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Reeotch
climber
4 Corners Area
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Jan 15, 2015 - 07:56pm PT
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"Locker and Norwegian"
+1
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WyoRockMan
climber
Flank of the Big Horns
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Jan 15, 2015 - 07:57pm PT
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I'd watch the Ballad of Burt Bronson.
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SteveW
Trad climber
The state of confusion
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Jan 15, 2015 - 08:20pm PT
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I vote for GRUG!!!!
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Spider Savage
Mountain climber
The shaggy fringe of Los Angeles
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Jan 15, 2015 - 08:47pm PT
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Colin,
A. The people you want will not apply. You have to go talk them into it. They don't follow media like this web site.
B. This forum is like a real life version of the cast of The Grand Budapest Hotel. It's rather a surreal group. Everyone is way over 50 and or really hammered.
C. Just hire John Long to assist with casting. He'll be cheap, he's got industry cred, and he knows what he's doing. http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0519026/bio?ref_=nm_ov_bio_sm
D. If John is too much, you can hire me. I'm even cheaper, I once helped Frank Marshall typeset his business cards while Kathleen Kennedy made suggestions, and I think I know what I'm doing.
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climbski2
Mountain climber
Anchorage AK, Reno NV
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Jan 15, 2015 - 08:55pm PT
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Paging Vitaly. I'd throw in Burchey and ice chick or whatever her name is. if you can find pellucid Wombat mebbe. Donini would be awesome if you could get him. Obi Wan in person. If you got Donini I would watch every episode. You wouldn't get him if it were not going to be really good.. best luck even then.
Seriously contact John Long as mentioned by spider.
Hmm.. Offhand it would seem like an amazing gig..
In reality.. climbers? gawd we are a dysfunctional bunch when it comes to throwing us in a pot together.
Entertainment is a strange biz for obsessed recluses with poor social skillz. Which describes a lot of the hardcorp climbers.
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limpingcrab
Trad climber
the middle of CA
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Jan 15, 2015 - 09:08pm PT
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Second the Vitaliy vote.
He's even got a sexy exotic accent.
Get on there and apply V
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Ghost
climber
A long way from where I started
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Jan 15, 2015 - 09:17pm PT
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canyoncat
Social climber
SoCal
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Jan 15, 2015 - 09:21pm PT
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A couple of kids claw their way up some granite and this is the result. Reality bullshit with biners. Everything is fair game to make a buck.
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climbski2
Mountain climber
Anchorage AK, Reno NV
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Jan 15, 2015 - 09:23pm PT
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^ see what I mean?
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ms55401
Trad climber
minneapolis, mn
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Jan 15, 2015 - 11:10pm PT
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yeah, Jeremey and his mom, obviously
vitaly
FISH as emeritus climber
whitemeat as up and comer who can't spell or write at a 10th grade level but is still cool
Pyro
Medusa (too obvious)
The Climber Former Known as Locker
Jody (???)
Werner von ...
WELD_IT
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Bill Mc Kirgan
Trad climber
Cedar Rapids, Iowa
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Jan 16, 2015 - 03:58am PT
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IF done accurately it will be boring to all but climbers.
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Norwegian
Trad climber
dancin on the tip of god's middle finger
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Jan 16, 2015 - 05:00am PT
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i'm out man.
though thanks for the votes.
i had the cobain look goin for a while,
then i tended toward rod stewart,
but now,
slowly, everything is becoming night.
as each day i pack more and more
fine wood particles into my eyes,
i can't see.
so i walk around with them
exceedingly open, like someone trying
to find a light switch in a dark closet.
my wife says that she can see
the whites of my eyes, in a complete ring...
like i'm a night creature now,
perhaps a possum or maybe a wombat.
and they weep, man.
they weep like awful precipitate tears.
they are caves. dark and full of secrets.
you can shout into my eyes
and you'll hear an echo.
i swear.
throw a coin into them
and make a wish.
go ahead, i'll do my best to convert it to mo'money.
