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John Gans
climber
Lander, Wyoming
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Aug 15, 2007 - 08:25pm PT
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We were so distraught to hear the news of Pete on Sunday morning. Our family was traveling in Ecuador …. something I imagined that Pete, Molly and Avery would be doing at some point. We headed for home with lots of airplane time to think about Pete.
I first met Pete 20 years ago in Alaska. He traveled North to visit Molly. I remember first talking to him as he sat on the couch in the NOLS Alaska house. There were many impressions from that first meeting. The first of those was how interested he was in Molly…. he certainly seemed to hope that this Alaska visit would make an impression on Molly. Pete struck me as an individual who was both very low-keyed (sprawled on the couch) and yet very intense. He struck me as patient and yet driven. He struck me as the “common man” and yet such a rare one. Now 20 years later, I still have all of the same complex impressions of Pete.
At NOLS, we were very lucky that Pete joined our community in advancing our mission. He was a talented and dedicated member of our staff. I saw him work his way through various positions at NOLS, sometimes getting the next job and at other times not getting it. When he was turned down he was always graceful and always wondering how he could better himself. That philosophy led him to the position of directing our largest school. Where others saw problems, Pete saw opportunities. He was creative, patient and fun.
Even though he wasn’t born at the right time, I always thought that Pete was the guy that Norman Rockwell was painting. He was the All American Kid that grew up to be a model citizen of our world. I will still see his face in many a Rockwell painting.
At the end of the day I often found myself in the office after others had cleared out. It was very common to run into Pete at that time, as he was sneaking is a bit more work before heading home. At those times Pete would talk about Avery and Molly. He was always anxious to get home and see them. He would often ask me about adventures for kids when the kids would get older. He was truly very dedicated to family.
While Pete and all of us are visitors to the mountains, he was not a visitor to our organization and our community. He has forever changed NOLS and all of us affiliated with it, for the better. His lessons in patience, hard work, passion for the mountains and passion for our organization are all lessons we must carry forward.
Our thoughts and prayers are with you Molly, Avery, Pete’s family, Molly’s family, Steve, and this extended family/community.
Pete I thank you for your many gifts!!
John Gans
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GTRoan
Trad climber
Falls Church, VA
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Aug 15, 2007 - 09:52pm PT
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Dear Molly and Avery and all of Pete's friends,
It has been 10-15 years since I last spoke to Pete at Seneca Rocks. But I remember him as one of the most likeable, cordial, and upbeat people I have ever known. I knew Pete mostly in his early guide years when he worked for the Gendarme at Seneca. He possessed irrepressable optimism and great humor. I remember a time when Bob Berger and I visited him at his Seneca home after a mountain bike accident. Pete had gone head first over the handlebars on his way home on a back trail from the Gendarme. He was a mess--cut up all over his face and in a lot of pain. It did not dent Pete's positive attitude one iota. He was his usual cheery self. He thanked us for stopping by to see how he was, and he could not stop offering us suggestions on what to climb that day. We all will miss him.
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usedtoclimb
Mountain climber
Madison, WI
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Aug 15, 2007 - 10:03pm PT
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Molly and dear friends-
I keep thinking today about Pete's broad smile and the way his laugh sounded in the halls of the RMB. We're sending our thoughts and hopes that you find moments of peace in the next few weeks earnestly across the heartland to the Lander folks we love so much.
Fondly, Tim, Pam and Clara Felt
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Robin & Chris
climber
Missoula
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Aug 15, 2007 - 11:26pm PT
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For the past 20+ years I haven't seen much of Pete. Occasionnaly, I had the pleasure of seing him and Molly as they passed through Missoula on their way to a climb. When Molly and Robin (my wife) went to school in Berkeley in the late 1980s, I got to know him. I really don't have a note of some outing we went on (although there were many in those days). What I do want to share though is what Pete was like, or at least what I beleive he was like.
Pete was one of those people that brought kindness and a sense of warmth to the world. He was always offering encouragement to people. He had a mischovous smile and kid-like glint in his eye. He wasn't loud or self absorbed, yet he was tenacious and determined when he wanted something. One of his best qualities was that he rarely seemed to demand attention to himself, rather he wanted to know about you and what you were interested in. He had a gentle, fun soul and you wanted to be around him. He will be dearly missed.
