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Roadie
Trad climber
moab UT
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Topic Author's Original Post - May 19, 2018 - 03:01pm PT
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Don Reid is a Vampire
Don Reid is a vampire! OK, so I don't have any real proof yet so maybe I should have said- IS Don Reid a vampire[{?}] but that little backspace button doesn't seem to be working toady so I am just going to run with it.
As I write this, wreathed in garlic and cowering behind a crucifix I just made out of a deer leg and a tree branch I tied together with some twine, I am bivied in my friend Justin's driveway. Well, I am not like, IN his driveway hiding under the covers and overdosing on garlic fumes for any passing motorists to honk at or birds to sh#t on. That would be just- barbaric! I am- in my van- which is parked in his driveway. Which is really quite nice since this is the weekend and f*#king motor heads are, and will continue to be, ripping up the landscape and the silence until god knows when. Plus it has internet, the house that is, not the driveway but it seems to reach, which is also cool as I can be looking at Supertopo or porn or streaming cool old music that I haven't heard in like forever. And that is how I discovered that Don. Reid. Is. A. F*#king. Vampire!
So it all started like this, I googled The Guess Who, who, if you were born after about 1980 you have probably never heard of and I hate you by the way, totally rock! Then YouTube sucked me into their loop and fed me some Cream and Doors videos. This was all live concert footage by the way and got me feeling a little nostalgic. It was all from the late 60s and early 70s. You could almost smell the weed smoke seeping through the years and out of the screen. Or maybe that was just the neighbors but whatever.
So anyhow I decided to pop into the house while Justin was at work and check out what little tidbits might be stashed in the PARTY BOX! It wasn't hard to find just move a huge pile of climbing gear, rifle through some crates, look inside an old wetsuit and there it was, an old shoe box with the words PARTY BOX! scrawled with magic marker in an unsteady hand. Bingo!
Where was I, right, rifling through my friends sh#t and stealing his drugs. Whatever, he'll never know. Unless he reads this. F*#king backspace key. Sorry Justin. I'll give you three dollars or whatever if you ever get around to reading this. Don't hurry as I am pretty broke right now. Onward! What was I writing about? Oh yeah! Don. Reid. Is. A. F*#king. Vampire. I discovered this totally by accident. But I don't think that should discount the significance of my discovery too much. Look at all the important and worthwhile sh#t discovered by accident: X-rays, penicillin, yogurt, anal sex. Well, honestly that last one distracted me a little bit and I can't think of any others right now but I am sure they're out there and I could think of them if I could just stop thinking about sex. An age old problem that one. F*#king Christ! Where was I. Right, in the driveway.
So back in the driveway (in my van) YouTube was still rolling through the ages. It was cool, a brief interview with Clapton, followed by a young Bowie, and then THERE WAS DON REID! Except it wasn't DON. REID. THE. F*#KING. VAMPIRE. It was Steppenwolf, who also totally f*#king rock by the way if you were born after 1980 and I'm sad to say you f*#king missed it but not really because I still think you suck. Holy shit!!! I thought. The Lead singer of Steppenwolf looks just like Don Reid! I clicked the little thing to make the picture go to full screen and I looked closer. Holy sh#t (again), I thought. that guy doesn't just look like Don Reid, HE F*#KING IS DON REID!. How cool is that! I didn't know Don Reid was the lead singer for Steppenwolf. But then I noticed that this video was shot in 1969 and Don Reid looked EXACTLY like he did when I knew him in the 1990s. WHAT THE F*#K? How do you be the lead singer for Steppenwolf in the 60s and then write the best guidebook that ever lived in the 80s-without aging!??? Undead! That's how! F*#king vampires!
Ok, full disclosure here. I just made it sound like I knew Don Reid. It wasn't quite like we were pals and I tucked him into his coffin in the morning after binging on too much baby blood. I talked to him a few times in The Valley. Well, two for sure, maybe three. But both times and maybe all three if that third time actually happened and wasn't just the product of a deranged (slightly) mind, IT WAS F*#KING DARK OUT! Plus, I NEVER SAW HIM EAT OR DRINK!!! ANYTHING!!! That alone, were this the middle ages, would be enough to get you burned at the stake or at least tossed into the river in a sack of rocks.
