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Lynne Leichtfuss
Trad climber
Will know soon
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Oct 11, 2009 - 09:47pm PT
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OMG, never thought, I just may be a back up girl.........Now what ? :DDD
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GDavis
Social climber
SOL CAL
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Oct 11, 2009 - 09:55pm PT
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Strange... I don't know what my URL is even. All I get on Facebook is offers to join mafia wars. Sigh.
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noshoesnoshirt
climber
Arkansas, I suppose
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Oct 11, 2009 - 10:00pm PT
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The best time to look for a new job is while you still have your old one.
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nutjob
Trad climber
Berkeley, CA
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Oct 11, 2009 - 10:04pm PT
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Pheromones. It's all about pheromones.
You see, if he was a good guy and not in a relationship, you would subconsciously sniff that out and think, "well he seems nice but there's something about him...."
And so you are left with the taken ones who exude that irresistible scent of "I'm taken."
Or maybe the taken ones know they have nothing to lose, so they don't mumble, say stupid stuff, or run in the boys bathroom when you talk to them.
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Jaybro
Social climber
Wolf City, Wyoming
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Oct 11, 2009 - 10:06pm PT
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effing polygomists....!
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Jingy
Social climber
Flatland, Ca
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Oct 11, 2009 - 10:12pm PT
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we don't, if we are secure at all in our relationships...
good luck finding your non-back up type
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Russ Walling
Gym climber
Poofter's Froth, Wyoming
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Oct 11, 2009 - 10:12pm PT
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This hella belongs on a personal blog.
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Ksolem
Trad climber
Monrovia, California
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Oct 11, 2009 - 10:19pm PT
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I have a hard time getting Russ and self righteous in the same sentence...
:-)
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Mighty Hiker
Social climber
Vancouver, B.C.
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Oct 11, 2009 - 10:20pm PT
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Maybe it's on the bus theory.
But what would I know - don't have a first string one at the moment.
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Russ Walling
Gym climber
Poofter's Froth, Wyoming
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Oct 11, 2009 - 10:21pm PT
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t*r
over the river and through the woods
Topic Author's Reply - Oct 11, 2009 - 07:16pm PT
f*ck you russ, i'm sick of your self-righteous sh*t. this is entertaining.
Actually it is moronic, sophomoric, and besides being a thinly veiled self serving shoutout to your being "ok enough for a boy to like you", it's pathetic. You are right though. There is entertainment value in your particular version of insanity.
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slobmonster
Trad climber
berkeley, ca
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Oct 11, 2009 - 10:25pm PT
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It's also very educational.
Same thing applies for us gents, I assure you t*r. I've been a lady's front, middle, and back burner, and even thrown in the oven a few times. Next time just do your due diligence, and find out if he's available before exposing your vulnerable bits.
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BCD
Trad climber
Mammoth Lakes, CA
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Oct 11, 2009 - 10:27pm PT
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You know, the same question could be asked of the ladies out there. Why do they keep back-up guys?
And noshoesnoshirt nailed it. I just switched jobs with only a three day weekend in between.
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AbeFrohman
Trad climber
new york, NY
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Oct 11, 2009 - 10:31pm PT
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Sounds to me like the boy in question was actually Russ and now he's pissed cause he's been outed.
Russ, this is no longer just a climbing forum, get over it, or move to rc.com.
T*R, its just our nature. Sorry. 1 in the hand and all that.
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Lynne Leichtfuss
Trad climber
Will know soon
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Oct 11, 2009 - 10:33pm PT
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ksolem and locker, hilarious....hahahaha.
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Mighty Hiker
Social climber
Vancouver, B.C.
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Oct 11, 2009 - 10:39pm PT
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Please define the verb "to hit on" someone. If possible, please also define the term "dating". Allow for gender differences and communication challenges, and provide examples if possible.
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dirtbag
climber
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Oct 11, 2009 - 10:40pm PT
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tr, count your blessings. You learned something about the guy and can now move on.
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Lynne Leichtfuss
Trad climber
Will know soon
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Oct 11, 2009 - 10:54pm PT
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Along with Tami, t*r, some comments......
1) lots of times russo is just jivin'. He's got a great sense of humor. Don't always take him zeriously.
2) I have learned in the last year, first question you ask looking them straight in the eye....are you married or do you have a girlfriend. Never assume your ideals are theirs.
Now laugh alot and enjoy figuring out life. Cheers, lynnie
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nature
climber
Tucson, AZ
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Oct 11, 2009 - 11:00pm PT
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T*R, its just our nature.
it wasn't me
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ß Î Ø T Ç H
climber
. . . not !
