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apogee
climber
Technically expert, safe belayer, can lead if easy
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Topic Author's Original Post - Mar 26, 2014 - 02:17pm PT
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(Excerpted & expanded from the ‘Physical Threats’ thread)
RyanD: "....nice little thread wrecking triangle of hate that the rest of us get to deal with."
Yeah...you're right about that, Ryan. I'd like to apologize to all other users of this Forum who have been impacted by my role in this shitshow. Ron's posting behavior may be over the line, but it was my choice to respond to it the way that I have, and for all other users, it has only doubled the negativity that Ron projects.
I’ve got lots of other views on what constitutes ‘harassment’, ‘stalking’, making physical threats towards others, seeking & posting of personal information for vindictive purposes, personal privacy & avatar names…but they are separate issues from the simple fact that my response to Ron since last Fall has negatively & selfishly impacted others here. I will save those views for other threads, and allow this one to focus on the regret I have for my role in increasing the negative experience for others.
Any criticism that has been leveled regarding this kind of sh#t getting waaaay out of perspective, is well-deserved. I appreciate this Forum, and almost all of the people who contribute to it, even the harshest detractors have something to teach me about interacting with others in this world. Most reasonable persons would say it’s pretty silly to hold an internet forum in such regard, but it’s just plain true.
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JEleazarian
Trad climber
Fresno CA
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Mar 26, 2014 - 02:45pm PT
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That was a classy act, apogee. Don't be too hard on yourself. I think we've all posted things at one time or another that we wish we never sent.
As I said yesterday, I appreciate your presence here.
John
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John M
climber
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Mar 26, 2014 - 02:46pm PT
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Thanks Apogee. I appreciate that. I was never for condoning some of Ron's behavior. I was just hoping that you would see what you do now. I would also not expect you to just sit silently. Of course you should speak up. But hopefully speak to the point and not the person. In the years since supertopo started I haven't seen one person change because someone decided to make them their project. It just doesn't work. Lois never changed. Fattrad didn't change. Rox did for a very short time, but then went right back to his hate speech. Remember Matt riding Fattrad? It didn't do anything other then make more noise. I have no idea what the solution is for people like this. I don't believe in that script that blocks one from seeing certain users. I suppose that helps some, but to me some users dominate the whole conversation so much that it would be difficult to follow the conversation if I can't see what they said. So that doesn't work for me. The same goes for just ignoring them. You still can't really follow the conversation and sometimes there are people whose ideas and thoughts I want to understand and know, but if I am missing the context, then they can be hard to follow.
So I have no real solution except my own which is to try and not add too much to the noise. Thanks again for the apology.
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pyro
Big Wall climber
Calabasas
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Mar 26, 2014 - 02:49pm PT
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Just another way to get people on ur side!!!
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ!
who cares if u like to play bully man! you have to live with it
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John M
climber
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Mar 26, 2014 - 02:51pm PT
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I'm calling BULLSH!T!!!...
well, you are an expert…
in producing it. heh heh..
:-)
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dirtbag
climber
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Mar 26, 2014 - 02:54pm PT
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I like both you and Ron and I don't want to see either of you get banned. Perhaps mutual avoidance is in order?
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survival
Big Wall climber
Terrapin Station
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Mar 26, 2014 - 02:57pm PT
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That BrBa avatar pic is the best!
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JEleazarian
Trad climber
Fresno CA
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Mar 26, 2014 - 03:01pm PT
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I like both you and Ron and I don't want to see either of you get banned.
Hear, hear!
John
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PAUL SOUZA
Trad climber
Central Valley, CA
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Mar 26, 2014 - 03:01pm PT
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...even the harshest detractors have something to teach me about interacting with others in this world.
Reminds me of a quote....
"Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves." C.G. Jung
;)
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jstan
climber
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Mar 26, 2014 - 03:01pm PT
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In different environments, people respond differently, as this thread already demonstrates. Protecting that environment should be taken as a priority far more important than just about anything else. It is a very serious failure for everyone when members of Congress stop referring to each other as "the Honorable...."
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Daphne
Trad climber
Northern California
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Mar 26, 2014 - 03:05pm PT
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Playing around on supertopo is a sure way to increase the rush of dopamine in your brain. I marvel at how obsessively I can check on a thread in which I have participated.
http://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2012/07/exploiting-the-neuroscience-of-internet-addiction/259820/
How much more dopamine must course through the brain when the forum "discussion" begins to feel like a video game, in which your "enemy" is defeated.
I myself can get quite reactive around here, but I use this rule: I type out my comment and read it and, MOST of the time, hit the delete key.
I now proclaim that I will NOT obsessively check this thread to see how the discussion prevails, and I am not going to argue my point with anyone.
see, I checked, and I am going to hit 'post this reply' just so I can follow through on my pledge
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climbski2
Mountain climber
Anchorage AK, Reno NV
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Mar 26, 2014 - 03:09pm PT
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As in life there are people who can rub you the wrong way. I like both of you. Rons a damn nice guy in person. His online persona ..well the intardnet does strange things to all of us. I even rant here once in a while.
Peace
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apogee
climber
Technically expert, safe belayer, can lead if easy
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Topic Author's Reply - Mar 26, 2014 - 03:12pm PT
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"....I will save those views for other threads..."!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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skcreidc
Social climber
SD, CA
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Mar 26, 2014 - 03:15pm PT
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right on. maybe there is hope for humanity after all.
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mechrist
Gym climber
South of Heaven
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Mar 26, 2014 - 03:17pm PT
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haha, John said hard on.
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JEleazarian
Trad climber
Fresno CA
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Mar 26, 2014 - 03:28pm PT
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Wes, I'm glad you can't see me blushing!
John
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apogee
climber
Technically expert, safe belayer, can lead if easy
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Topic Author's Reply - Mar 26, 2014 - 03:35pm PT
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Point taken, GL.
I suppose I still believe that to be true to the extent that 'engaging' them doesn't create an excessively negative experience for others here (as has happened recently).
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Dapper Dan
Trad climber
Menlo Park
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Mar 26, 2014 - 04:06pm PT
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Good post Daphne , I sometimes get all worked up at certain posts or threads that I'm involved in too. Blood pressure rises , heart rate increases , all that ...
The bottom line for me is that I just don't want to be a negative, sarcastic , derogatory person online anymore , not just here , but anytime I communicate online . It took a long time for me to figure that out. I still slip back into old habits , of always needing to get the last word in , or make the other person wrong ...
Often it just comes down to self-control to not type something caustic , and to not hit that send button.
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Ghost
climber
A long way from where I started
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Mar 26, 2014 - 04:17pm PT
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Very much appreciated.
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BLUEBLOCR
Social climber
joshua tree
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Mar 26, 2014 - 04:21pm PT
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Good apollogee apogee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
My hope is that it was from the heart and not jus words on a screen.
Maybe something will reciprocate?
Meantime, change means going in the opposite direction.
Maybe you can show Ron how to be a better person? From ur perspective.
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