politics has much of any effect upon my personal happiness. True it is especially bad right now, but politicians come and go so quickly.
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formerclimber
Boulder climber
CA
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Jan 22, 2019 - 07:00pm PT
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Equador is crime ridden. I'd be afraid to get off the plane there.
There're kidnappings and people live behind bars in their own homes. I know well what's going on there. Expats will tell you any BS to sell their worthless property they're stuck with (and South America RE is overpriced as hell). They don't even report crime to police there, out of fear. Wouldn't want to be the next gringo roasted "cuz they're all rich".
Choices of typical American expats puzzle me and I'm not one of them anyway.
Like I said, I'll find a place permanently away from humans somewhere in the Balkans or North Maine woods.
By "oppressive" I meant not just politics but all aspects of life at this point, it's Orwell 1984 now.
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Reilly
Mountain climber
The Other Monrovia- CA
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Jan 22, 2019 - 11:09pm PT
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afraid to get off the plane there
Surely you jest!
Ecuador is FAR BETTER than you make it out to be. Yes, one must exercise caution and be
aware but where is that not necessary? Its tourism industry is booming - hardly likely if it was
as bad as you make out. Planning a trip there myself soon I hope.
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fear
Ice climber
hartford, ct
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Jan 23, 2019 - 06:58am PT
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....I'll find a place permanently away from humans....
Or maybe figure out why you feel like that rather than attempting to run away which isn't likely to work.
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capseeboy
Social climber
portland, oregon
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Jan 23, 2019 - 09:08am PT
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You can run but you can't hide for long. Live out of your car until you have made up your mind. Cheers!
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Splater
climber
Grey Matter
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Jan 23, 2019 - 11:16am PT
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Reilly "One thing I’m willing to bet on is that the Roosky Border officers will be more welcoming "
And they may bestow upon you a special thumbdrive with valuable contents!
And then provide you a unique stay with room and board!
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formerclimber
Boulder climber
CA
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Jan 23, 2019 - 01:27pm PT
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fear: "Or maybe figure out why you feel like that rather than attempting to run away which isn't likely to work."
--why does it bother you? Mind your life.
I want nothing to do with humans or society for a long time . In fact I already live this way for years. Just need to get further away from you busybuddies, somewhere to the end of the long dirt road where ya'd never go.
Enjoy your life, the way you like it -- just don't tell others how to live theirs.
Buh bye.
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formerclimber
Boulder climber
CA
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Jan 23, 2019 - 01:28pm PT
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Moose, sacrasm and immature mocking not appreciated: why do you flaming libs want to force everyone to live exactly like you and have a problem with people living like they want to? You shouldn't.
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formerclimber
Boulder climber
CA
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Jan 23, 2019 - 01:31pm PT
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capseeboy: "You can run but you can't hide for long. Live out of your car until you have made up your mind. Cheers!"
Boo hoo, little envious mouth....I'm living in La Jolla right now, where you probably can't afford to live.
You oversocialized boys, why do ya always need others around ya, to live?
Helpless much? Go punch instagram buttons, ya social queens.
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