Trip Report
First Ascent on Lower Tokopah Dome!
Wednesday April 22, 2015 9:34am
"Great things happen in small places. Jesus was born in Bethlehem. Jesse Jackson was born in Greenville." - Jesse Jackson

TOKOPAH VALLEY. SMALL PLACE, WHERE GREAT THINGS HAPPEN. LIKE THE FIRST ASCENT OF A NEW BIG MEGA ALPINE ROUTE MANGO LASSI LULZ MACHINE IN NEAR WINTER CONDITIONS. WITH RATING OF 5.10+ AND LENGTH OF 620 VERTICAL FEET, HELL, I WOULD NOT BE SURPRISED IF IT WON THE NEXT PIOLET D'OR.

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#WEWILLSPRAYBRAH
#WEWILLSPRAYBRAH
Credit: Vitaliy M.
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VEry Dangerous approach


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Setting up the bombproof basecamp after a giant two hour approach


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Super secret spire ONLY LOCALS KNOW ABOUT


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Steep chicken-heads!!

This route has a rich history. After placing my first bolt - retrobolt to protect the start of Welcome to Wallmart (5.10+), the FA party got offended, so I was like 'Bro, nevermind, see that roof with a splitter? I was actually starting a new line up that!" My friend was like OK, I will hold your rope next time. After we put up Tokopah Reality, it was time to walk the walk and go big. I placed bolts from sketchy hooks and stances. Five more bolts on a 5.8 slab was damn hard and I was done. I got worked and said I would come back to finish the job some other time.

When I returned in a few months, I was with a good friend who was SUPER excited to try his first new route. Can anyone guess what happened? Dr. V forgot the drill bits. Not the hammer, not the rack, rope, his food, or tent - a few freaking drill bits that weight nothing. Battle was lost, but I knew there would be a war ahead. And my friend was not super psyched.


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The daunting roof


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#Thankgodjugsonpitchone

Than I read this quote...

"I really want people to understand that nobody is perfect and that things happen in life beyond our control." -Lil' Kim

Cool, obviously forgetting the drill bits wasn't my fault. It was a sign from above. A sign that before I get on that roof, I should be a little stronger. A little lighter, and know how to drill from shittier stances.


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Adam on 5.8 slab to start the first pitch


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Me starting pitch two, looking like I should be on the cover of GQ


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Adam enjoying 5.superfun jughaul on pitch two. Chicken heads for 50 meters!

A year or so later the time for another battle approached. One of my LULZIEST friends from San Diego, Adam, was excited to do something completely pointless, so we took a day off work and met up in the Wolverton Parking lot at 5:30am on a Friday. Than we were like 'oh bro, we should be in Lodgepole,' so we drank coffee, I had Indian food with Mango Lassi, and we organized the rack. This time I double checked for drill bits. Only thing which was overlooked was the amount of toilet paper we required. But that does not have anything to do with the name of the route....

Anyway, first time I saw Tokopah Domes was on a cold ice climb, which at the time was a mixed climb. Moonage Daydream (wi4 M4) - The Watchtower. By some sort of a coincidence it was the first time Adam and I climbed together. I pointed it out to him that time and said "homez, do you think there are a lot of routes on those domes, they look clean bro!?" He was like "The Chief has done them before you were a sperm in your daddy's sack." Without a doubt it was very special to come back to Tokopah Valley and climb a new route on the Lower Dome with Adam.


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Cool friction 5.9 and a fun overhang on the third pitch


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Must be some more climbing there somewhere?


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Tokopah Falls are beautiful even from far away

We got to the base, I looked at seemingly closely spaced bolts on pitch 1 and said "that sh#t wouldn't slide in Toulumne brah. It will be easy peasy to the roof since a noob placed them a year ago." Than I was kind of surprised that stances I drilled from felt super crappy and I took my time getting up it. Going over the roof, my foot blew for a second but I was able to regain my balance and get into the crack above. After placing a good cam following by a marginal placement I went for the stance and tried to fiddle a hook on some edge. It was sort of steep and a bit pumpy. The hook wouldn't stay which send more sweat into my fingers than I would want. After a good time dancing I remembered the words of a wise man - Tom - "if you could stand and f*#k with that hook for 5 minutes, you might as well stance drill!" So I drilled in a bolt and fired the moves into the next stance, a much better one. Somehow I got through the crux and onto thank god jugs without taking a big whipper. Hopefully the next guy doesn't think it is easy up there!
After Adam got to the belay stance, I was like "Yo! If I blew that first stance I would go for a good one, maybe past the roof, if the marginal cam held." He looked at me with a smile and replied, "Oh you would go wayyyy past the roof!" Maybe if I did not forget those drill bits a year ago it would be a different story? Will never know, but I will definitely read more quotes from Lil Kim.

INTERMISSION FROM CLIMBING, MY FEET NEED A BREAK!


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I wish my camp will have views of The Watchtower like this...


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30 foot boulder we dubbed The Bear. Likely because it looks like a lizard.


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"I am tired of slab climbing bro, let's dream of soaking our feet in an ice cold stream!"