Chris
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KB lander
Trad climber
Lander
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Aug 15, 2007 - 11:30pm PT
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OK, I haven't had the heart to read any of the current entires, I don't think I have the strength or tears yet to go there.
So, I'm going to talk about hunting on a climbing web site. I actually hunted before Pete. We were both working at the RMB and a friend, Larry Berger, offered to take me deer hunting when our local area offered doe tags. Well, I killed a doe and feeling like the great white woman hunter and things were good. I think Pete caught wind of my accomplishment, and more importantly of what was in my freezer. So of course the next year at the beginning of hunting season Pete has already researched all of the tags possible , gotten a gun a figured out the balistics of rifles.
OK, moving on......at some point in the fall, Pete, Gary C. and myself go antelope hunting. Totally clueless, armed with rifles and Pete at the wheel. A herd of antelop, we park hike around the hill, crawl to the top on our bellies, lie low, aim and Pete fires, he misses, I shoot, I actually shoot the rock which ricachades and hits Gary in the shoulder. We go home at the end of the day without killing but with spending a memorable day together.
so, the story goes on that Pete excels at hunting and kills on an average 3-6 animals a year. I have yet to kill an elk, although Pete has never done anything but encourage me to keep trying and offering to help me out. Pride got in the way and lately I never took him up on help.
so, to finish the story. Last fall I had a reduced price permit in the same area as Pete. I thought I'd figured it out and knew where the elk were at. I arrived on a beautiful fall afternoon ready to kill my elk. Hiking down the hill to Beaver Creek I saw a vehicle down the hill. I took a second look and realized I knew the vehicle. It was Petes green truck that none of us will ever forget. As I approached I realized he had killed a cow elk and was finishing the butchering and loading in the green truck. He told me how he had hiked and slept in and elk bedding area and then waken and followed them for several hour before he got a shot. A shot he took and made and therefore was taking home meat to his beautiful wife, Molly, and his new found love Avery, his daughter. Gary and I joked when Molly had Avery and Pete started being successful at hunting, that it was a male instinct to provide for family. I think for Pete it was that, it was the opportunity for a new challenge, and it was what Pete does....embraces everything in life with enthusiasm, excitement, optimism, and childish love.
Pete, you know how much I love you. Molly, I hope you know how much I love you. Avery, you have no idea how much our entire community loves you.
Sorry for the long words for those of you who made it this far. May the memories and love of Pete keep us all strong in this time of ultimate sadness and questioning why this stuff happens - Peace, Kathy
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George B
climber
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Aug 15, 2007 - 11:48pm PT
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Dear Family and Friends of Pete Absolon,
I have been thinking about Pete for the last three days.
I did not spend a lot of time with him, but whenever I was in Lander we got a chance to catch up, laugh, and enjoy each other’s company.
From the moment I met Pete he always made me feel at ease. He was the “in-town” supervisor for my first course as an instructor. I remember being nervous at the de-brief and Pete made me feel proud of my accomplishments and contributions. I feel lucky to have had the opportunity to work with him and to experience his positive energy.
I know that I am one of many people “out there” who had the good future to be in Pete’s presence at some point and to experience his enthusiasm and spirit for life.
I wish that all of you find peace and strength at this time in your lives.
George Brockman
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LRob
climber
Boulder
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Aug 16, 2007 - 12:26am PT
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I did not know Pete well, but he nevertheless had an impact on my life. Molly, I grew up in Charleston, WV, and my father and yours were acquaintances. When I wanted to enroll in a NOLS semester in 1998, your father suggested that my very nervous father contact Pete. Pete quelled my father's worries and was correct in suggesting that NOLS might be a pivotal experience for me. Post NOLS, I bounced between Lander and the New River Gorge for a few seasons. My NRG friends Gene and Maura Kistler would say often, "Did you meet Pete and Molly in Lander? They are amazing. You should look them up." A few summers ago, I finally had the good fortune to climb next to your sweet family at Wild Iris. I still remember Pete's infectious enthusiasm that day. He encouraged me to lead a route that intimidated me and seemed genuinely proud when I clipped the anchors. I also recall how dear he was with Avery. I left my shoes at the crag that afternoon; you kindly rescued them. When I stopped by your house to retrieve them, you were hosting a party. Pete invited me to stay and have a beer. I was in a hurry and declined, but I appreciated his easy hospitality and his welcoming spirit. The world has lost a great person. My heart aches for your family.
