Trip Report
TR: The Spirit of Hartouni (Joshua Tree wide cracks)
Sunday October 4, 2009 10:12pm
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So Will and I are sitting around drinking.... I mean we're sitting here working and we get to blabbing about going to do some JT OW..... after scouring the internet we keep bumping into a rig called Ipecac. It seems this thing always has the tag line of "go try it", and "must do" attached to various posts all over Usenet. I'm thinking sandbag. Being slightly fortified we finally figure out where it is located and head out loaded for bear.
It is a 122ft long gaping maw..... It reeks of physicality..... the grains are pretty large and a for all the world looks like a longer version of 1096 if you squint and the sun is in your eyes.
Here is the Beast in all its glory:
Missing photo ID#127698
Ok.... you are saying no way that thing is 122ft long. You are correct... the "1" in front of the "22" is a typo. It feels like 122ft, but might only be about 18.
Here is Will shown for scale.....
Missing photo ID#127699
It is pretty squeezy if you have been on a steady diet of BBQ and liquor since the Diet Challenge. Pro is good and you need nothing outrageous, just a few cams to 5" and then something thin for the top, which is the crux. It is awkward thin hands to fingers getting out of the maw with bad feet..... standard fare for Josh. If you fail to protect for the follower (like I did) you better hope they don't pop at the crux. They will for sure clang outta there and hit a couple of slabby ledges before they come to a bloody rest. As for living up to the name and the hype.... well..... Will might have got a small burp or two, but no actual vomit.
After ticking Ipecac we decide to do a warmdown (?) on Point of No Return. At a minimum we could go out there and look at it while drinking a beer. I had not been there in about 25 years and the memory fades..... so I decide to lead it, again.
Here is a vintage shot of Robert Carrere plugged into the business in 1980 or so:
Missing photo ID#127700
Will had a 12" BigBro that I futzed around with looking for a good placement while still in my tennies.... I found a placement, but it would only really keep me from rolling down the hill if I fell. Even though we were "loaded for bear", none of our cams or extruded extra long hexes were even remotely large enough to protect the start...
Missing photo ID#127701
oh well.... I boot up and launch into the thing. I don't really fit and have to go to the outside edge with a really tight chickenwing.... Will is nervous and moves into the cave at the start so I don't land on him if I pop. Good plan, as it is the kind of thing a larger man might pop out of.... and if he does, he has about a 1 in 15 chance of being able to walk back to the car unassisted. The grimness continues and the one cam I have is totally tipped out and pretty useless..... wiggle wiggle wiggle..... push cam higher.... wiggle wiggle wiggle..... push cam higher.... Yipee! The cam is finally good and the OW eases into a good rest before the interesting roof moves to belly roll onto the summit. Here is Will on the follow, right about the time a reliving burp saved him from throwing up in his mouth. This is right about where the #5 Camalot starts to work too....
Missing photo ID#127702
We had wild plans of doing the Triple Crown of JT OW's, which would include The Inquisition or The Maneater, but thank God it started to get dark and we could go home. We'll save those just in case Ed plans a visit.
Russ Walling
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About the Author Russ Walling is a gym climber from Poofter's Froth, Wyoming. |
Comments
bluering
Trad climber
Santa Clara, CA
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doesn't look easy getting out of that last one. That roof at the top....looks like you'd have to exit on the right side.
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nature
climber
Boulder, CO
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Nice TR.
If I'm not mistaken Ipecac is a "medicine" used to induce vomiting.
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aldude
climber
Monument Manor
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From a socio-anthropological viewpoint this obsession with burrowing and body stuffing must stem from primordial escape/defense strategy employed by Neolithic cave dwellers. Or are you just trying to regain the safety and security of the womb.....
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L
climber
Just livin' the dream
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Dang Russ,
I almost ralphed just lookin' at the pictures...
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Jaybro
Social climber
Wolf City, Wyoming
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Looks like good fun to me! thanks for sharing.
Ow is definitely a return to the womb thing but don't tell anybody.
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Prod
Trad climber
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Natural Light and Natural Ice? What's up with that?
Prod.
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Elcapinyoazz
Social climber
Joshua Tree
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KickASSSS™
The Point of No Return was a proud off the couch, beer fortified, scary lead by Russ (Ipecac at least had good pro). 100% chance of grievous injury if you blow the crux, unless you have a 10" cam. A green camalot won't even start to work until halfway up the wide section, and isn't really secure until about 2/3.
25' of climbing that feels like doing ten pitches and then getting in a bar fight.
This thing is NICE. So tight at the bottom you can't turn your head without losing all the skin on your nose, and basically bombay on the entry. At least you can inhale and get a no hands/no arms rest from a chest jam. Starts about 10" and gradually narrows to about 5" in the back at the top. Cool exit moves over the roof too.
