Discussion Topic |
|
This thread has been locked |
Happiegrrrl2
Trad climber
|
|
|
Topic Author's Original Post - Jan 15, 2019 - 11:47am PT
|
Hey There, Supertopians - Just wanted to update those who may not have been following Brandon's last several posts that his course has changed. Since he has posted openly in this thread:
http://www.supertopo.com/climbing/thread.php?topic_id=1087464&msg=3160896#msg3160896
I hope it's not going to be a problem for me to write that he has realized he needs to quit drinking, and after going to doc and beginning a medical detox, he's gone into rehab. I don't see a reason to post anything more specific to that - what I know is what he and a friend have been posting to the above thread.
However, I did want to mention that his financial situation was not good, and he and this friend have set up a GoFundMe to help cover the costs associated with that situation.
That GoFundMe Page is at:
https://www.gofundme.com/help-brandon-mayo-with-his-recovery?utm_source=internal&utm_medium=email&utm_content=campaign_title&utm_campaign=donation_receiptv5&fbclid=IwAR2DOnKTzVVIdEi2wM-8qR7LIaFQ6Edc_Nbhp8tl-rsU0hYqVrBAz7HigiE
If I get word from the person in contact with Brandon that he desires I delete this, of course I will. But hopefully people will look past any issue they have with this thread and be okay with it or at least not be upset and disparaging over it.
I know that people are not always in a position to help; that they may have many obligations to meet, and we do need to do that first. But for those who feel they'd like to help, any amount is going to be appreciated. Every $5 is $5 closer(well....GoFundMe takes a small % for administration costs, of course, so probably $4 and something closer is more accurate) to getting this stressful situation to be less stressful.
Thanks.
|
|
johntp
Trad climber
Little Rock and Loving It
|
|
|
Jan 15, 2019 - 05:40pm PT
|
Best of luck to Brandon. Offered him a free car back in 2014. He wasn't interested in making the trip to SoCal. overwatch drove out from PHX and picked it up. 2002 low mileage Toy Highlander, well maintained.
Brandon is a good guy. I offered him a great deal and he turned it down.
|
|
Happiegrrrl2
Trad climber
|
|
|
Topic Author's Reply - Jan 15, 2019 - 06:05pm PT
|
Pendejo, there might be a Contact button on the GoFundMe page to cobra t Brandon's friend who is administering that. Or, if you click the ST link I mentioned, you could post a request he contact you(the friend). He may have provided his email in that thread too. I'm not sure.
|
|
neebee
Social climber
calif/texas
|
|
|
Jan 15, 2019 - 07:26pm PT
|
hey there say, happygrrrl... say, me too, i just try to do little
bits, whenever and wherever i can...
i have to plan and work things very very carefully, but,
am planning to try...
winter, and taxes, etc, made this an off time, to
help encourage others, that way... :)
as we all know...
have card and letter, ready, too...
and, the 'famous prayers' that so many don't like, :))
but-- have done far and above, by the accounts of so many other folks...
|
|
overwatch
climber
Arizona
|
|
|
Jan 15, 2019 - 07:58pm PT
|
Hey John I've been gone from this site for a quite a while but started lurking a little bit again and I saw your post.
I loved that car but unfortunately about two weeks after I picked it up from you someone ran a red light and T-Boned the hell out of me going about 50 miles an hour.
Luckily she hit me forward of the driver's door and I wasn't hurt and was able to drive away and get back home but it damaged the transmission and the frame and it ended up a total loss.
Strange how things wind up because with the insurance money I was able to buy another car and have about $5,000 left over which totally saved my ass in the situation I was in.
Still one of the kindest things that anyone's ever done for me
All the best of luck to Brandon
vvvvvvvvvvv
Yeah, I'll kick something in especially now that my financial advisor, not so silentone said it was ok
|
|
silentone
Mountain climber
wisconsin
|
|
|
Jan 16, 2019 - 12:17am PT
|
Overwatch maybe you could play some of that forward to Brandon............Just a suggestion.....Brandon's friend really stuck his neck out here.......anything helps........Peace out
S.O.
p.s. thanks for starting this thread happie
|
|
Splater
climber
Grey Matter
|
|
|
Jan 16, 2019 - 12:32am PT
|
In November 2017, GoFundMe announced that it will no longer charge a 5% fee per donation for US, Canada, and UK individual campaigns, and instead rely upon tips left by donors to support the website.
The fee is now just 2.9% to cover credit card processing,
plus you can make an optional tip to help run the website.