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Good design for a future tattoo. DA BRIM IN DA HOUSE!!!

Rest of the route went great. Pitch two was well protected by slinging the chicken heads. I used a slipknot and felt like I could hang an elephant from one if I had to - 5.superfun is the rating. #monkeysaresending Pitch 3 was even better, with some 5.9ish friction and a cool little overhang that went at 5.10- or so. I belayed Adam from two chicken heads which were so bomber he didn't even comment on my knotted dyneema sling. IF he was on supertopo he would parade my torso on main street after seeing a photo of that anchor.


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Dose it qualify to be bomber? At least Donini would take it!


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Good day! We didn't use our AK!


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Taking the views in!


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I will be back here again sometime! Likely to establish a v16 on the summit boulder


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Time to eat, time to sleep! But first, let's make a fire and tip each other on how to become a better narcissistic sociopath


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And if people wondered, the time to soak our feet did come. Wear your comfortable shoes on this one!


"I think I got a lot of life skills; I got a lot of wisdom; I've seen a lot of bad things happen to a lot of good people." Young Jeezy

Drink a Mango Lassi before climbing this route. Only good things will happen, trust me.
For those who naked free soloed the route back in 1975, put one in the chamber and prepare for torso parade!

More spray: vividrea1ity.blogspot.com

BETA on TOKOPAH DOMES:
http://mountainproject.com/v/lower-tokopah-dome/109057316
http://www.sekiclimbing.com/tokopah-domes.html


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Credit: Vitaliy M.
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Happy climbing! ;)

  Trip Report Views: 4,122
Vitaliy M.
About the Author
Vitaliy M. is annoying gym climber from San Francisco.

Comments
this just in

climber
Justin Ross from North Fork
  Apr 22, 2015 - 09:35am PT
I got the FC of this FA. Now I will actually read it.
Vitaliy M.

Mountain climber
San Francisco
Author's Reply  Apr 22, 2015 - 09:41am PT
After reading it you will have to leave another comment. :)
this just in

climber
Justin Ross from North Fork
  Apr 22, 2015 - 09:48am PT
Some great quotes in there. Lil Kim's probably my favorite. I knew she was a lyrical genius, but that sh#t is deep.

Team lulz coming through once again. Nothing quite like chickenheads. Congrats on the FA and thanks for the pics and write up.
donini

Trad climber
Ouray, Colorado
  Apr 22, 2015 - 09:54am PT
Looks sweet but slow down goddamnit....you're making me tired!
Jones in LA

Mountain climber
Tarzana, California
  Apr 22, 2015 - 09:54am PT
First class. Thanks for sharing the adventure!

Rich Jones
micronut

Trad climber
Fresno/Clovis, ca
  Apr 22, 2015 - 10:06am PT
"You listen to thugs, it don’t make you one;
Never met a Blood or Crip, but you act like one."

-Mystic
from Da Beatminerz’ w/Statik, 2004.
Friend

climber
  Apr 22, 2015 - 10:32am PT
"If I got a problem a problem got a problem till it's gone" - ODB

NICE boys!
I want that Bear boulder. Stash it in Burchey's pack when he's not looking and have him cart it down here to so cal.
micronut

Trad climber
Fresno/Clovis, ca
  Apr 22, 2015 - 10:39am PT
This may be the TR of the year man. Da stoke be drippin' from dis one boyeee! MAd props on that route. Looks like gold in them there hillz.
Larry Nelson

Social climber
  Apr 22, 2015 - 10:41am PT
Your TR's are great. TFPU
Mungeclimber

Trad climber
Nothing creative to say
  Apr 22, 2015 - 10:58am PT
ICanHasLulz?!
Vitaliy M.

Mountain climber
San Francisco
Author's Reply  Apr 22, 2015 - 11:08am PT
I want that Bear boulder. Stash it in Burchey's pack when he's not looking and have him cart it down here to so cal.

That boulder is like 30 ft!
crøtch

climber
  Apr 22, 2015 - 11:35am PT
limpingcrab

Gym climber
Minkler, CA
  Apr 22, 2015 - 11:45am PT
Tom - "if you could stand and f*#k with that hook for 5 minutes, you might as well stance drill!"


This made me laugh! Sounds exactly like Tom!
Big Mike

Trad climber
BC
  Apr 22, 2015 - 11:56am PT
Lol!! Sick route boys! Looks rad.

My first time at Shuteye i asked the Ross bro's if either of them had ever whipped on chickenhead. Both of them emphatically said "NO!!!".

"Well then how do you know they're bomber then??"

"We don't!"

Lol
Vitaliy M.

Mountain climber
San Francisco
Author's Reply  Apr 22, 2015 - 12:06pm PT
"Well then how do you know they're bomber then??"

If you whip in one of those sections, you will likely get impaled on one :) They are BIG! I never whipped on a #2 cam before neither :)
johntp

Trad climber
Punter, Little Rock
  Apr 22, 2015 - 12:07pm PT
That boulder is like 30 ft!

