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neebee
Social climber
calif/texas
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Jan 11, 2019 - 09:54pm PT
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hey there, say, oh yes, dear aaron... i sure well, yes, i sure will...
in wanting to him, of course, i did what he had asked...
so, rest assured, here i go to delete, upon your
important request... :)
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neebee
Social climber
calif/texas
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Jan 11, 2019 - 10:04pm PT
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hey there say, dear aaron... oh my... of course not-- you have not offended me... we do what we do for friends...
and, of course, i only went by his request-- and thus,
going by yours now...
>:D<
i am not one to take 'offences' at things...
i know that there are reasons, when folks ask and make
requests...
rest assured, too, that all is well...
:)
and, as to your quote below:
oh my no-- your are not being 'too over-bearin' at all
you KNOW best, as you are 'first hand' on the
front line... of the battle field...
I apologize for being a hard ass right now - but the last 3 days took a huge toll on me - I am in a major decompression stage and Brandon will not be thinking clearly for 1-2 weeks as his brain adjusts to being alcohol free.
I will post more later, but please edit that post and get that address off there.
i will also private message and share my
respect for you, there, too...
thank you so much, for being very kind, in your
ways to share all this...
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thebravecowboy
climber
The Good Places
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Jan 11, 2019 - 10:04pm PT
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just caught this thing, definitely rooting for you Brandon- !
as usual, the weege put it right:
love,
many.
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ß Î Ø T Ç H
Boulder climber
ne'er–do–well
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Jan 11, 2019 - 11:46pm PT
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best of luck to Brandon
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Happiegrrrl2
Trad climber
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Jan 12, 2019 - 05:25am PT
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Now, THIS takes me back to memories of beginner sobriety drama...hahaha.
I will definitely contribute to the fund, but can not until next week as one needs funds to give funds.
Aaron, in NYC AA they strongly emphasized that one should not do 12 Step work alone. Glad you do have a sponsor on board but yeah, I can imagine the boot marks on yer butt.
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Gnome Ofthe Diabase
climber
Out Of Bed
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Jan 12, 2019 - 05:51am PT
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Addicts/Brandon
dig deep, Find the strength
be strong-You are important
Find Serenity, know you are loved'
be all in, know too that We Care
CLIMBER; You got this
Got Gear in; You are On-Belay.
The Leader Must Not Fall
 we are all praying for you
Brave Cowboy Why did you feel the need to out a BruthA?
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Happiegrrrl2
Trad climber
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Jan 12, 2019 - 08:31am PT
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I wasn't trying to chastise you; sorry if you felt that way.
The story just reminded me of one particular 12th Step I participated in. Will tell here, not for your reading solely but for all of us.
But....I'm on my cell phone and more than shorty posts are problematic so...will add the story when on my laptop.
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Happiegrrrl2
Trad climber
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Jan 12, 2019 - 12:40pm PT
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Okay - On the laptop.
So, I was probably somewhere in my first year of sobriety, maybe up to two years sober, when this young woman shares she is new to AA during that portion of the meeting.
She gives enough information to know that she is going cold turkey and *concerned* because she can't seem to stop shaking. As I was sitting nearby, I looked over and got a jolt of reality. My thought was "She is in physical withdrawal and in trouble." Pretty much anyone who was aware probably thought the same, and as soon as the meeting ended, I was one of a dozen women making a beeline to her.
She was playing it down. "I'm okay; I was overreacting."
Someone laid it out clearly: "Your body is detoxing, and you could die." Though it was said in a bit less blunt wording. "Would you like to go to the hospital? We can help you to get there." Several of us, me being one, shook our heads in agreement. "You've taken the first step. Let us help you with this."
She starts saying why she can't go to the hospital. It's becoming clear she is getting freaked out and ready to bolt. So someone suggests "Maybe your just hungry. We're going to the diner. Want to come along?"
That took a little more cajoling. She had the idea something was up. But someone made some comment about loneliness in new sobriety or something and that got her walking with us. She said she wanted to get something from her apartment and....we all went with her. She was in B.A.D shape. In her apartment we went into serious 12th Step action. Being friendly and compassionate, but telling her the truth - that if she went into convulsions, we might net BE able to get her to the hospital in time.
She still had every reason/excuse she couldn't go to the hospital. Work family obligations, no insurance.... on and on.
It was at this point where I had a visceral feeling - that THIS was a very good example as to why we don't 12th Step alone. The AA slogan is "They'll get you drunk a lot faster than you can get them sober." But what I felt in that moment was so much more frightening.