and i'm an awful drunk, too.
with tall boots full of piss.
you see i gotta drink hard whiskey
until my sorrows well up and
fall out of my eyes in
an acrid solution that kills
some of the wood culture
callin me home.
then, if i look just right-askew
i can see a star.
and the moon, though blurry.
but i never wish.
never, ever. my dad always told me,
and to this day i still don't get it
but i remember it:
"wish in one and shite in the other.
see which one gets full faster."
my last last emotional horizon is also
doomed.
that being dreams.
i'm seizing that channel
like a snipped vas-deferens.
i went to see the doctor about that,
she lives 3-doors up in a black house
with a black fence and car, though no black cat.
for a small fee,
she's murdering my glee.
plus i'd be no good as a millionaire.
i need my poverty.
i need it like the junky needs his dirty needle.
wellness and i, we had a falling out.
i used to have that chick wrapped around
my pinky, with a pink bow in her hair.
i went to college and got some degrees.
then i sat around big wood tables
in leather chairs wearing clean clothes
throwing stellar ideas at the
world that just wanted to left alone.
i been down that not-dusty road
and i learned that i'd rather
have dirt in my eyes
than concrete fines in my lies.
so you see, i'm not screen worthy.
though perhaps i could voice in for
locker.
or maybe contribute to the script.
my pen has a mind of its own.
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Crazy Bat
Sport climber
Birmingham, AL & Seweanee, TN
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Jan 16, 2015 - 07:05am PT
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This post is almost word for word an appeal that went out to cavers a few years ago. A serious producer, who was a caver got with them. They made one episode that was aired as a special and declared that the environment was just too difficult to film in. Of course only the caver producer/vidiographer ever went in the cave and they had a deep cave incident resulting in an amazing self rescue by the cavers involved. The victim was someone the producers insisted on having in the cast. The other cast members/cavers were not happy with that choice. Sorry I don't remember the name of the special and I don't think I would post it anyway. Very embarrassing.
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phylp
Trad climber
Upland, CA
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Jan 16, 2015 - 10:21am PT
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There are some fine serious suggestions here
Jim Donini
Miles and Amy
all adept on crags and alpine
but it's pretty easy to read through the past couple of years of Rock and Ice and Climbing mags, and see who they have profiled. They highlight the range from teens to "older".
Stevie Haston would be great IMO.
I'd watch something like this if you had a range of ages. If it was just 20-somethings it would be pretty boring.
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Don Paul
Big Wall climber
Denver, Colorado
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Jan 16, 2015 - 10:36am PT
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Oh come on Norwegian, don't be so shy. My recommendation is to go to camp 4 and immerse yourself in the culture for a couple of days at least. You have to guerrilla camp the first night, then get up at 4:00 AM and sit in line at the ranger kiosk to try to get a campsite. You need to brush your teeth and clean your dishes at the camp 4 outhouse. Then you will have a better perspective on the community and be able to identify people who seem to embody it. Also watch the video, Ground Up Perspectives before you make yours. Its on youtube.
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Reilly
Mountain climber
The Other Monrovia- CA
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Jan 16, 2015 - 10:37am PT
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If you can do a voice similar to Sean Connery
Including the lisp?
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Larry Nelson
Social climber
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Jan 16, 2015 - 11:17am PT
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Locker wrote:
"Including the lisp?"...
Yesh...
LOL. Locker now the frontrunner as the hero's comical sidekick.
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dave729
Trad climber
Western America
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Jan 16, 2015 - 11:34am PT
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Viewers want to see the car crash. You tease it too long they will change the channel.
And all that travel is costly and time consuming. A rock is a rock
and gravity is going to have its way no matter where.
Maybe show pictures of monster crags around the world. Introduce this weeks
climber victims. Show them climbing any old steep rock. Show them falling.
Zoom in on the crotch pincing dynamic belay. Splatter
a little blood around.
Show their happy but limping self rescue back to the car.
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