Oh Man, Justin's dog just started whining. I brought her in here to distract DON. REID. THE. F*#KING. VAMPIRE. While I shove the tree branch end of my crucifix into his chest if he is on to me. Something is out there! Its banging on my door. Oh Christ! Oh f*#k!This might be the last thing I ever post here. It's been real cool and all. Please say something nice about me after I'm gone.....
Oh, um, it was just Justin. He's all pissed cuz I trashed his place, stole his dog and ate all his acid. I wondered what those tiny little purple tabs were. Awkward. Um, its probably best if we just forget this whole thing.
Thank you
Steve Seats
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Jon Beck
Trad climber
Oceanside
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May 19, 2018 - 04:01pm PT
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I am trying to guess who
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Jaybro
Social climber
Wolf City, Wyoming
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May 19, 2018 - 05:32pm PT
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Luna, curb this man!
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L
climber
Just livin' the dream on the California coast
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May 19, 2018 - 07:28pm PT
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Hysterical!
And you didn't even have to mention melting faces...
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Zay
climber
Monterey, Ca
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May 19, 2018 - 09:12pm PT
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oh. my. god. i havent laughed continuously for this lomg in a long... well, ever!
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phylp
Trad climber
Upland, CA
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May 19, 2018 - 10:07pm PT
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LOL!
Thank you!
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Tarbuster
climber
right here, right now
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May 19, 2018 - 10:25pm PT
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I know this is missing the point: cuz, like, it's the magic carpet ride of your prose that matters. And stuff.
But I'm doing it anyway:
John Kay + Steppenwolf ...
[Click to View YouTube Video]
Don Reid ...
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clinker
Trad climber
Santa Cruz, California
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May 20, 2018 - 12:57am PT
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Donini bites.
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Mungeclimber
Trad climber
Nothing creative to say
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May 20, 2018 - 08:53pm PT
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Seems legit. Heard it on internet from some guy all paranoid and sh#t...must be true.
Lol
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Jaybro
Social climber
Wolf City, Wyoming
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May 21, 2018 - 06:44am PT
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Here I thought he was one of the Ramones.....
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looking sketchy there...
Social climber
Lassitude 33
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May 21, 2018 - 01:19pm PT
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Makes more sense than most "theories" on the Internet.
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Tarbuster
climber
right here, right now
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May 21, 2018 - 02:08pm PT
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FACT: Don Reid digs the Ramones!
[Click to View YouTube Video]
But I think we're going to have to stick with the John Kay/Don Reid/vampire theory ...
By 2014, all four of the band's original members had died - lead singer Joey Ramone (19512001), bass guitarist Dee Dee Ramone (19512002), guitarist Johnny Ramone (19482004) and drummer Tommy Ramone (19492014).[4][5][6][7] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ramones
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Jaybro
Social climber
Wolf City, Wyoming
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May 21, 2018 - 02:26pm PT
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I knew that.....😎
We took my daughter to see Donnie, I mean the Ramones, when she was ten months old, (outside, in the back, with hearing protection) shes rocked ever since!
... and Before!
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Tarbuster
climber
right here, right now
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May 21, 2018 - 09:33pm PT
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Jon Kay, lead singer of Steppenwolf in an in-depth interview about lots of real stuff. (Full hour in length: maybe save it for last.)
[Click to View YouTube Video]
Ramones, in a very superficial interview:
[Click to View YouTube Video]
Joey Ramone in good humor:
[Click to View YouTube Video]
Donny Reid turned me onto Public Image Limited.
I saw this interview when it aired: Lydon is brilliant here, only breaking deadpan a few times:
John Lydon:
[Click to View YouTube Video]
Lydon with PiL in 2010:
[Click to View YouTube Video]
Regarding the 1986 release simply titled, Album:
Lydon remarked that Album was "almost like a solo album" since he was working on his own with several musicians. He said that Miles Davis came into the studio while the album was being recorded and commented that Lydon sang like Davis played the trumpet. Lydon said it was "still the best thing anyone's ever said to me."[19] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Album_(Public_Image_Ltd_album);
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