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cts
Trad climber
sw PA
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Aug 16, 2007 - 01:27am PT
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This is unbelievable, another great person and climber passes this year! Pete was just a super person to know, I can not remember him ever putting down anyone, or playing any games on people, just a very special person. His climbing ability was phenominal and his energy was unmatched by any one else I knew at Seneca. It is such an awful shame that some one dies from a rock thrown off of a cliff. The community has lost someone who would make a lot of peoples list of top ten climbers they ever shared a rope with. He would make mine. Molly I pray you are able to have peace as you grieve in these coming days. Your friend, Calvin.
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Denise Ackert
climber
CO
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Aug 16, 2007 - 02:16am PT
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Oh Molly and Avery, I am so sorry – my heart aches for you both and everyone connected to Pete and this tragedy. I too searched for words over the last few days – only to come up with tears.
When I heard of Pete’s death, I pulled out this great photo of you, Pete and Avery taken immediately after Avery was born. The delight and wonder in both of your eyes is so amazing. You both are simply alight, beaming despite your exhaustion.
I remember Pete during your whole labor, being completely engaged in whatever you were going through in the moment – he would look over and say – "she is amazing, she is so strong!" He loved you and Avery with every cell of his being and will continue to. His spirit lives on as is clear from every posting in this forum.
Avery, your daddy was sooo excited when you came into the world. Big tears of joy streamed down his face at the sight of you! Your dad is gonna miss you so, so much, but he’ll be watching over you and keeping you and your Mom safe.
We are all holding you in a circle of love for you to lean into.
Love and Big Hugs,
Denise Ackert
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Rochelle
Mountain climber
Palmer, AK
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Aug 16, 2007 - 02:33am PT
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Dear Molly and Avery,
We just read through every posting and are overwhelmed by the combination of sadness and joy expressed here. A common theme seems to be to seize the moment to appreciate the people around you.
After a long day of climbing at Seneca rocks in the mid-80’s, buddies from my NOLS semester and I sat the base of the Gendarme and made a decision to rap down and drink beer rather than doing one last pitch—up the Gendarme—at dusk. The pinnacle fell a few months later and we were sad we hadn’t seized the moment.
The thing Shannon and I immediately discussed upon hearing the news was a deep sadness for you, Molly and Avery. Seeing so many names of past, present, and future friends made us resolve to spend a bit more time on relationships.
All four of us started at NOLS in the same era, with many intertwining adventures along the way. We enjoyed working with Pete—at NOLS Rocky Mountain and in staffing. We always appreciated seeing him running the Tomato Loop in the OTHER direction, knowing it meant we wouldn’t have to get passed by him. We enjoyed sharing hunting stories—successful and otherwise.
A particularly memorable moment was Pete listening carefully and sharing comforting words after a particularly difficult stretch of courses and family tragedies a number of years ago. It was always clear he cared and how dedicated he was to family.
On Sunday, those of us in Alaska will be thinking of all of you, especially Molly and Avery.
Love,
Shannon and Rick
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molly hampton
climber
lander, wy
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Aug 16, 2007 - 08:59am PT
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Dear Molly and Avery,
I fondly remember Pete's remarks last month at The Nature Conservancy barbecue at Molly and Pete's land...they have been leaders in this area, helping to preserve the Lander front. Pete was so much himself: heartwarming, thoughtful and modest. I have been inspired this last six months by Molly and Pete's passion for conservation and their enthusiasm to encourage others to join. It was that same commitment and positive outlook on life that I found every day when working with Pete at NOLS. He was a joy to be around, always thinking about better solutions, always caring about the whole NOLS community.
