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Messages 1 - 10 of total 10 in this topic
Anastasia

climber
Home
Jun 25, 2013 - 01:14am PT
Did you say that out LOUD... Welcome to the club of "saying things you shouldn't." Though this week is must learn NOT to Speak ONE'S Mind.

Try it...

I find it torturing hard.
Wayno

Big Wall climber
Seattle, WA
Jun 25, 2013 - 02:35am PT
Only two posts and I'm already laughing at where this one could go. I used to consider farting an art and an heritage, but now it is just a prelude to embarrassment and discomfort.
mouse from merced

Trad climber
The finger of fate, my friends, is fickle.
Jun 25, 2013 - 02:43am PT
Relationships are like farting, If you push too hard... things could get messy real fast.
perswig

climber
Jun 25, 2013 - 07:11am PT
Invalid without pics.










No, wait.....um, never mind.
Dale

(Alternative reply = Lembert Dome?)
Norwegian

Trad climber
dancin on the tip of god's middle finger
Jun 25, 2013 - 07:37am PT
im pissed because my wife always
strives for hyper-strength coffee
so in my tragic-hour mornings i just
run a fresh carafe of water thru
her yesterday's grinds and
im only to win her left over coffee buzz,

which destroys my stomach because
i havent eaten enough and yesterday
i had too many beers,
and i only slept 4 hours
and now im updating formwork shop drawings,
so i go inside to score some
fast-breaking cereal and my
daughters only left me the crumby
and stale rice puffs that no one likes
and the milk is way expired so i marry it all
up in a cracked bowl and gag it down,
but i don't really mind because im
a trained-and-true dirtbag;

and by the way today im wearing hot-pink
cotton long johns that i salvaged from the
lost-and-found at my children's school;
and over those i've some women's jeans that
i got off the dollar rack,
and sometimes, when i get behind in laundry
i'll sneak into my wife's closet and
borrow her panties, not the lace type,
just the briefs though some of them
say victoria secrets across the elastic
keeper-upper band and once i was
wearing some low-riding jeans at work
and a co-werker noticed my panti-brand
and she gave me rub until the day i quit
that gig, and other days i'll go
high-angle logging in all this
fashion disaster,

what with me showing up in my prius
and all my gear in a giant purse,

"where'th the tree, boyths?" i toy,
with a forward shift of my left shoulder.

and these chew-spitting loggers;
all about ready to pin me to the dirt
until they see me wield my magic
high up and the tree tops they waft
down between buildings and high-voltage
like feathers escaping the
cloudy sky bivy where god is
outrageously humping satan in
a secret copulation of homo-diety
proportions...

you all want more information?
absolutely.
we've got too much and mostly useless informations....
all aimed at arousing and manipulating my audience's emotions.
mouse from merced

Trad climber
The finger of fate, my friends, is fickle.
Jun 25, 2013 - 10:05am PT
Who sharts on a Sespequidalian route, however, gets a hoot out of the toot to boot.

Fatesbook tells all.

The Fartress, eh?
Reeotch

Trad climber
4 Corners Area
Jun 25, 2013 - 10:12am PT
The look on yer face says it all Mr. E . . . ^^^^

Norwiegan, we need to get you in to some Carharts, bro. Time to graduate from dirtbag status, daddieo . . .
MisterE

Social climber
Jun 26, 2013 - 08:51pm PT
im pissed because my wife always
strives for hyper-strength coffee
so in my tragic-hour mornings i just
run a fresh carafe of water thru
her yesterday's grinds and
im only to win her left over coffee buzz,

which destroys my stomach because
i havent eaten enough and yesterday
i had too many beers,
and i only slept 4 hours
and now im updating formwork shop drawings,
so i go inside to score some
fast-breaking cereal and my
daughters only left me the crumby
and stale rice puffs that no one likes
and the milk is way expired so i marry it all
up in a cracked bowl and gag it down,
but i don't really mind because im
a trained-and-true dirtbag;

and by the way today im wearing hot-pink
cotton long johns that i salvaged from the
lost-and-found at my children's school;
and over those i've some women's jeans that
i got off the dollar rack,
and sometimes, when i get behind in laundry
i'll sneak into my wife's closet and
borrow her panties, not the lace type,
just the briefs though some of them
say victoria secrets across the elastic
keeper-upper band and once i was
wearing some low-riding jeans at work
and a co-werker noticed my panti-brand
and she gave me rub until the day i quit
that gig, and other days i'll go
high-angle logging in all this
fashion disaster,

what with me showing up in my prius
and all my gear in a giant purse,

"where'th the tree, boyths?" i toy,
with a forward shift of my left shoulder.

and these chew-spitting loggers;
all about ready to pin me to the dirt
until they see me wield my magic
high up and the tree tops they waft
down between buildings and high-voltage
like feathers escaping the
cloudy sky bivy where god is
outrageously humping satan in
a secret copulation of homo-diety
proportions...

you all want more information?
absolutely.
we've got too much and mostly useless informations....
all aimed at arousing and manipulating my audience's emotions.

...and THAT my friends, is how you troll a Norwegian!

;>)
Jaybro

Social climber
Wolf City, Wyoming
Jun 26, 2013 - 09:04pm PT
He wears that hat because he Sends!

My stalker made some evaluations of my climbing and myself as a person yesterday. I cut him slack, I'd feel bad if I was him, too.
Norwegian

Trad climber
dancin on the tip of god's middle finger
Jun 26, 2013 - 09:04pm PT
eric a few hours after i posted that rant,
i found myself way strung out.

150' up a tree in a howling wind storm,
driving rain.

im equipped though, for i have on my wife's long johns
(she totally laid claim to the pink jammies that i scored
from the lost-and-found bin)

because mine were wet from the previous day's endeavors
(more storm-shrouded tree work)

so im cool and collected, feeling like john muir
riding out this pissed-off top,
and i look down, and my undergarments are creeping
out around my gaffs (tree climbing spurs)

and then, those women's jeans!
they only hang on like an A2 clasp at the waist,
i blow this little worthless hook,
and my drawers are falling down beneath
my saddle (that's what us tree climbers call a harness)

so im fringed in hot pink,
and my client is totally taking pictures of me,
im kinda embarrassed though not really
because i pull off the job against all odds,
and she's now surfing fast internet
probably gawkking at my pink-panther asse peeking outta
my womens jeans as lightening and sailor clouds
enshroud my not-sorrowfully.
Messages 1 - 10 of total 10 in this topic
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