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Jingy
Social climber
Nowhere
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Jan 29, 2010 - 03:38pm PT
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Why is it that when a farmer Fks a sheep he does so at the edge of a cliff?
wait for it......
so the sheep will puch back!
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Ricardo Cabeza
climber
All Over.
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Jan 29, 2010 - 03:51pm PT
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Have you heard about the latest redneck sex aid?
Velcro gloves
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Ksolem
Trad climber
Monrovia, California
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Jan 29, 2010 - 06:00pm PT
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Why do Scottsmen wear kilts?
Sheep can hear the sound of a zipper from a mile away.
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Gene
Social climber
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Jan 29, 2010 - 06:09pm PT
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Favorite Basque tune?
I Only Have Eyes For Ewes.
Baaaaaaaaaad!
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deuce4
climber
Hobart, Australia
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Jan 29, 2010 - 06:12pm PT
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One summer, Billy Joe and Tucker were working as sheepherders, and were roaming their fields on horses, when they came across a sheep with its head stuck in a barbed wire fence.
Billy Joe jumps down and starts having his way with the helpless sheep. After a while he looks up and says to Tucker, still on his horse, "Hey, Tucker, want a piece of this?"
Tucker says, "Sure", jumps down off his horse then sticks his head in the barbed wire.
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Gene
Social climber
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Jan 29, 2010 - 06:32pm PT
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Cosmic,
What a shocking photo. I am offended. Shocked.
Locker wearing a tie. Pleeeeeze take it down.
g
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Fritz
Trad climber
Hagerman, ID
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Jan 29, 2010 - 06:54pm PT
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Gene Wilder and Daisy!
Daisy was hot!
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Scared Silly
Trad climber
UT
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Jan 29, 2010 - 07:13pm PT
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Not a sheep joke nor a joke:
In Montana it is illegal to have a ewe in the cab of a vehicle without another person present.
Sheep joke:
A grad. student is conducting a survey on sheep sex so he travels to Wyoming and asks a rancher about it. The rancher says:
"Front feet on fence and back feet in the Wellingtons."
The grad student then goes to Colorado and asks the farmer the same question. The farmer says:
"Front feet on fence and back feet in the Wellingtons."
Everywhere the grad student travels he gets the same answer: Front feet on fence and back feet in the Wellingtons.
Finally, he gets Utah and asks the same question to a rancher: The rancher says:
"Front feet on my shoulders and back feet in the Wellingtons."
The grad student says, "Wow that is the first time I have heard that response." To which the rancher asks how everyone does it. The grad student says:
Front feet on fence and back feet in the Wellingtons.
The rancher then exclaims - What no kissing????
Ewwweeee!!!!
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Anastasia
Mountain climber
hanging from a crimp and crying for my mama.
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Jan 29, 2010 - 07:20pm PT
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Dude, your talking about my cousins...
AFS
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Ksolem
Trad climber
Monrovia, California
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Jan 29, 2010 - 07:24pm PT
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The pub is crowded, but one man has a table to himself. He downs a pint, and begins a tirade, yelling in a thick Irish brogue.
“I built the bridge in this town with my bare hands, but do they call me O’Donnell the bridge builder!!??
….. Noooo. “
After another pint:
“I built the church in this town with my bare hands, but will anyone call me O’Donnell the church builder!!??
…… Noooo. “
“But f*ck one sheep!! …”
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slabbo
Trad climber
fort garland, colo
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Jan 29, 2010 - 07:40pm PT
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This me and my Love Ewe at my recent 5-0
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Ksolem
Trad climber
Monrovia, California
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Jan 30, 2010 - 11:10pm PT
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A SCOTSMAN walks into the bedroom with a sheep on a leash and says...
"Honey, this is the cow I make love to when you have a headache."
The wife, lying in the bed reading a book, looks up and says,
"If you weren't such an idiot, you'd know that's a sheep,
Not a cow."
The guy replies, "If you weren't so presumptuous,
You'd realize I was talking to the sheep."
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moacman
Trad climber
Montana
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Jan 30, 2010 - 11:39pm PT
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This takes place in Montucky.
A man walks up to another man who is carrying two sheep under his arms. Are you going to shear those sheep he asks nope I'm going to screw them both myself.
Stevo
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SteveW
Trad climber
The state of confusion
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Jan 31, 2010 - 03:54pm PT
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ewe!!!!!
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apogee
climber
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Jan 31, 2010 - 04:35pm PT
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slabbo
Trad climber
fort garland, colo
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Jan 31, 2010 - 04:40pm PT
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At my farm, the sheep wear the stockings !
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Patrick Sawyer
climber
Originally California now Ireland
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Jan 31, 2010 - 05:58pm PT
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Okay, here is a cheap joke...
What do they call a sheep tied to a post in New Zealand?
A leisure center.
Australia, where men are men and the sheep are afraid.
Of course NZ could be replaced with Wales or Australia with Scotland or...
(Actually to the first one it was a Co Wicklow joke. What do they call a sheep tied to a post in Enniskerry?)
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Haggis
Trad climber
Scotland
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Jan 31, 2010 - 05:59pm PT
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what do you call a sheep duck taped to a lamp-post in wales?
a leisure center.
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Haggis
Trad climber
Scotland
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Jan 31, 2010 - 06:01pm PT
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beet me too it :P
Why do Welsh sheep farmers like to screw sheep on the edge of cliffs?
because they kick back more.
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Patrick Sawyer
climber
Originally California now Ireland
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Jan 31, 2010 - 06:01pm PT
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I beat you to it Haggis.
I mean, I mean, I beat you to the joke.
^^^^^^
Just saw your post Haggis, yeah, I did bleat you to it.
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