My heart goes out to you, Molly and Avery..while I dearly miss a friend and colleague, I know you miss your life partner and dad, sorrow that I can only imagine. Please take the support you need from us, your community.
My love,
Molly (and Bruce, Sara and Kaili)
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a climber's mom
climber
Middletown, CT
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Aug 16, 2007 - 09:22am PT
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I did not have the good fortune of knowing Pete, but, as the mother of a climber, my heart goes out to Molly and Avery. I am heartened and touched by the outpouring of love and support from the climbing community to Pete’s family. Tears come easily while reading the entries on supertopo.com. Climbers, Molly and Avery need you now, and they will need you for years to come.
I am wondering if any thought has gone toward setting up a fund in memory of Pete, perhaps for Avery’s education. I have not seen any mention of this on the NOLS blog or on supertopo.com. Perhaps I missed it. Even a small fund, allowed to compound and reinvest over the next ten years, might prove helpful to Avery in her college years. This clearly non-climbing “accident,” which happened while climbing, strikes - perhaps irrationally - at the core of the fear parents of climbers feel. We love you, we support you and revel in the joy you experience in your life’s work, yet we worry about you. In honor of our climber, in memory of Pete, for the benefit of Avery, we would contribute to such a fund. And, climbers, I think you might find that some of your families would too.
-a climber’s mom
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sjb
climber
Lander, WY
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Aug 16, 2007 - 10:03am PT
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I can still remember meeting Pete at Sinks Canyon, he was one of the first local climbers to welcome me into the community when I moved to Lander many years ago, very open and unpretentious. Since then, Pete has always been one of the regulars at the local crags. We shared many belays while working routes together and I always appreciated his enthusiasm and determination. More often than not, Pete would be there with Molly, and in more recent years, with their girl Avery. I saw them together a lot and it was obvious how much Pete cared for Molly and Avery.
I knew the trail to the Killer Cave was probably snake-free and safe if I saw Pete’s car was already at the trailhead.
Pete was also very active in the Wind Rivers, completing many first ascents and repeats of the classics. I think he wins the title hands down for most ascents of Black Elk. I have great memories of two trips into the Winds with Pete. On one, we climbed a new route in Moss Lake Cirque around 1999. I was impressed by how focused he became, as the route became more difficult and uncertain and the protection ran thin, he showed capabilities and confidence I had never before seen while climbing with him at Sinks. He really seemed to be in his element.
The last time I saw Pete was at the Gannett Grill, just about two weeks ago now. He had recently returned from a hiking trip with Molly into Leg Lake Cirque and was excited about the climbing potential there. We talked about some potential new routes and his enthusiasm and energy gripped me. He had a big smile on his face and seemed to be very happy. That is how I will remember Pete.
Steve Babits
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kdriese
Social climber
Laramie, WY
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Aug 16, 2007 - 10:31am PT
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Molly and Avery,
I just wanted to let you two know that Ellen, Bei and I have been thinking about you every day here in Laramie. Thank goodness for the great Lander community who I'm sure are surrounding you with all the help that they possibly can give. Maybe there is no better place in the world to have to go through something like this than Lander.
Love, Ken Driese, Ellen and Bei
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Molly Absolon
climber
Lander, Wyoming
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Aug 16, 2007 - 10:52am PT
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Again, thank you all for your thoughts, prayers and stories.
I woke up this morning feeling so hollow and sad. Avery is doing well. She is surrounded by a pack of friends who are taking care of her. She asks if it is okay for her to have Pete in her heart but not to be sad all the time. She's stronger than me. But I feel so sad to think of her growing up without her wonderful, amazing daddy. Pete would do things like take her out on the trail-a-bike on single track trails and teach her how to fall- she was three or four at the time. I remember being furious and saying we should stick to roads where falling wasn't an issue...But Avery didn't seem to mind. She learned to fall...