Nature is correct, Ipecac is the stuff mom used to keep in the medicine cabinet in case the rugrats drank the drano and needed forced barfing.
Bluering, turning the roof is actually easy and alot of fun. I won't give away the secrets, but the easiest way isn't the most obvious one.
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Mungeclimber
Trad climber
Nothing creative to say
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The Spirit of Brutus is more like it on the first route. :)
nice TR!
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steelmnkey
climber
Vision man...ya gotta have vision...
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I belayed the mighty Brutus on that Ipecac thing once (not the FA). Nearly threw up from the effort.
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susan peplow
climber
Joshua Tree, CA
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Hey Monkey - I thought that Honewell banned the taco. What you doin' here mid-day?
~Sooze
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TopRopeGun
Trad climber
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In case of drinking drain-o...one should never induce vomitting.
Water down with copius amounts of beer....and follow with a whiskey chaser to shift the PH in your favor.
expect bad gas.
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Prod
Trad climber
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If you know someone who drinks drain-o you better start shining your shoes, cause you're going to a funeral.
Prod
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Elcapinyoazz
Social climber
Joshua Tree
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"Natural Light and Natural Ice? What's up with that? "
Crag beers. See, you usually need cans for your crag beers since they often travel unprotected in your pack, and something that's a weak flavored lager....basically barley-pop so it's not heavy or sticky in the 80 deg heat. So the first choice is usually Beast Ice, 5.9%, $4.99/12pk at Rite Aid.
But when Rite Aid is out of Beast Ice, and they run out quite often, the next stop is Natty Ice, and god forbid they run out of the ice beers, because then it's down to like Beast Light or Natty Light and you lose your 5.9% advantage.
In this case, we actually had a playmate mini cooler with some bottles of Red Hook ESBs as well as the Natty. When you come off one of these wide things, not far from vomiting, the lighter swill is more appealing. Rest assured, we made up for it with plenty of ESBs and Green labels with the steaks afterwards.
But really, you're missing the best part of that picture. When (if ever) was the last time you saw an 8" wide hex?
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TopRopeGun
Trad climber
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I was wondering about that beauty...what's the story there? Who made it?
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eeyonkee
Trad climber
Golden, CO
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Glad to see no one's doing any upside down foolishness.
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Prod
Trad climber
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Hey Elcapinyoazz,
I did notice the 8" hex and said to myself "Self, you don't see that too often" Reminded me of piles of stuff in Sibleys back yard from when he used to make Colorado Nuts.
Got it on the ice beer, thanks for the lesson. I guess I'm more of a light weight though as I stick to my Pabst at $12.99 a 30 pack from Rite aid. You know Pabst was voted Aberica's best beer in 1893...
Prod
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spyork
Trad climber
Tunneling out of prison
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Whoa, looks pretty hard *and* scary.
Nice going Russ!
Steve
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Melissa
Gym climber
berkeley, ca
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Did you make yourself some pinto spotted chaps? What is that thang in the beer and gear photo?
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Zander
climber
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Russ,
Here's a little J Tree thing that has your name on it.
It's just before Willow Hole. Ed and Jaybro might get to it first. thanks for the TR
Zander
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Jaybro
Social climber
Wolf City, Wyoming
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hmmm? I'm in. could be a good easter route!
"It ain't hip to sink that low,
unless your gonna pull,
a resurection!"
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Crimpergirl
Sport climber
Boulder, Colorado!
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You guys are a riot. Thanks for sharing.
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steelmnkey
climber
Vision man...ya gotta have vision...
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Hey Russ...lemme know if you wanna go plow that Zander thing. I'll bring out some o' the big guys. I can cover up to 18"
Sooze...H'well apparently only tossed a temp blockage on me...I was pretty surprised when it bounced back up.
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Jaybro
Social climber
Wolf City, Wyoming
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Sunday, you guys, I'll bring chocolate marshmallow easter bunnies. We can do this thing; if you can find it.
monkey, there's always v-tunnel.
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susan peplow
climber
Joshua Tree, CA
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Ha! Jaybro, you must have been typing your post as I was emailing you.
Holy crap. You, the monkey, Russ and Will. I'd better renew my CPR certification.
~Sooze
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Jaybro
Social climber
Wolf City, Wyoming
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Don't worry, I just re-upped mine, I'll gasp out protocol while you do the work.
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Ed Hartouni
Trad climber
Livermore, CA
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I feel so jealous! ok Jaybro... you've gotta be very nice to visitors!
what was that scene in the Grail? putting up pictures of bucolic climbing and tempting out-of-state climbers??
Bad, wicked, naughty Jaybro!
