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Stevee B
Mountain climber
Oakland, CA
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Aug 12, 2012 - 09:44pm PT
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My first sponsor told me he only had to remember two things: "I have to remember where i came from and that I can't do it alone."
I used to go to lots of dead shows when I first got sober and I found the key was to bring another alcoholic with me. It really helped until I was able to get a solid foundation in the program underneath me. Now I can go a lot of places without a chaperone ;-) but no way could I have in the first years.
Don't be too hard on yourself. Nearly every alcoholic or addict will slip when alone in that sort of situation.
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Plaidman
Trad climber
South Slope of Mt. Tabor, Portland, Oregon, USA
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Aug 12, 2012 - 10:18pm PT
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Brandon -
Hang in there. You are doing the right thing by sharing your experience. It is a tough row to hoe starting out. I didn't even go into a bar or hang out around people drinking for at least 3 or 4 years. I had to change all my play mates and play places. Now after 26 years I hardly even think about not going anywhere I want to. Hell my wife( not an alcoholic)has been drinking all day as we are cleaning the house. That is the only way she can handle cleaning. I just had to suffer. DEEP CLEANING SUCKS!!!!! We got the house mostly under control. We just love to climb so much the house really got WAY out of hand.
Well sorry for the thread drift. You will be done drinking when you are done. Jump back on the horse and don't get too down on yourself. I had a slip too. Then hit it like a vengeance and never looked back. If you really want it and are will to go to any lengths to stay sober it can happen for you. It worked for me and I was a total flake. I am pulling for ya man.
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slodog
Trad climber
ontario canada
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Aug 12, 2012 - 10:33pm PT
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13 years in a couple days-i dont ussually say much around here-mostly just lurking and well i wonder if this is the place for this topic[plenty of sobriety based forms out there]-but i must say-dont waiste your life fighting booze-just give up and get on with it-in my wildest dreams things could never have been as good as they are in reality today as a by product of simply not drinking.i'm heading to the valley this fall for my first wall-long time coming for sure i'm no spring chicken-this would never have been possible if i was still drinking-cause well... i'd be dead no doubt.if your a drunk as i am you have 3 choices-get sober-go insane or die
that friends is my two cents.
cheers
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Largo
Sport climber
The Big Wide Open Face
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Aug 12, 2012 - 11:11pm PT
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Contrary action. Never easy. Saves our lives. If I go on impulse I'm dead. Higher Power. Service. But mostly go to meetings.
JL
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tradmanclimbs
Ice climber
Pomfert VT
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Aug 12, 2012 - 11:12pm PT
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My sister's huge party was great success once again. I played 3 full sets and the 5 piece country band played 3 sets. lots of real big heads sunday morning.. watching these guys Always makes me feel better about not drinking
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Kenygl
Trad climber
Salt Lake City
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Aug 12, 2012 - 11:57pm PT
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Get through today. Tomorrow is another day another chance. No judgement just grace and forward movement.
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Plaidman
Trad climber
South Slope of Mt. Tabor, Portland, Oregon, USA
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Aug 13, 2012 - 09:14pm PT
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@Kenygl - ^^^^^^ Good stuff man. Keep it light and stay positive.
Try this on for size. Look in the mirror and say I love you..... and mean it. We are our own best friend or enemy. I try to be a good friend to myself. I am the only one living between my ears.
Maybe being of service to others is a way to stay out of our heads and stop being so self centered. When we can get to the place when we are not our own worst critic, we will have peace. I sure have found some of that.
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Edge
Trad climber
New Durham, NH
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Aug 14, 2012 - 01:01pm PT
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Brandon,
I have to ask; after stating your intention to become sober here on this forum, how did those few drinks go down? Did they have the same old effect as always, or did some little part of you know that this was not for your highest good? If it's the latter, and I pray for your sake that it was, then you have started an amazing journey with unlimited potential.
I drank for 31 years, the last 8 quite heavily. It was fairly standard for me to polish off a half gallon of vodka between 2 PM and bedtime, or more precisely, pass out time. I was still able to function at work, so I saw no big deal, just those pesky family members who wanted me present and a part of their lives. I hid bottles everywhere, and just wanted them to leave me alone so that I could drink the way I wanted to.
Four years ago I was told to check into a month of rehab, but after that ended I was back to the bottle after only 4 days, and so went right back for another month. I wanted to stop drinking, but really, I wasn't ready to stop. As a result, I continued to drink for 2 more years of increasing hell. Waking up in the morning with the shakes so bad that all you can think of is running over to the general store at 6:20 AM while the wife is in the shower just so that you can buy a 2 liter bottle of cheap wine so that you could function is not fun, and it sure isn't pretty.