And I remember this father-daughter dance Pete and Avery did this spring at her dance recital. Pete, in his classic way got the music and then came home and practiced over and over. "My Girl" and "Ain't no Mountain High Enough" were etched into my mind as every evening after dinner he'd put them on and start dancing. Avery finally told Pete that she knew the dance and they didn't need to practice anymore. But it was so Pete... if he was going to get up in front of 700 people wearing a tuxedo with a candy-pink cumberbund and tie, he was damn well going to know the steps.
Pete, Pete, I miss you so. I don't know what I'm going to do without you. I had so many adventures and epics with him. He never got mad at me when I screamed and cussed at him while I struggled to follow him up a climb, though I do remember being frozen with fear on the traverse on the Normal Route of the Diamond-it was snowing and slippery and I was scared out of my mind-finally Pete yelled at me to just let go and swing across. Right. I guess I finally did something because we did get up the climb and then had a long night getting down, running out of batteries in our flashlight, fumbing in the dark to find the boulder we were camped under. Did I mention that it was actually fun? I loved spending time out in the mountains, the canyons, the ocean, anywhere...
There were lots of those adventures (epics)...and Pete was always the strong one, the unflappable one, the one who took all the weight, the one who believed in me, the one who didn't seem to love me less if I cried or yelled at him, the one who brought me coffee in bed, who fixed my bike, who broke trail, who packed the gear, and...well everything. Now I look ahead and it just feels so empty to think he's gone...
Just yesterday my sister and I tried to go on a bike ride and couldn't figure out how to work Pete's biking shoes and clipless petals. We rode (Ann one foot out of the clip and terrified of tipping over) first to one friend's and then to another to find someone who could at least release her from the bike. Thank you Jim for helping us get the shoe off and figure out how to unclip. It was kind of funny, but also made me realize just how much I need all of you all now.
Thank you all for posting. I cannot believe the voices from the past that are showing up here. Shannon Westerman! It's probably been 30 plus years since we've had any contact. Ross you are too kind in your memory of me greeting you after your late night epic in the Winds-or maybe I saved my anger(read fear and relief) for Pete until later! Jason, Sharon and John, Pete was kind of like Tom Sawyer wasn't he? Before we knew it we were whitewashing the fence for him and loving it. These stories are helping me immensely. I can laugh and cry. It's when I can't cry that the despair feels so deep.
All of you, thanks so much. I know Pete would be incredibly moved and probably embarrassed to read these posts...but he would also be thrilled to discover what his life meant to so many of us.
molly
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Darell Hensley
Trad climber
Davis , WV
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Aug 16, 2007 - 11:26am PT
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Dear Molly your family & friends
Your loss saddens me deeply. Though I have not climbed for many years Pete was one of the first I encountered back in Carderock, Md. Pete was always inspirational and pleasure to climb with and learn from. One day after work while bouldering at Carderock when I was still somewhat of an apprentice learning the craft. I was exploring some of the remote crags until it was well after dark. As I had had been making my way back to the parking lot and I ran into Pete on the trail. He told me our cars were the last two in the lot and he decided to come look for me to make sure I was all right. That gesture has stuck with me to this day and I have often performed the same gesture myself. Molly I still see both of your wonderful smiles and laughter on the porch of the Gendarme. I am grateful to have had Pete touch my life and so many others the way he did.
My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family
Darell
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Ben J
climber
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Aug 16, 2007 - 11:32am PT
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I am married to Molly’s cousin Peggy.
For the last two summers we went car camping with Pete, Molly, and Avery before going on to our own annual family vacation in Wyoming. We went to Yellowstone last year and to the Black Hills this year. Our children are Hugh (5) and Callie (8), so with Avery in between Callie and Hugh it was nice for all of us; our children got along really well in their triangular relationship. And though Peggy and Molly knew each other well from childhood, Pete and I didn’t know each other, or each other’s spouses, very well. I really valued getting to know Pete outside of the distraction and noise that sometimes goes along with large family events—the place to properly get to know Pete was outdoors.