Wicked, wicked Jaybro ... he is a bad person and he must pay the penalty. And here in the Castle JTree, we have but one punishment
... you must tie him into a rope ... and spank him. Come!
A spanking! A spanking!
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Jaybro
Social climber
Wolf City, Wyoming
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and then the o-oh never mind.
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Mighty Hiker
climber
Outside the Asylum
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Spankings? Who says OW climbers are weird?
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Watusi
Social climber
Newport, OR
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Wow Russ, I haven't thought of The Maneater since Bill Russell and I did the first way back...
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Jaybro
Social climber
Wolf City, Wyoming
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You guys did first on Maneater, Mike? No wonder it felt so welcoming.
I saw It on the way to a TR solofest of O'/banger. Could not resist it's siren call. Scrambled up and placed a #5 cam attached via a long sling to my harness. Made it through the bidness and unclipped the 'biner when the sling got tight. Afterwards I scrambled up and removed the green. A very cool route.
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426
climber
☬
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Fess up, who's done the "Appendectomy Crack"...that's gotta be on the Quadriple Crown™ ™ ™ ™ Tour.
Natty Ice is a popular crag pop here...see empties all over the boulders...
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the kid
Trad climber
fayetteville, wv
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yo fish daddy...
we got some nice wide cracks just for you here in WV...
Look me up at the new and I'll show you some good ones....
believe it or not, there is good climbing east of California!!!
KS
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dee ee
Mountain climber
Of THIS World (Planet Earth)
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Spotted Pinto chaps? Are those in the catalog or special order, "hands on" fitting required? Assless?
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Ed Hartouni
Trad climber
Livermore, CA
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I thought that was some dried-blood stained piece of clothing...
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TopRopeGun
Trad climber
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um....when was the last time you saw chaps WITH an ass?
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Russ Walling
Social climber
from Poofters Froth, Wyoming
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Author's Reply
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Apr 3, 2007 - 05:06pm PT
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Sorry wishful thinkers, not chaps. That is the top flap to my PescaPack™™™™ (eat your hearts out)
L: who says we ain't bloody after these things?
The hex is #10 stock right from the GPIW. Cut to length by Charles Cole. I think he made a few of these to take on Ace of Spades or something. That one is 8" long, thus the #8 on the body.
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Zander
climber
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Russ, Jaybro, Steelmonkey and Susan,
I wish i could go with you guys. You won't have any trouble finding it. Send some pictures home to family will ya.
Zander
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Jaybro
Social climber
Wolf City, Wyoming
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In the chaps?
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steelmnkey
climber
Vision man...ya gotta have vision...
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All righty...I'm all packed...
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Ed Hartouni
Trad climber
Livermore, CA
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oh ya! that looks sooo familiar...
nobody get hurt, ya hear! (dig the knee pads).
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Watusi
Social climber
Newport, OR
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Gosh all this talk of the wide got me back to the "Jaws" A bit of wide in the ol' Valley, I was told we were gonna bleed and I did!! Me and Werner did send that day while Russ and Charles Cole did do their best...Pics to follow!
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Jaybro
Social climber
Wolf City, Wyoming
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"looks like a damn, religous icon." -re stellmonkey rack.
'tusi, though I missed that expedition, I was in the valley then, you guys all looked at least sore the next day, I remember you limping, I swear. Werner, of course, looked untouched.
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Watusi
Social climber
Newport, OR
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I was overhead heel to toe barrin', swearin', and bitchin'!!! Werner straight out arm-barred that monster and proved us all LIGHT!!!
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Russ Walling
Social climber
from Poofters Froth, Wyoming
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Author's Reply
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Jul 14, 2007 - 05:11pm PT
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A bump for Phat-ness™™™™ on the front page.
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Karl Baba
Trad climber
Yosemite, Ca
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Jul 14, 2007 - 08:13pm PT
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As for that wide little boulder problem...
Piece of Cake!
Better you than me...
Peace
karl
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Jaybro
Social climber
Wolf City, Wyoming
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Jul 14, 2007 - 09:31pm PT
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That guy and ( and members of his posse)is/are going up to do some virgin wide tomorrow!
phat vibes!
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scuffy b
climber
heading slowly NNW
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Jul 16, 2007 - 10:58am PT
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Interesting hat in Steelmonkey's foto (post 40)
Jay: Phatima and India Pale
both moderate but pretty toothy, and lots of the teeth were
easy to pull. Crux on these, for the leaders, was having the
rack on the wrong side.
Gary got the 2nd of Bicameral Thoughts which was shorter
and less steep than I recalled but pretty fun.
The sweep brush worked GREAT on the short hideous leaner
(potential instant modern future classic, I'm So Sure) but after
rammin my head into the narrow bit I'm not at all convinced I'll
get it.
