John and Sharon had just wrapped up some sort of geophysical survey in the western Great Basin just as I was completing my mapping assignments in eastern Nevada around Pioche. John and I concluded that since we were co-located within the same time zone for the first time in many moons that we ought to synchronize our watches for some sort of alpine buffoonery. Sharon was fully on board with the buffoonery part of the equation so we arranged to meet in Lone Pine. John had been teaching Sharon how to rock climb and we surmised that the classic east face route on Mount Whitney would be a user-friendly introduction to longer rock climbs in an alpine setting. “Fifty crowded climbs of North America” indicates that this route is only about 5.4 in difficulty, but the exposure is truly spectacular for a climb of that technical ease. The hike in was yet another reminder of just how quickly trails on the east side of the Sierras gain elevation. We set up camp by a lovely lake just east of the east face. As near as I can tell, only lovely lakes are even allowed in the Sierra Nevada, all non-lovely lakes are strictly prohibited!

As John and Sharon settled in to do whatever it is couples do when they are knackered from the hike in, I went off to reconnoiter the approach to the climb for the following morning. And reconnoiter I did, as I was about half way up the route and pulling through some easy moves on the traverse from the sloping ledge into a chimney/dihedral combo, marveling at the thousands of feet of clear air beneath my fanny (pack). About that chimney/dihedral thingy, either I was somewhat off route or Californians have a very liberal definition of what exactly 5.4 climbing entails. There were moves that felt solid at 5.6, but they were indeed on solid holds and I felt comfortable, if somewhat surprised by it all. By and by I caught up with a climbing guide from Lost Wages and his client on the last pitch, and we enjoyed each other’s company on the final scramble to the summit. As long as I was out and reconnoitering about, I figured I should probably reconnoiter the way back down to camp as well.

The following morning dawned cloudless and beautiful, as usual – does California even have bad weather? After our typical breakfast of instant goat meal and caustic comment tea, we were off. The climbing really is pretty easy, so either John or I would belay Sharon and the other one would scamper about taking pictures and offering encouragement. John led the airy traverse and Sharon was duly impressed by the exposure.

Since John and I were much more accustomed to climbing mountains in Colorado and Wyoming, we had a day pack with extra food and water, rain gear, hats, and gloves. There we sat, on the summit in our wool clothes, surrounded by dozens of people in shorts, tee shirts, running shoes, and maybe a pint of water. We were wondering “who are these people?” as they, doubtless, were wondering the same thing about us. The only conclusion that we could arrive at is that it never does storm in the Sierras, and what happened to the Donner party was a total fluke – bummer for them. Well, bye the bye we wandered back down the descent couloir on the north side of the mountain, the same one I had reconnoitered the previous day, got to camp, and descended the trail to a wonderful meal in Lone Pine. The next day we drove back to Lost Wages where we each caught a flight back to our own part of the world.

On the drive back we heard on the radio that the guy who invented the Hostess Twinkie had died that morning. In remembrance we stopped at a convenience store and each bought a package of twinkies and a coke, and felt wretched for the rest of the drive back. I have not eaten a hostess product since, and this was in the late 1980’s. Also on the drive back we took California 168 east out of Big Pine. Near as we could tell this road was created when some guy drove a paving machine down this narrow little canyon between flash floods – only road I have ever seen where the shoulder on both sides of the road is a cliff. Bet most people don’t miss their turns on that one!