So I felt my donation would help.
|
|
John M
climber
|
|
|
Jan 16, 2019 - 07:48am PT
|
Thanks for starting this thread Terri. I don't do Facebook that much and so didn't see the link to the GoFundme that Aaron put up. Thanks go to you too Aaron for big time support for a friend. I am very grateful that Brando is doing this and I am glad to know that you are also on the road to recovery. Best wishes to you Aaron.
Come on people. Lets do this. My donation is made. How about the rest of you? Brandon is a member of the tribe. He is in a hole and needs a hand to pull himself out. I know that some of you are leery of putting funds towards something like this because it doesn't always work the first go around, or as we heard about BVB, sometimes even the 3rd time isn't enough. The thing is that every time a person makes this decision to quit increases the odds that they will make it out. Brandon is a decent straight up guy with a good heart. He deserves a shot at a better life. Yes he has made some poor decisions that have put him in this hole, but he is capable of changing and I am hoping that you will support him in his efforts.
JohnTp..I am hoping that you will realize that it was the alcohol that was likely the reason that Brandon wasn't able to take you up on your kind offer. Alcoholism is an insidious beast and most people need help overcoming it. So thank you for your kind offer to him and I hope that you will forgive him for not being able to take you up on your generosity.
Best wishes to you on your road to recovery Brandon!
John M
|
|
Happiegrrrl2
Trad climber
|
|
|
Topic Author's Reply - Jan 16, 2019 - 04:25pm PT
|
Update: Just checked the GoFundMe pages and it is halfway to the goal. This is due in part to someone who has been quite generous, although everything is relative. That generosity may have been less a sacrifice for that person than someone else who donated $20. Nonetheless, HalfTime Celebration!
|
|
L
climber
Just livin' the dream
|
|
|
Jan 16, 2019 - 05:14pm PT
|
Wishing you success, Brandon, and the beauty of a clean and sober life.
Thanks for starting the thread, Happi.
|
|
johntp
Trad climber
Little Rock and Loving It
|
|
|
Jan 16, 2019 - 05:29pm PT
|
That’s, uh, an odd way to say you’re not going to fund Brandon there, John. Hope you’re ok.
I'm good. But yeah, that's pretty much it. I offered him a great vehicle (free of charge) when he needed one and he wasn't willing to make the trip to SoCal to pick it up. Even offered to pay his airfare to fly to OC airport. I think he is a good guy, but am done trying to help people that won't help themselves.
Overwatch, sorry to read that. Bummer.
|
|
Hardman Knott
Gym climber
Mill Valley, Ca
|
|
|
Jan 16, 2019 - 05:51pm PT
|
Speaking of people who won't help themselves (and as a cautionary tale), a very well-to-do person in Mill Valley offered and paid $30,000 for a one month stay at a rehab facility for a friend he had gone to high school with. Less than a week after the guy got out, he called another friend asking if he had any Vicodin or other opiates. Needless to say it was an epic fail.
|
|
Happiegrrrl2
Trad climber
|
|
|
Topic Author's Reply - Jan 16, 2019 - 06:19pm PT
|
Hardman, from the perspective of a non-addictive personality, it just seems incomprehensible, but the disease is very complex. Its not simply a matter of deciding to quit, feeling an obligation because someone helped you or whatnot.
Edit: So people should know...just because someone has donated for this, there is NO guarantee. If one cannot give without expectations, may be best to not give at all.
|
|
johntp
Trad climber
Little Rock and Loving It
|
|
|
Jan 16, 2019 - 06:23pm PT
|
JohnTp..I am hoping that you will realize that it was the alcohol that was likely the reason that Brandon wasn't able to take you up on your kind offer. Alcoholism is an insidious beast and most people need help overcoming it. So thank you for your kind offer to him and I hope that you will forgive him for not being able to take you up on your generosity.
No worries there. I'm a recovering alcoholic myself and understand the road ahead of him.
I'll throw a few bones his way.
|
|
jbaker
Trad climber
Redwood City, CA
|
|
|
Jan 16, 2019 - 06:25pm PT
|
I kicked in. I know there are no guarantees this will do the trick for Brandon, but we've all had challenges and I'd rather focus on the chance this could move Brandon to a better place. At worst, I tried to help someone and I'm out a few bucks.
|
|
Hardman Knott
Gym climber
Mill Valley, Ca
|
|
|
Jan 16, 2019 - 06:27pm PT
|
Hardman, from the perspective of a non-addictive personality {snip}
FWIW I have an extremely OCD / addictive personality, and was addicted to about the most addictive substance known to man for decades from age 10 (pack a day at age 12 when they were 50 cents a pack) - until I finally decided I'd had enough and quit forever (I swore by the mantra that flesh is dumb; I am indeed in control of my body) - and never looked back.