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Oct 11, 2009 - 11:07pm PT
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you flatter yourself - implying he wanted to have you as a back up for a relationship . he probably just wanted to füç you - then throw you away like a dirty washrag .
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zip
Trad climber
pacific beach, ca
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Oct 11, 2009 - 11:09pm PT
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I don't think that there is anyone on this forum that is more qualified than me to answer this question.
Unfortunately I am I Phone only right now, cuz I am on a road trip,
If t*r hasn't deleted the thread by the time I get back, I will respond at length.
My quick and easy response would be to ask why women own so many shoes, when you can only wear one pair at a time?
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Captain...or Skully
Social climber
Idaho, also. Sorta, kinda mostly, Yeah.
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Oct 11, 2009 - 11:09pm PT
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Guess who's not expecting the best from human beans?
Frickin' humans. Who in Hell do they think they are?
Just another kind of explorin'.
I've got kind of a lot of shoes, too. ALL functional, though.
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Mighty Hiker
Social climber
Vancouver, B.C.
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Oct 11, 2009 - 11:10pm PT
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Well, I'm glad that t*r at least still has the soul of a romantic. Not to say that all you practical and grumpy people are wrong, just that it's refreshing that someone here still has such ideals, and is willing to express them.
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Lost A
Trad climber
Bumbling out West
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Oct 11, 2009 - 11:14pm PT
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Flirting is fun and for the most part harmless. At least this guy did tell you about his current relationship and not go any further than a brief encounter and a little FaceBooking. Many others try and take it further which is not cool. Count your blessing that you didn't get sucked into a nasty vortex.
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slobmonster
Trad climber
berkeley, ca
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Oct 11, 2009 - 11:17pm PT
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t*r, if you're still listening: if you can keep this population of hooligans, miscreants, and degenerates so enthralled on a quiet Sunday, then I'm sure your energy would be better spent doing other things online. Like DATING.
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Jaybro
Social climber
Wolf City, Wyoming
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Oct 11, 2009 - 11:18pm PT
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"people who genuinely respect the dignity of the individual do not treat one another this way. "
Yup!
Though, it is my experience that there are at least as many women as men who have their back up plan already figured out....
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Dick_Lugar
Trad climber
Indiana (the other Mideast)
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Oct 11, 2009 - 11:23pm PT
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I'm a Gemini...I have a back-up or two of everything.
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WBraun
climber
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Oct 11, 2009 - 11:24pm PT
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Man ..... what a fukin drama.
I'd take the K dorm flasher over this any day .......
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wack-N-dangle
Gym climber
the ground up
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Oct 11, 2009 - 11:27pm PT
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Because they can!
Unsoloicited advice: Go to a place where the ratio of dudes to women is more favorable: Yosemite, Alaska, Boys Town, etc.
Best wishes T*R
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WBraun
climber
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Oct 11, 2009 - 11:40pm PT
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Yeah
We had some tough ass chicks living in Camp 4.
What's with all this tweeting, and look at my face on some book blog gig now-a-daze.
The whole fukin world's nuts.
Where'd all the tough ass, kick ass chicks go?
Mimi, Tami and happigrrrl are tough ass examples. What's that other one Brenda puff.
geeezz where the fuk is Roxjox? or Rajmit
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WBraun
climber
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Oct 11, 2009 - 11:43pm PT
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At least locker's still in the game.
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WBraun
climber
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Oct 11, 2009 - 11:50pm PT
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Right on, hahaha
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Roman
Trad climber
Bostonia
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Oct 11, 2009 - 11:50pm PT
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You would probably think a dude was flirting if he opened a door for you.
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Wayno
Big Wall climber
Seattle, WA
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Oct 12, 2009 - 12:13am PT
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"I got a hot rod Ford and a ten dollar bill. A little spot right over the hill. We'll pretend that living is free. Why don't you come home with me?"
You know who.
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rich sims
Trad climber
co
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Oct 12, 2009 - 12:22am PT
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TR HA HA one of the early lessons I taught my daughters is guys lie!
I started age 3-4 telling them that the same time I told them first date would be dinner at home with mom and dad. Sure cut out a lot of noodle backs and slackers.
I remember the joy when I saw at about 10 to 11 they got it
Sixer to the first person to say where the photo was taken .Must be local or willing to wait.