I felt like the disease in her alcoholism was like a cornered and injured wild animal. It had been warning us away, and we weren't getting it. I really could almost say I "saw" a vicious lion getting ready to rip at me with its claws. It was terrifying.
Because we had several women, 5 I think, we were able to take turns talking this woman through her process. It really looked, at times, like this was going to be one we would have to walk away from. She WAS starting to get verbally combative.
I don't know what it was that got us through, but there came a point where she just gave up and agreed to go to the hospital. She was visibly shaking all over her body, uncontrollably.
Action - someone grabbed a tote bag and some of the clothes laying around her floor. "They'll have toiletries at the hospital, or we can bring you what you need(We had already given her our phone numbers after the meeting)." We knew we had to get her out that door and in a taxi before the window of time we had was closed.
As we left the lobby, she said to the doorman "These women are taking me to the hospital. I'm an alcoholic and I need help."
I will never forget the look in his eyes. He probably saw her in dire straits for a long time. The doormen see a lot, and they clean up our puke, get rid of the "guest" who is taking us home with the intent of - well, you can imagine, get us into the right apartment, calm us from our hysterics that are waking up other residents - and who knows what else. They need their jobs, and are unlikely to tell us in a sober moment what we did last night. Especially if they've already lost a job because they cared enough to try and the alcoholic got their revenge. Yet we often view them almost like an inanimate object.
He quietly said "God bless you. Thank you." And "Don't you worry (her name). I'll take care of anything you need here. You just call me if you need me."
Out the door he went and hailed a taxi with the best of NYC doorman authority.
We all piled in, the detoxing woman in back sandwiched between, just in case she decided to bolt at a stop sign. Or slowdown. Or at speed....
That taxi driver knew, I'm sure, and he made quick work of it and got us there and refused the fare. "Good luck" he said, while we were getting out. One of use pressed a twenty into his hands, and said "Thank you!"
The hospital staff saw what was coming, and I'm sure it was not hard for them to figure it out. No doubt they see the scenario play out with some frequency.
The staff was so kind to this woman, and I don't remember much except that the doctor did not shoo us off while he began examining her. I don't know that would be the case these days(this was about 1996-98). He asked the questions, gave his opinion, and offered her treatment option and made it seem like she was getting a day at the spa. She agreed to the help.
At that point, he let us know they would take it from there, and we left.
I don't know what happened to that woman afterward. For all I know, she became one of our regulars. I'm just that bad with remembering faces, and in early sobriety - the first several years - I kind of lived inside a shell within myself.
But I will never forget that awareness that we were dealing with a terrible wildness, this alcoholism, when its host was fighting back, and only one of them - alcoholic or alcoholism - was going to live in the end.
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Mike Honcho
Trad climber
Glenwood Springs, CO
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Jan 12, 2019 - 12:52pm PT
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Aaron, in NYC AA they strongly emphasized that one should not do 12 Step work alone.
Here on the Western Slope, CO, my homegroup that I chair is totally split on 12the step alone or with at least one other person. We actually had a topic and ended up going over an hour on that point alone!
Hank
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Happiegrrrl2
Trad climber
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Jan 13, 2019 - 12:49am PT
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That's sure a story, but as the Big Book says - cunning, baffling, powerful. I got a chuckle out your guys saying it was a wired looking liquor store just before realizing...
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neebee
Social climber
calif/texas
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Jan 13, 2019 - 05:55am PT
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hey there, say, aaron...
as to this quote:
Anyways. Didn't hear from Brandon today, I am heading to the AA alumni meeting right after work as Sunday's are visiting hours until 5pm and have another friend there currently and will catch last hour of visiting time after I work tomorrow. I'll report back and was invited by the staff to stay for dinner with them and visit as the meeting starts at 7pm and I should be there by 4pm or so.
Personally, I'll never do a 12 step solo again, I think it's always best to have backup, even in Brandon's case I should of reached out more and knew a meeting I could of grabbed someone at looking back at it now, but that night was just chaos and I was just trying to do the next right thing. Hindsight is 20/20.
Thanks everyone for letting me share, and thanks for those that have contributed. The balls in Brandons court - it'll be awesome to go back each week and see him and the changes that occur :)
say, thanks for the updates... :)
will try to call you, sunday eve...
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Happiegrrrl2
Trad climber
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Jan 15, 2019 - 05:23am PT
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I'll be donating this afternoon when I get on the laptop. Vel phone too difficult for me to manage.
I'll also make a separate ST thread for the GFM page as I'm sure there are Supdrtopina who want to support Brandon but may not read this thread to know about it. If some other Stian wants to do that before I can, please do. That's not for Aaron to do as it must be a known ST user for validity sake.