Knott everyone can be easily pigeonholed (or at least knott accurately).
|
|
Gnome Ofthe Diabase
climber
Out Of Bed
|
|
|
Jan 16, 2019 - 06:31pm PT
|
My thoughts & prayers go out to all who battle day in and day out
I have that genetic makeup.
but I've been lucky & strong,
many of my friends have not and so succumbed.
You can try to tell your truth
you can show the depths of despair that it has driven the best of the best too. . .
But you cannot write it on another's soul
 the way it is written on you & yours.
Stop trying
You who have no idea...know that....
YOU Have No Idea
|
|
Ghost
climber
A long way from where I started
|
|
|
Jan 16, 2019 - 07:08pm PT
|
It's like a lot of serious problems. There's a necessary first step. Don't make that first step, and nothing else will help. But if you do make the first step...
...well, your journey is just beginning.
And every step in that journey is crucial. Doesn't matter how far you've come along the path, miss one step and you're back in the trash.
Maybe there are people who can walk that path alone, but most of us need help. The gofundme will get you past the first step, but there is a long, long journey ahead, and it won't be easy. But always remember that there is support and help available. Certainly here on ST, and probably elsewhere.
Stay strong Brandon
|
|
Rhodo-Router
Gym climber
sawatch choss
|
|
|
Jan 16, 2019 - 09:00pm PT
|
Never met him. Just kicked down.
Suerte amigo!
|
|
neebee
Social climber
calif/texas
|
|
|
Jan 16, 2019 - 10:29pm PT
|
hey there say, all...
OVERwhelming, it is:
so many folks in the world and so many affected by addictions...
so many results... seen and unseen...
each person is different, though, some may fall into similar patterns...
sometimes, if they do, well-- they may get help from 'fellow same pattern'ers' too... as to what trail was best for them...
hope that you, brandon_ (though you may not see this for a bit) find the
right folks to help you, that KNOW, or are familiar with your pattern... (either from you life, thus far, or, from learning about you, now)...
side note:
the wish-- of course, is to stop immediate and never look back, and be free--
yes, i DO KNOW some of these folks...
they stopped that VERY day...
and stood through body-pain...
(though, sadly, this is NOT THE NORM-- as compared to the vast humans in the world) ...
A--one, man, in specific, an older man now, still married to the
very same gal-- actually stopped, after drinking like a fish, night and day, and sadly became'famous for it'...
he actually stopped, due to finding a love, as to a human being, that
he loved more than his selfish please... it shocked him...
and, it shocked him, that he'd lose it...
B--however, sadly, i have seen MORE than a handful of men, lose their wives, homes, and even relationships with their children, as, they just could not stop... no shock 'shook them up' and, no 'child's tears either' ...
it is a human thing that only each individual can 'find the key' of:
why...
C-- even then... some won't make it... only THEY know why...
yet, here, too:
i also know a handful, that made it, after hard wrestling and anguish as to
families half-ruined-- yet, they HAVE made it, and live in success now...
and, they and the families, though split, are STILL grateful for it...
D-- and, then, those that did not make it...
well, i've lost track of many of them...
BUT, the few more personal to me, well-- they died very awfully ... it was not pretty, :( and-- sadly, some of their family, even witnessed it...
side note:
friends, can help some of those that struggle... but, they have to LEARN how, as to each individual, or, as to each 'specific behavior pattern group' etc...
and, then, there is a few 'wild pitches out there' that many not
fit such patterns... harder to help, but we should not give up on them...
NOW--for brandon ,and all of our friends, that are addicted:
do not give up...
keep searching yourself... get to KNOW yourself...
learn why...
then, learn how...
then, hang on to all that is dear that IS helping...
AND, tackle the trail, with 'these answers' and,
hopefully -- the friends and family along the way,
can join in, to keep the success even stronger...
if not-- the trail is still yours:
but all the harder...
do not lose it, or, let anyone 'take it away from you' by
their attitudes or affects on you...
just please, do NOT give up...
the 'lie' is: no one cares...
the 'truth' is: there ARE folks that DO...
|
|
|
SuperTopo on the Web
|
Let us know!