Nah. It's an inch and a quarter on my screen.
Big Mike

Trad climber
BC
  Apr 22, 2015 - 12:21pm PT
I never whipped on a #2 cam before neither :)

They work great when well placed.. ;)

Chickenhead fall.. Ughh. That wouldn't be pretty..
JEleazarian

Trad climber
Fresno CA
  Apr 22, 2015 - 12:30pm PT
Another classic trip report. Well done - but all too rare.

Thanks much.

John
skcreidc

Social climber
SD, CA
  Apr 22, 2015 - 01:06pm PT
After looking at what you two just put up, climbing at the Creek looks just a little less intimidating. Good job with the vision Vitaly!! And thanks again for the inspiration.
survival

Big Wall climber
Terrapin Station
  Apr 22, 2015 - 01:19pm PT
A deep shadow of awesomeness has descended upon you!

Great TR, and really good pictures. I love shots of the whole route with the line drawn in, I always have!!



Congratulations guys!
cragnshag

Social climber
Gilroy
  Apr 22, 2015 - 02:06pm PT
well done route and very entertaining TR
Big Mike

Trad climber
BC
  Apr 22, 2015 - 02:34pm PT
I would love to see a drop test done on a chickenhead... Lol
Vitaliy M.

Mountain climber
San Francisco
Author's Reply  Apr 22, 2015 - 02:40pm PT
crankster

Trad climber
No. Tahoe
  Apr 22, 2015 - 03:40pm PT
Awesome!
Friend

climber
  Apr 22, 2015 - 03:44pm PT
That boulder is like 30 ft!

Burcheystyley bump:

Your mom is like 30 ft!!!!
Nick

climber
Dazed, Confused
  Apr 22, 2015 - 07:13pm PT
A good adventure in a good place. Bravo!
drljefe

climber
El Presidio San Augustin del Tucson
  Apr 22, 2015 - 08:11pm PT
The rock looks so good...
I tip my hat to you for a fine route
SC seagoat

Trad climber
Santa Cruz, Moab, Bozeman, the ocean, or ?
  Apr 22, 2015 - 08:14pm PT
Wowsa! You do the best trip reports.
Thanks for another great one...boy you guys had a great time!


Susan
Grippa

Trad climber
Salt Lake City, UT
  Apr 23, 2015 - 06:54am PT
Haha awesome tr you weirdos.
anita514

Gym climber
Great White North
  Apr 23, 2015 - 07:10am PT
Congrats on the climb and congrats on Burchey's diagnosis. Which StuporTopo genius came up with that?


survival

Big Wall climber
Terrapin Station
  Apr 23, 2015 - 11:22am PT
Bump for the guys that are really getting it done.

Burt Bronson would be proud.
Do you guys know who Burt is? You should look up his original threads, they're massively funny.

Hats off men!!
Sierra Ledge Rat

Mountain climber
Old and Broken Down in Appalachia
  Apr 23, 2015 - 12:42pm PT
Wickedly cool rock

Lucky bastards
Vitaliy M.

Mountain climber
San Francisco
Author's Reply  Apr 23, 2015 - 12:46pm PT
Do you guys know who Burt is?

He was good! Too bad he left the site :(

Even though there are still like 30+ walls I want to visit, I want to get back to Tokopah sometime soon. The place is great. Adam you should post those maps you sent me in here. SOme other people may find them useful.

We use perfectly flat rock slab for camp. It is like 30 seconds from a clean water source and 15 mins from the Lower Dome. Upper Dome looks further, but is also about 15 mins away.
Vitaliy M.

Mountain climber
San Francisco
Author's Reply  Apr 23, 2015 - 02:46pm PT
Here are the directions I have up on MP.

Park at Lodgepole in a big lot before the entrance to the campground.

Hike east on a road till you cross a bridge. From there do not continue up the valley (east) but take the Twin Lakes trail that cuts up and north through the campground.

Hike on Twin Lakes trail for about 20-30 mins till you reach a hump after which the trail starts heading down. Don’t go down hill, but cut east through the forest. From here it is cross country. Stay as close to the crest of the ridge as possible. Take the path of least resistance. After you pass a major uphill climb (maybe after one and a half hours of hiking?) you want to stay right of the ridge-line and traverse towards the domes, which should be visible in the distance fairly soon. If you continue going up the ridge you will be above them. Hike to camp should take about 1.5-3 hours (depending on your fitness). Camp on a nice slab by a clean water stream. There are two close to each other. It takes another 15 minutes to reach the Domes which are just NE E of you. Lower Tokopah Dome is the prominent lower dome with a large chimney system splitting its SW Face.
When you are done, pack out all your trash. Leave the area as you found it, CLEAN!
melski

Trad climber
bytheriver
  Apr 28, 2015 - 04:22pm PT
just might have to puton ze list [gansta shi fo yo bros] organic pro of that calibier calls
Vitaliy M.

Mountain climber
San Francisco
Author's Reply  Oct 21, 2015 - 04:20pm PT
U herdal?
I can't believe no one bagged the 2nd ascent yet (that I know of)! Such a sweet area, especially for this time of the year.
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