Two years ago, with my marriage on the brink, no friends because I had isolated, and deteriorating health, I was finally ready. I checked myself this time back into the same rehab on my 49th birthday, and followed the suggestions with the same fervor that I used to drink. I was particularly drawn to the spiritual aspect of my disease, something that I had ignored previously due to reservations about modern day religion. I found that religion and spirituality are not one and the same, and through an introduction to Native American healing circles, I began following these teachings. Connection to the Earth and nature, meditation and prayer (to the "Great Mystery," even Native Americans have a hard time defining the power behind all of life), these all resonated with me. I have not once had even the slightest urge to pick up once in the last 25 months by "practising these principles in all my affairs". Today everything has turned around for me, and my life could not be better.
The best way to start is to join an AA group, get a sponsor, get phone numbers (and use them!) when you are having a struggle, and just keep working at it. I was in AA for about 6 years before my last drink, but the single best thing I did for myself was to stick with it. It worked when I was ready for it to work, physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually.
I wish you success, my friend.
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Michelle
Social climber
SH60091
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Aug 14, 2012 - 09:03pm PT
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I forgot about this thread! Holy cow. Michelle is hanging in there.
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Plaidman
Trad climber
South Slope of Mt. Tabor, Portland, Oregon, USA
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Aug 14, 2012 - 09:51pm PT
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RIGHT ON Michelle!!!!!
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moresnowplease
Sport climber
MAmmoth Lakes, CA
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Aug 14, 2012 - 10:14pm PT
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This is my first post. I've lurked on this board for awhile.
I'm proud to report im 19 mos sober. Its not been super easy. I own a little beer pub and all my climbing partners seem to always involve beer or weed at some point in the day. Its frustrating and I understand what you are going through in terms of identity. I feel left out a lot. But the bottom line is that I look back and see the sh#t show I was drinking and just do not want to go back to those problems or worse problems. I wish i could find more sober friends that enjoy doing what I do and its super hard living in a mountain/tourist town.
FWIW I appreciate your honesty and thank you for posting this thread. I dont feel so alone when I know others are going through some of the same sh#t.
OK duh i just looked at the date of this thread but my inspired words will remain haha.
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kaholatingtong
Trad climber
the green triangle, cali
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Aug 14, 2012 - 11:11pm PT
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10 months today. so worth it.
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tradmanclimbs
Ice climber
Pomfert VT
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Aug 14, 2012 - 11:29pm PT
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Dude you can do it! The bartender @ the restarunte that i worked at in a former life was sober... Club soda w/ a lime should get you through work no problem:) that and watching what happens to all the drunks @ your bar.....
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happiegrrrl
Trad climber
www.climbaddictdesigns.com
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Aug 26, 2012 - 03:10pm PT
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Sixteen Candles.....on my Sober Birthday Cake today!
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Michelle
Trad climber
the f*#king peninsula.
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Aug 26, 2012 - 03:30pm PT
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Happy happy bday happie!
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Jaybro
Social climber
Wolf City, Wyoming
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Aug 26, 2012 - 05:25pm PT
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Happy, Happi! And everyone else out there!
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Crimpergirl
Sport climber
Boulder, Colorado!
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Aug 26, 2012 - 07:05pm PT
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Yes - a very happy birthday to you Happie!
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tradmanclimbs
Ice climber
Pomfert VT
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Aug 26, 2012 - 09:31pm PT
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Cool Happy! I made it past my 6th yesterday without even knowing it was the day? just remembered when i saw your post...
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happiegrrrl
Trad climber
www.climbaddictdesigns.com
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Aug 27, 2012 - 12:59pm PT
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Congrats to you, too, Tradman! I also went through a phase for some of the week coming to my anniversary where I forgot, but then on Saturday I was walking the Shongum Path and recalled... I was thinking "Okay, so it's 11am on the day before my first sober day, 16 years ago... Where was I at this moment?
I happened to be in Bloomingdales, and one of the expensive health and beauty people had snagged me with a free something or other. She got me in the chair, said "Let's have a look at your skin....Brought this gigantic magnifying mirror to my face and snapped on the light.
"GAAAAAHHHHH!" My pours looked like they were big enough to place a purple tricam in, lines like deadly crevasses... She said "Oh, you really do need help." And I walked away with a FORTY-FIVE DOLLAR bottle of face cream the size of my thumb. I recall thinking, in my muddled mind, that maybe this cream would be the thing that makes my life okay...
Oh boy!
(And I should mention that since I have been living in the cabin/on the road, I haven't touched face cream OR cleanser to my face in about two years. My skin is as good-looking as it has ever been, maybe even better. It's quite interesting, how we believe the consumerists BS we're told....).
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LuckyPink
climber
the last bivy
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Sep 22, 2012 - 12:19am PT
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I guess there should be another thread.. the Codependent thread..for those whose dearest loved ones are alcoholics, sober or not.
I hope for some insight into the tough side of those relationships. How much success have people had in the 12 step groups? I've tried a couple but never clicked. It's the long term relationships that are the hardest, I think, because it so easy for habits to become entrenched by repetition.
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