I really like the way Pete related to my son, Hugh. Hugh adored Pete instantly, and since everything is a weapon for Huey, from sticks to spaghetti, Pete’s crossbow and rifle experience added a lot to Pete’s credibility. Together, Pete and I could talk with Hugh about some of Hugh’s ridiculous gunplay, by talking about the real thing through Pete’s elk and deer hunting stories (experience that I simply do not have). The truth is that I was hoping someday Pete would be able to take Hugh hunting—Pete clearly brought a spiritual consciousness to this new activity of his. I looked to Pete to help us better understand male aggression and violence, and I think we learned a lot from Pete. Pete chose to relate to Huey as a sort of Winnie-the-Pooh/Christopher Robin equal, and he also curbed Huey’s unreasonable enthusiasms with a gentle but firm hand. I learned so much about fathering a very energetic young boy just being around Pete during those two brief car camping trips these last two years. Pete wasn’t trying to teach me, but he did a damn good job. My heart really aches for what Hugh has lost in losing Pete. We live at a time when victory and killing seem to be manhood’s only acknowledged prizes. Pete effortlessly demonstrated that it just isn’t so; Pete had another rarer, gentler way to the treasure.
On our last trip we all took a hike together. It could have degenerated into a festival of complaints and anger, from my children in particular, but it didn’t. Pete helped turn the walk to Harney Peak into an imaginative noble quest to vanquish the dragon, so there was no room for misery. If Pete tired of Huey’s persistent demand for attention, he didn’t really show it. For my part, I secretly, and not so secretly, enjoyed Pete’s pleasure in my son. I think Huey and I both are going to really miss Pete for a long time to come.
I think of Avery and of other girls I know who lost their fathers early in life. Here is a beautiful reflection from Caroline Langston, that was aired on NPR the day before yesterday (August 14). I offer it here with the thought that it might be of value or inspiration for someone else, as it was for me.
http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=12785569
We’ll try our best, Pete.
In peace,
Ben J
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lindsaynohl
climber
Lander, WY
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Aug 16, 2007 - 12:21pm PT
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Dear Molly and Avery,
I got out of the Wind Rivers off of a course just last Wednesday. One of the first handful of people I saw was Pete. I remember him walking up to me and giving me a big hug and asking me how the course went. I was instantly reminded of what a caring person he was and how exited I was for him in his new job at NOLS RM. Then later that day I was sitting in his new office for the first time chatting with him, Evan Horn and Gary about rockfall in the Winds, a conversation that seems just downright eerie to me now. These memories of the last few times I talked to Pete are etched in my mind, as is his warm and mischevous smile. It is so inspriational to read all of these posts, to hear more about the kind of man that Pete was and how much that he loved you and Avery. I wish I had gotten to know him better. I do know that I will take the memory of him and how he lived his life and use it to inspire me to live mine to the fullest. My thoughts and prayers are with you, Avery, your families and Steve. I am truly, truly sorry for your loss.
Lindsay Nohl
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Crag
Trad climber
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Aug 16, 2007 - 01:41pm PT
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Dear Molly & Avery,
I'm a nobody climber who while attending D&E College discovered Seneca Rocks. My memory of Peter is faint other than when he would approach me while up on the rocks. No telling where it would be North Peak, West Face, East Face, Broadway or Luncheon ledges He would talk to me just to see how I and my partner were doing. Offer up a bit of advice; show us a better way of rigging anchors or the like, we we’re just starting to tackle some of the multi-pitch routes at the time. Perhaps out scant rack and wayward look made us appear a bit noobish. He was always smiling and very helpful especially when he saw me going for my first 5.10…wearing my new Fire rock shoes. He is one I looked up to along with the others that made up the original Gendarme crew. I’m very sorry for your lose and my prayers and thoughts are with you and Avery.
Sincerely,
Scott
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Scott Richards
Trad climber
Louisville, CO
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Aug 16, 2007 - 02:04pm PT
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Pete and I did our(NOLS)Instructor Course together in 1989 and then when he was a proctor of a semester course I had the pleasure of instructing with him for their rock climbing section. My overriding memory of Pete from both courses is of his laugh, his grace, his prowess on the rock and his passion for life. He was truly, a to the core, wonderful person. I count myself as fortunate to have spent time with Pete laughing, climbing and being outside. I have great memories of my time with Pete. My thoughts and my prayers go out to you, Molly and Avery.
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