That Other Thing (that won't clean itself) is almost in the line
of fire. Next solo day, whenever that is.
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steelmnkey
climber
Vision man...ya gotta have vision...
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Jul 16, 2007 - 11:07am PT
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Hat? You mean the kneepads in the middle? :-)
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scuffy b
climber
heading slowly NNW
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Jul 16, 2007 - 12:32pm PT
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Oops. Yes, of course, I meant the kneepads. I guess it's not so
interesting anymore. If a hat had that much duct tape? The
stories it could tell? This sort of ties in...
7/9/07
When I got home Sunday evening, waiting for me were my brand new
7"square and 5"round CHIMNEY SWEEPING BRUSHES and two 48"
extension rods...
like they say in cheerleader school, or maybe it's somewhere else,
"GO, PROJECTS, GO!!!!!!!!!"
OK, here's the trip report part of this post...
Sat AM Jay rolls into the Vista, we do some of the things at the lot (the
main 4, not the scary ones), and I sez to him, I sez...
"Wanna have another go at that wild OW flake over there?"
And HE sez...uh...I think he sez "Yeh sure" or somethin like that... so we
troop on down there, big ol 140 second approach, drop the baby rope
down from the top (it's cool, bomber stance hip belay with view straight down the crack, bowline on coil to encourage lowering intead of hanging [you get pretty gassed]) and then...WE HAVE AT IT!!!!!!!!
I go first. I start to armbar, toss a knee up into the 5" section, say to
myself Jeez this is frickin STEEP. He sez "Yer cruisin it"
So I say unto him "I'm still on that big foothold."
He says "oh."
So then..."I got my foot off the hold...hang on...I got a heel-toe...this is
frickin STEEP"
So I keep going up it, trying to do by hand what would properly be
performed by a dude with a 7" chimney brush and rods standing on top
of the rock (it's not really all that tall, Folks) and feeling my left ear sort
of filling up with granite crumbs.
After a bit the lip gets less good but I'm able to get high enough to think
about seeing whether the pinched-down section is really too big for my
fist, so I do even though that's too high, and sure enough it's too big, so
we agree that Grug Eeyonkee would get a bomber fist but not us, and
the next thing I know I'm airborne and being lowered into the scrub oak.
Then we swapped ends and reversed roles with eerily similar results.
Who'd a thunk?
But we agree that it's HELLA COOL, it'll be so good to fire this...
Like, Instant Modern Classic kind of quality if that's what winds your
watch (whatever)...
So he sez..."Is there something like that but Right Side In, maybe taller,
about 10a and In The Shade?"
Well of course the answer is "No, but how about a thin hands prolem out a
horizontal roof?"
Then we bled.
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goatboy smellz
climber
Gulf Breeze
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Jun 10, 2008 - 11:35pm PT
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Time for round 2 scuffy?
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scuffy b
climber
heading slowly NNW
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Jun 11, 2008 - 10:58am PT
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Round 2 happened quite a while ago, Goatboy. As did 3, 4, 5...
I got up it once last September, but then I convinced myself
that we must have been tuning the 'cello.
Only tried it once this year, got 1.5 inches from grabbing the
top.
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Russ Walling
Social climber
from Poofters Froth, Wyoming
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Author's Reply
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Feb 25, 2009 - 09:02pm PT
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wide bump
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Jingy
climber
Random Nobody
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Feb 25, 2009 - 09:19pm PT
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What's with the sudden bout of blatant self promotion?
Bump
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Fish Finder
climber
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Feb 25, 2009 - 09:21pm PT
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Hey Jingy
Back Off
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Russ Walling
Social climber
from Poofters Froth, Wyoming
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Author's Reply
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Feb 25, 2009 - 10:32pm PT
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It's a "favorite TR" bump day Jingy..... those were of course my favorites.
C'mon, give us a treat.... write a TR about your masturbation routine in the cubicle. Omit nothing.
oh... did this just bump it?
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DJS
Trad climber
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Mar 19, 2009 - 08:37pm PT
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Bump
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DJS
Trad climber
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Mar 19, 2009 - 09:11pm PT
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Bump
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mike m
Trad climber
black hills
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Poofters Froth and Wolf City,WY TR's coming soon.
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Karen
Trad climber
Prescott, AZ ~
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Dec 22, 2011 - 12:11am PT
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That looks painful but after all, I am a stink bug climber.
Cool though!
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Wade Icey
Trad climber
www.alohashirtrescue.com
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Dec 22, 2011 - 11:33am PT
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skating on stilts
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grover
climber
Castlegar BC
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scab bump
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justthemaid
climber
Jim Henson's Basement
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Jan 22, 2013 - 09:50am PT
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bump for real climbing
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