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Off White
climber
Tenino, WA
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Jan 15, 2019 - 09:29am PT
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Ah, good luck Aaron, it's a tough road. I made three different heroic efforts getting BVB into rehab, and none of them were his last go round. Its tough with an addict, the wind only blows one direction, and its all suck and no blow. I suspect your sponsor is giving you the hard advice that comes from experience. We all want the ones we love to come around, become those people we remember and hold dear in our hearts, but ultimately its not up to you and me. You obviously care greatly about Aaron, but don't neglect the self care too.
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neebee
Social climber
calif/texas
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Jan 15, 2019 - 07:14pm PT
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hey there say, aaron... am trying to help a bit, donate, but
can't until the end of the month...
got a card and letter ready... too...
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Gilroy
Social climber
Bolderado
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Jan 16, 2019 - 11:29am PT
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I follow this thread because it doesn't get more real than this on the Supertopo. I am not the sober type but really am inspired by the grit and honesty shown here.
A little background music for the discussion...
https://www.gq.com/story/clean-musicians
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Zoltani
Trad climber
LV, NV
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Jan 16, 2019 - 12:37pm PT
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I have followed this thread for the raw emotion and vulnerability found within. While I could recognize myself in some of the posts, I still convinced myself that I didn't have a problem. I am still not sure I am an alcoholic, but I decided to take a break and it has been about 10 days since my last drink. That's probably the longest I have gone without one in a very long time. Once I decided to take a break I didn't have any problems, no withdrawal symptoms or anything. This feels good and I think I will stick with it for awhile. Told myself I'd quit for 30 days for health benefits and to prove to myself I can do it, but at this moment I am thinking I might try to keep it up.
I haven't been active on ST in a long time, used to have a different username that I lost. I created this one to let everyone in this thread know how much you have inspired me and I wish you all the best in your journey. I donated to Brandon and hope it works out for him.
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Happiegrrrl2
Trad climber
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Jan 16, 2019 - 04:30pm PT
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Update: Just checked the GoFundMe pages and it is halfway to the goal. This is due in part to someone who has been quite generous, although everything is relative. That generosity may have been less a sacrifice for that person than someone else who donated $20. Nonetheless, HalfTime Celebration!
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Happiegrrrl2
Trad climber
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Jan 17, 2019 - 06:32am PT
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Had a Drunk Dream last night and like any good nightmare, once you're awake and safe, it was a good one.
It had it all: the popular boy from grade school mesmerizing me with his cool(but he was leading an AA meeting and drunk, not to the point it was obvious but that *fun part* where you're just sparkling...)
An old boyfriend acting out in the meeting with the group hottie, time travel back to an old west mining town(and my dreantine wardrobe consultant spared no expense!), Disneyland and, apparently Disney himself. He was dressed a little like the Monopoly logo guy.
And a cameo appearance by Shame.
I don't have them often but its always a wonderful thing to wake up and realize in have NOT been drinking and lying the who time I've been sober.
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MikeL
Social climber
Southern Arizona
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Jan 17, 2019 - 07:30am PT
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Aaron Tritz: I may be incorrect [CG Jung] was an original founder of AA, but I do believe he contributed to AA in the early beginnings, . . .
I had never heard this before, but there appears to be some truth in the claim, although in a peripheral and advisory role. Bill W. said he had been informed by Jung’s advice to an alcoholic Jung had treated many years previously. It was Bill Wilson’s view that Jung had contributed in a major way to the need for a “religious conversion” in AA methodology. I think that Jung had said he had no direct contact with the founders of AA.
As for dream interpretations, Jung’s the guy to read. If you read his academic writings, you can get a gist of what he’s referring to analytically. If you read his more poetic writings on the subject of the influence of the unconsciousness (individual and collective), you’ll need more than a scientific view of the world and being.
Thanks for the insight. I have ex-alcoholics in my extended family of in-laws. They are almost militant, but with a lot of humor (if that makes any sense).
Be well, and good luck.
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Happiegrrrl2
Trad climber
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Jan 17, 2019 - 04:14pm PT
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How long have you been sober? I got sober August 26th of 1996, so 22 years and change since my last drink.
I didn't have any drunk dreams for several months. Can't remember when the first one came - probably at some point in my first year. I've had one or two a year, I'd say. They often have me having been saying I was sober the whole time and coming to a realization that was in fact not true and I had been drinking all along(on occasion).
It's always a relief, waking up and knowing it was just a dream.
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