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Wayno
Big Wall climber
Seattle, WA
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Oct 12, 2009 - 12:46am PT
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It's not really bullsh#t, it's human nature. When I don't have something appropriate to say, I can say some really dumb stuff. On a more serious side, I think what you are asking about is something everyone, sooner or later is going to face. There are a lot of imperfect people out there, And you and I are some of them. The lessons you have learned or are learning are not going to be the same lessons that the people that you meet have. That is very rare. Just enjoy being young and I think you are smart enough to figure out how to avoid such issues in the future.
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zeta
Trad climber
Berkeley
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Oct 12, 2009 - 12:47am PT
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this thread reminds me why i refuse to join facebook...the whole "friend-ing" "de-friending" and posting your relationship status, jeez!
seriously t*r, i think that this guy just hadn't really figured out how serious he was with someone else. Nothing wrong with keeping options open when things are vague, I'm just not a fan of seriously attached guys (for ex. with gf of many years) who flirt and pose as being available when they're clearly not.
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Ghost
climber
A long way from where I started
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Oct 12, 2009 - 12:49am PT
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t*r, most of the posts haven't been obfuscatory, and relatively few have been detracting. They almost all say the same thing in one way or another:
Guys keep back-up girls for the same reason girls keep back-up guys. They do it because they're human. As much as you would prefer it to be otherwise, as much as you think it shows a lack of respect (and as much as many here actually agree with that last), it is what humans do.
You don't like it? Fine. Many don't. But to act all surprised when it happens? Well, maybe when it happens for the first time, like when you're thirteen, but any adult who hasn't spent his/her life in a cave has run into this dozens of times.
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cyndiebransford
climber
31 years in Joshua Tree, now Alaska
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Oct 12, 2009 - 02:00am PT
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It's all about the chase....men and women enjoy the begining stages of relationships it is a high of sorts. Then reality sets in and back you go to your home boy or girl, most of the time.
I had a boyfriend who was the king of this type of behavior. We were together for 12 years and I knew he was always out there looking around. I was stupid enough to think he would outgrow it. He didn't and eventually met someone else he wanted to be with more, but he wanted me to wait it out. I finally had enough and never went back.
No more games for me. I want to believe in people. I am honest and want the same in return.
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Rob_James
Ice climber
Aoraki/Mt. Cook Village, New Zealand
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Oct 12, 2009 - 02:17am PT
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Hey dudette:
As a proud loser who's been shafted too many-a-time cause I ain't hot enough - your pain resonates.
But as to your boasting the four-year thrill of regurgitating what someone else has already figured-out at uni - I'm indifferent.
They say a lotta stuff down my way. Most of it irrelevant. Nonetheless - 'If you lend someone $20 and you never see them again; it was probably worth it'.
So I respectfully suggest you get your hair done. Yeah. Guys really like girls with nice hair. Yep. That's what my mates reckon.
And teeth. Guys like nice teeth. You've got nice teeth right? Surely, you must eat and stuff.
But guys don't like hairy teeth. No sir, how embarassment. Even I'm not that keen - she was really o'h so sweet and always had heaps of lettuce and carrots in the fridge when I visited. But man...............my worst prospect ever!
Send Russ a nice quiet message. You could make-up, make-out, and maybe you-tube (unfortunately I've only dial-up). But everyone could describe it for me.!
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Papillon Rendre
climber
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Oct 12, 2009 - 02:28am PT
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"He's Just Not That Into You"
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Mungeclimber
Trad climber
sorry, just posting out loud.
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Oct 12, 2009 - 02:37am PT
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"that's why it was a rhetorical question"
ok, I'm awake at this later hour, I'll ask a silly question...
if the original post was only a rhetorical question, then why ask it they way it was asked? Or ask at all?
rhetorical question from wikipedia... "a question posed for its persuasive effect without the expectation of a reply"
??
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Fish Finder
Social climber
THE BOTTOM OF MY HEART
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Oct 12, 2009 - 04:18am PT
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OMG
I cant beleive the guy is into fat chicks.
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fareastclimber
Big Wall climber
Hong Kong, but live in Wales...
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Oct 12, 2009 - 10:52am PT
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Why do guys try to keep back-up girls?
Well, the sort of the guy that does that is:
a.) Is an as#@&%e.
b.) Loves his dick more than his girl friend.
c.) Doesn't like being alone.
d.) Wants to feel like he has the upper hand/more dominance in a failing relationship. You wouldn't want to be dumped and left alone by your girl friend, you'd rather be the one to do it first... you wouldn't want to look weak in front of your friends now, do ya?
None of the above justifies such behaviour.
Just remember, what goes around, comes around and for this dude it will hopefully concern Karma and STDs.
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