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zip
Trad climber
pacific beach, ca
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Topic Author's Original Post - Nov 8, 2009 - 03:00pm PT
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The holiday season is quickly approaching.
Da Zip has got to get busy and find a new women, or it will just be me alone with a turkey pot pie, Netflix, and the ST website.
1. A real man, would not shoplift the pooty from a single mother.
The rest, i am a little fuzzy on.
Can you help a brother out?
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marv
Mountain climber
Bay Area
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Rule 1: Welfare mothers make better lovers.
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GDavis
Social climber
SOL CAL
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1. Make sure the captain is wearing a raincoat. Playing by the odds here.
2. Lights out by 8.
3. Watch out for baby daddies.
End.
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Chaz
Trad climber
greater Boss Angeles area
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The kids gotta be 21. At least.
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Jaybro
Social climber
Wolf City, Wyoming
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I'm guessing you are not a parent...
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neebee
Social climber
calif/texas
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hey there ol' zip, say, honest and truly, i am not meaning to take any of you "fun" away, or a nice holiday meal of turkey...
but say:
finding yourself alone at times like this, can actually be better for you--far more so, than pushing the issue of a girlfriend, too soon and fast...
say, you can learn about yourself... and thus be even better boyr-friend material for the future... and the future--the long haul of life, is a very important thing...
say, this is a chance for you to get strong, and solid in areas that may not have loooked at before, that could use some "touch ups" etc....
just make sure to make this holiday fun, in an at home, and perhaps cook something yourself, and find a way to share it with some one that needs a helping hand in the family, or a buddy perhaps, that is down and out...
well, god bless to you, as you climb this hard holiday---being that i DO know that folks can tend to get depressed when alone, while others have family to share good things with...
i've had my alone times, too... thus, i can say that there IS good that can come out it---much more and better, than pushing others things that are perhaps just not meant to be, at this moment...
:)
*now, i do have nice times with the "step" family, around here, and have come to have two new neighbor families for friends...
god bless to you zip....
let us know how it all goes... :)
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Mighty Hiker
climber
Vancouver, B.C. Small wall climber.
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Legally, if you provide support for the children, either directly or through supporting the mother, you may then be considered in loco parentis, and so responsible for continuing to provide that support - even if you don't live with the mother, and aren't married to her. That may be the case even if you agree otherwise with the mother, even in writing. You'd have to check the law wherever you live, and how it applies.
That said, I agree with t*r - single parents, particularly single mothers, are often quite amazing people. It's safe to assume that their priority will always be the children, but people who are responsible and reliable are often good partners, even if they have to balance children, family, and relationship.
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Mighty Hiker
climber
Vancouver, B.C. Small wall climber.
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There's no shortage of stuff in popular culture - books, movies, etc - about blended families, single parents, and such. It sounds like it can be a rewarding challenge.
I suspect that one's contribution/commitment to the children/family would have to be fairly significant and ongoing before you were legally deemed to be required to continue it. But it is something to consider.
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Jingy
Social climber
Flatland, Ca
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Zip......
your old enough to know these things....
try to treat her with some respect...
or are we talking about a rule of thumb, here...?
its against the law to beat her with a stick larger than the thumb
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Blinky
Trad climber
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If you're looking for a woman, you probably won't find the right one... so stop looking, do your normal thing and let it happen. Thanksgiving alone ain't so bad, make it a heavy workout day.
...but if you do hook up with a single Mom, just realize she won't have gobs of time to spend with you cuz she's really got her hands full. Make things easy on her.
And definitely DON'T try to be a father to her kids, we all have ONE father, that's it, there is no substitute. Be a friend to them instead, it's fun and a LOT easier.
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Jingy
Social climber
Flatland, Ca
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LEB - women are not used cars.....
wow!
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Papillon Rendre
climber
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LEB:
It amazes me that you assume single mothers are looking for financial support. There are several women who are capable of supporting themselves and their children without financial assistance.
There are many single mothers who do not even allow interaction between their children and companion until the relationship is serious. In fact, many single mothers are waiting for their children to leave the nest to start engaging in active dating.
Yes, mothers will put their children first. That is something that you would expect and hope to see.
With sexual activity (unless you're in a LTR), a condem is recommended.
After reading your first post, I felt very offended. You portray single mothers in a very shabby light. Your assumption of single mothers could be true of crack heads or povery stricken mothers in the ghetto. Is that the geographical area where Zip is searching?
A SINGLE MOTHER
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Papillon Rendre
climber
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LEB:
Used merchandise? I do not understand what you're saying. I have never judged myself or other humans as merchandise.
Your assumption of single mothers is deplorable and that is why I put in my deux centimes.
I do not need validation. You're very narrow minded and extremely judgmental. Shame on you!
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Crimpergirl
Sport climber
Boulder, Colorado!
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Rules for dating a single mother are exactly the same as the rules for dating anybody.
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Matt
Trad climber
primordial soup
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this is exactly what we need- some judgmental 60-something barren 'shoulda-beena-spinsta' type tellin people about what their relationships or other interpersonal interactions ought to (or ought not to) look like... threads that get corrupted by such loisification make me wanna puke!
why?
seriously lowest, nobody was posting in THIS thread to get YOUR opinion, of THAT i can assure you!
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John Moosie
climber
Beautiful California
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Rules for dating a single mother are exactly the same as the rules for dating anybody.
Mostly, but you should have some idea of whether you want kids or not. I never wanted kids, so figured it was better not to date single moms. If we fell in love and decided to get married, then I would have an instant family.
As for Ray's point about chemistry. It is enough perhaps for the first date or so, but history is indicative of how a person will act in the future. Certainly if they have changed, then there will be signs of it, but I want to know who I am dating, so past relationships are important.
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Crimpergirl
Sport climber
Boulder, Colorado!
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John - agreed. If one does not want children, they shouldn't date people with kids. They should wrap their rascal. They should use birth control. They may wish to abstain from sex. And hope there is no surprise (good luck). That is decision one.
A separate issue concerns the "rules for dating single mothers" and I contend that they are the same rules for dating *anybody.* People with and without children are human. Treat them with respect and the way you would want to be treated. Having children or not having children shouldn't influence how anyone should be treated.
My opinion for what it is worth.
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John Moosie
climber
Beautiful California
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Not talking about personality. Talking about character. Everyone makes mistakes. What they did with them and if they learned anything are important. Relationships and how one deals with them reveal a persons character. Are they learning from their mistakes, or do they just keep on making the same ones over and over. That is character, not personality.
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hossjulia
Trad climber
Eastside
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back to the op, ignoring all the leb-s, (used cars indeed! What a jerk.)
Do you like kids? Or did you just happen to get interested in a hot mama?
If just the later, a short bout of fun might be had. If both, well, you might have something.
So, if you are not particularly fond of kids, don't get seriously involved with a single parent.
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